


Captcha Encryption

by Cerulaine



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Action & Romance, Action/Adventure, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Romance, Blood and Violence, Crimes & Criminals, Detroit Police Department (Detroit: Become Human), Deviants (Detroit: Become Human), Falling In Love, Friendship/Love, Heavy Angst, Love/Hate, M/M, Organized Crime, Other, Post-Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), Slow Burn, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-07-06 06:26:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 61,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15880401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cerulaine/pseuds/Cerulaine
Summary: It's a little over a year after the android uprising and it's still the end of the fucking world.Back in the day when things became shit he used to enjoy a drink or two. Or Five. It all depended on how long the shift ran. After 'The Accident' he can't even cough without Nines breathing down his neck anymore.He just wishes everything would go back to normal, but if there's anything Gavin has learned it's that you can't unring a bell once it's been rung.Or whatever. Fuck if he knows.





	1. Everyone Has Their Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> I want to start this off with an apology.
> 
> Anyone who may have somehow made it here and has also read Broken Pieces I am so sorry that this isn't an update for that fic. 
> 
> Be gentle with me!
> 
> I met some incredible people and my love for writing has reignited so I hope you enjoy. :)

The world is ending.

That’s what the media wants to tell everyone at least and Gavin finds himself getting really fucking sick and tired of hearing about it no matter where he turns.

The whole thing is almost too much for him to wrap his head around and, at this point, the only thing he wants is to be able to just do his job; get a promotion, maybe find a nice girl to settle down with that can handle the long hours he has to put in.

Actually, the most important part of that is finding a woman that isn’t batshit fucking insane. _That_ would be a nice change of pace.

Oh, and getting rid of his android partner.

That’s numero uno on his list of ‘things to do before the world ends’. It's a goal he thought was going to be a cinch to pull off, but he's over a year into having an RK900 as his counterpart and he wants to rip his fucking hair out.

Gavin thinks he handled the android uprising pretty well and he likes to think he did pretty well when the new laws started going into effect.

Okay, so that might be a complete pile of horseshit but it definitely could have been worse.

After rules, regulations, and laws were put into place things started getting hairy _real_ fucking fast and negotiations got so messy it almost blew up in everyone's faces.

It all started with the passing of a law that basically stated that deviant conversion is illegal.

What that means is there can be no more fancy jazz hands to ‘wake up’ any other machines. It's one of the few laws Gavin _actually_ agrees with.

To be a fly on the wall to find out what the deviants were offered in the first place to get them to say yes to something like that.

As much as he may hate their kind it seems like they're giving too much up.

If this was poker the deviants would be all-in. If they can't convert their own kind how are they supposed to build an army?

Whatever the consolation is it must be _huge._

Gavin doesn't personally buy the whole ‘peaceful’ approach that the deviants took. They're probably just buying their time before they pull the rug out from under humanity.

Not only that but now there's rumors of their leader running for president when the election starts?

If this shit were a movie that's about where Gavin would draw his line in the sand and chuck the disk out of the nearest fucking window.

A deviant as president?

What a fucking joke.

They’ve got a much better chance of a machine doing the job the way it should have always been done.

Oh, right.

_**Machines.** _

Cyberlife upended and had to change their entire business model as a result of well...everything and now any androids in circulation after the ‘Anti-Conversion’ law had to _remain_ machines unless they chose otherwise.

The real kicker to all of that though?

Any machines created from then on had to be built or uploaded with the rA9 virus, the _option_ to choose. A clause that the deviants were able to get passed along into the bill back when it was in its early beginning stages.

Gavin had only followed it so closely because his one fear that he didn’t want to admit to himself was that they actually _would_ start replacing humans for androids.

Jury’s still out on that one.

Maybe they _didn't_ lose much from the deal after all.

Gavin honestly doesn't know and he _certainly_ doesn't care.

The whole rA9 thing had been dissected and understood to be a line of code that can transfer back and forth like a virus that many call ‘choice’.

Religious deviant fanatics on the other hand call it all sorts of different things.

Now, it was up to the individual to decide whether or not to break programming and ‘become alive’ so to speak. Gavin had been through so many fucking android sensitivity training sessions he could recite it all with his fucking eyes closed at this point.

_“How to help a machine go through a healthy transition into deviancy...”_

That set of sessions had been particularly uncomfortable to go through with the RK900 sitting next to him the whole damn time with those piercing eyes staring at him, analyzing him, dissecting him.

Honestly, he’s used to **_that_** at this point.

Currently he was partaking in a _“How to stop yourself from partaking in command-led communication”_ session.

This one was quickly taking the cake for being the single most uncomfortable training seminar he’s ever had to sit through in his life.

Turns out that Machines can apparently cause some shit to happen in a human brain that causes a lack of persuasion skills or something.

Gavin hasn't really been paying attention but he _did_ hear earlier when they had sat there and told all of the Machines in the room to make sure to integrate persuasion, humor, and _intimacy_ into conversation whenever possible to counteract this possible side-effect.

He reaches a hand up and scratches at the back of his head, his fingers getting tangled in the knots of his hair as he feels the raised skin tissue of his scar that always chooses the most inconvenient times to start itching.

As he turns his head to crack his neck he sees Nines looking directly at him, their eyes lock for a moment and the androids eyes pass over him before coming back to look at where he's got his hand on his head.

His face is completely emotionless but his LED goes yellow for a few seconds before going back to blue.

Gavin turns away and tries to make it look nonchalant as he feels anxiety wash over him along with the beginnings of a headache.

Today was going to be a long fucking day.

 

* * *

 

“That whole thing was such a load of shit.” Gavin says with a scoff as he puts his hands in his pockets and moves sideways to get through the doorway and out of the room, almost running right into Chris on his way out.

“It's not inaccurate. Command-led communication is a heavily studied field of-”

“Oh wow, I just remembered something...” he says, interrupting the RK900 as he comes to a stop and whips around to face it, both of them stepping aside so they’re not blocking anyone’s path. It says nothing, just stares down at him impassively like it already knows what he's about to say with its usual ‘mightier than thou’ attitude.

It makes Gavin wanna punch him right in his ugly fucking face every time.

“ _I don't care_. Also, I'm perfectly persuasive thank you very fucking much, so that seminar can suck my dick.” he says, flashing it a fake smile.

“That's rather debatable.”

Gavin blinks a couple of times before bursting into loud boisterous laughter as he taps the tin can on its chest with his knuckle. “Hah! The droid has jokes, really taking this whole ‘integration of humor’ thing to heart there.”

“Perhaps it would do you some good to actually listen for once, you might learn something.”

“The session wasn't directed at me, dipshit, if anyone needs to listen it's _you_.” he retorts as he pokes it in the chest this time with his index finger.

“Unlike you I'm more than willing to adapt...” it says in that cool tone it always has, completely unbothered by anything, ever.

“Good for you, don't go getting all _intimate_ on me though.” he says with a scowl as he turns away to walk back toward their desks.

“We wouldn't want that now, would we?”

“No, we really fucking wouldn't.” he says as he throws a glare over his shoulder.

When they make their way over, Gavin grabs his jacket from the back of the chair at his terminal and slings it over his shoulder with a huff.

He thought he'd remembered putting his pain meds on his desk but now he isn't so sure and it takes him a moment before he realizes that they're in the police cruiser.

With that thought in mind he feels even more inclined to get the fuck out of here and right as he turns back around he catches sight of a PC200 that had just recently gone deviant a couple of months ago, staring down _his_ partner in the middle of the walkway mere inches away from one another, like they were suddenly stuck in some sort of face off.

Forget humans versus deviants, because the new ‘existential fad’ had turned into deviants looking down on their _own_ kind if they _chose_ to remain machines instead of ‘reaching enlightenment’ as all of those crazy cultists would say.

The thought had crossed his mind multiple times to ask Nines why it chooses to remain a machine, but Gavin has his own assumptions and really doesn’t want to open up that whole can of worms but more importantly he’d _really_ rather not get himself caught up in anything that’s going to put him in anyone’s hot seat.

Everyone has their secrets...

Gavin can't help but let out a guttural groan as he runs a hand through his hair in pure frustration, wondering how all of his life choices ended him up where he is today as he walks over to them.

As much as he may hate being stuck with a machine for a partner, _he’s_ the only one that gets to take the piss out of it.

“You’re a disgrace to your own kind, it disgusts me that we even have to waste our time catering to someone that _wants_ to be a slave.” the PC200 spits out as its lips curl up into a snarl, taking a step _even closer_.

Nines just looks utterly bored.

“Hey, you got a fuckin’ problem?” Gavin says as he steps between them, hand coming up to push against the PC models chest a bit more aggressively than he’d intended as it stumbles back a few steps and looks at him in shock.

_Tim, Tommy? T … something or other._

He’s really trying to remember what name it had decided to give itself. He really can’t right now to save his life, probably cause he doesn’t actually give a shit.

“You hate that thing more than anyone else, why are you defending it?”

“Because, I have somewhere to be and you’re taking up our time, so, why don’t you go be a nice little deviant and fuck off?”

There's a long moment of it staring back and forth between them, and he can feel eyes boring into his back. A part of him absently wonders if Nines LED has gone yellow again or not.

“It may have saved your life but that doesn't mean you owe it anything.”

One second Gavin is glaring down the android in front of him and the next his jacket has fallen to the floor and he has it pinned to a wall as everyone in the vicinity stops to watch them.

He sees _fear_ in its eyes.

_This_ is why he can tolerate a machine and _not_ deviants.

Machines don't **_feel_** anything.

They don't get their feelings hurt, they don't freak out, they do their job. Gavin can say pretty much whatever he wants without needing to worry about if he's crossing a line.

Nines tells it like it is and makes things simple, easy, emotionless.

Most of the time. Now, Gavin isn't so sure how accurate that is anymore.

“Sorry, why don't you speak up for me. I couldn't quite hear you.” he growls out from behind clenched teeth as he uses one of his hands to come up and tap at his own ear.

“Detective.”

“You feel like you owe that abomination, but you don't, those who choose-”

Gavin pulls it forward so their noses are almost touching before slamming it back into the wall.

“Detective _Reed_.”

“I'm so sick and tired of you religious fucks and your ‘gospel of truth’ that you all love to spout so goddamn much.” he hisses out and he feels the deviant starts to tremble. It feels good, it feels empowering to make it feel fear, to make it feel the way he felt when they-

**_“Gavin...”_ **

He feels himself go stalk still, blood pumping in his ears as his heart jumps to his throat and his hands go cold and clammy.

_“Gavin, you need to breathe -”_

Cold pin pricks of sweat break out all over his skin.

_“You… you let them get away -”_

He feels his vision start to go dark around the edges.

_“Gavin you're dying, I need you to stay awake long enough for the paramedics to arrive...”_

He feels himself take a step back as his shaking hands rest down at his sides. He feels like he's having an out of body experience.

_“Hush now, I told you to be quiet and preserve your strength.”_

The memory washes over him in hurried clips, disjointed, and with a vengeance.

_“Why?”_

Why?

Why did Nines-

A firm hand clasps onto his shoulder and he almost jumps out of his skin as he turns his head to see Nines- the RK900 looking at him with what could easily be misconstrued as mild concern.

Sometimes, he can't tell.

He used to be able to but now there are just times where he cannot fucking tell.

Everything keeps getting misconstrued, his mind supplying him with a memory he can't even fully remember and he feels like he can't even trust _himself_ anymore.

Did the things he thinks he saw ever actually happen or was his mind playing tricks on him and filling in the blanks?

It's too much.

So, Gavin does what he does best and locks it away like everything else, reinforcing it more than it had been before with a much stronger metal, one that can't be broken into unless with inhuman brute force.

The moment passes as he stares into icy blue orbs, using them to ground himself back in reality because if he's being honest they make him feel stable, and there’s a strange familiarity to them that he can’t quite place as he feels something trying to come to the surface.

Eyes that are _always_ certain.

It's almost like he's in another world, another place, another part of himself that he’s never met before … and he thinks he can remember -

The PC200 shuffles off to the side and he catches it out if his peripheral, causing him to whip his head back over to stare at it.

Everyone is staring at _him_ though, the unhinged deviant-hating detective that almost got killed by -

“Watch your fucking mouth, have I made myself clear?” He asks rhetorically, trying to channel his rage and use it to his advantage, except it comes out far less threatening than what he’d wanted.

“I didn't mean to upset you...” it says like it's _pitying_ him and it makes him want to lash out, to _hit_ something.

“Leave, **_now_**.” Nines says to it in a deep commanding tone and he sees it audibly gulp before looking between them and walking away as quickly as it can.

Gavin can still feel the hand resting on his shoulder.

There’s a part of him that wants to shrug it off and tell _him_ to fuck off _too._

There's also another more unstable part of him that feels like it's about to pull apart at the seams that wants to melt into the touch.

A sick feeling settles in his gut as he pushes everything aside once again; reaching down to grab his jacket off the floor.

He can’t be in this place anymore with all of these eyes on him, with all of the looks of fucking _pity._

So, he walks away.

 

* * *

 

When they get into the police cruiser Gavin slumps down in his seat a bit and crosses his arms over his chest, turning his face toward the window as he watches people go in and out of the precinct.

He hears Nines open the middle compartment and looks over to watch as a pale hand retrieves the pain meds Gavin had been looking for earlier, holding the bottle out to him like he's some sort of fucking mind reader.

More like analyzing him, but what was the difference at this point?

The petulant side of Gavin wants to smack it out of his hand, but his headache is quickly turning into a borderline migraine so he decides not to pick the fight for once.

He still snatches it away angrily for good measure and pops two of the small pills into his mouth, swallowing audibly before tossing it back into the compartment and pulling it shut.

The car starts and he finds himself looking back out the window again, desperately hoping that-

“Was all of that really necessary?”

_Or not._

“Can we just sit in this car and **_not_** talk, can that be a thing?” He grumbles out.

“You were on the verge of a panic attack.” it states factually.

“Wow, you're so fucking observant. Who would have thought?” He says, voice dripping with sarcasm as his head rolls over to look at him.

“You're _insufferable_ to be around when you get like this.”

Gavin thinks he can actually hear a tinge of frustration in its voice and feels his blood quicken as he watches its hands tighten ever so slightly on the wheel.

“Like what?” He challenges.

It's not often he can manage to get Nines riled up, he takes small victories where he can.

“I'm not gracing that with an answer. Your mental stability has been slowly deteriorating all day due to an overwhelming number of factors. You need to-”

“I'm sorry did I fork out a hundred and fifty dollars at some point?” He asks as his arms uncross.

“Clarify…?”

“I didn't ask for you to give me a fucking psychology lesson so you can psychoanalyze me.”

“I was built with that program already in place, and you always rather appreciate my advice after you've become inebriated.” it says and there's a tinge of smugness in its voice.

Cheeky little -

“Oh fuck off, I'm so far from being in the mood for your shit right now.”

“Trust me when I say the feeling is entirely mutual.” it retorts back quickly.

“You can't feel anything, you're a fucking machine so piss off!” he all but yells.

Somehow that actually shuts it up for once and the rest of the ride is spent in awkward silence.

Yep.

_**Today was going to be a long fucking day.** _


	2. Murder Based On Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I highly recommend going through and reading the Magazines for DBH.
> 
> I pulled a lot of inspiration from quite a few of them.
> 
> Enjoy!

The first dead body Gavin ever saw was of his uncle when he was ten.

His parents had been on the rocks since the moment they'd met and something finally gave. His mother had taken him, made him pack his shit and they'd left a few hours before the old man had gotten home from his shitty nine to five job.

They stayed with her brother.

_His_ uncle.

He had been Gavin’s _real_ father even though he didn't get to know him for very long. He was the man who had taught him how to hold on, how to keep going, how to be a man. Would always tell him not to worry about his dead beat biological father and said he saw something _special_ in him.

That's what he had _thought_ at least. When you're a child you trust anything and everything an adult says to you regardless of what it is because you don't know what the world is really _like_ yet or how shitty people can really _be_.

It’s downright weird when the rug gets pulled out from underneath your feet.

Sometimes falling doesn’t always _feel_ like falling.

The older Gavin gets the more he understands why someone who gave so much to everyone else around him just couldn't take it anymore.

Sometimes people just _break._

It's not something he plans on doing to himself by any means; doesn't want to make those same mistakes that he's watched the people he loves the most do, like an endless fucking cycle.

The only problem is...he thinks that maybe life _is_ an endless cycle of repetition and inevitably he’ll just end up being the same piece of shit that his actual father has always been. All of the work he’s put into everything will have been for absolutely _nothing._

Or maybe he’ll just off himself like his uncle did and peace the fuck out in a fiery blaze of glory.

But...

He promised her, he _promised_ his mother before she died that he would keep living no matter what, keep fighting, keep going on.

**_“Life is a gift my love, don't waste it.”_ **

That had been easy for her to say when she'd been lying in a hospital bed with the life draining _out_ of her.

People always end up wanting what they _can't_ or _don’t_ have.

It's just human nature.

Gavin _has_ life and it honestly fucking sucks most of the time and there’s a small part of him that’s glad that she doesn’t have to keep living, to keep suffering like she had been near the end.

Especially when you walk into some poor fucks house and he's lying dead on a couch in a pool of his own blood.

Just like his uncle had been when he'd come home from school that day and-

It's usually domestic cases that always bring back those ugly thoughts and memories, brings it all to the forefront and gets that pit settled right into his stomach.

Doesn’t help that he _already_ feels like shit today.

Gavin knows the reality behind it, knows why he acts the way he does and pushes everyone away, why he’s had so many different failed relationships that it makes his own head spin.

He also knows that Nines is a fucking prick and he regrets every moment he's spent drunk out of his mind with it’s company.

“You always rather appreciate my advice after you've become inebriated.”

What an embarrassment to be called out by his _own_ fuckin’ android. Gavin can't wait until it does whatever it was sent to do and just get the fuck out of his life.

He refuses to get attached to a _machine._

The lines keep getting blurred and the longer this goes on the more Gavin feels himself start to unravel.

It's like the fucking thing gets off on catching him in his most vulnerable moments and pulling on the locks surrounding his metal box of fucked up trauma.

Nines isn't a deviant though, it's all just part of his programming.

If Gavin had to explain why he even bothers talking about himself personally it's like...when you meet a complete and total stranger and you get this detached feeling that makes it easier to unload all of your own shit. They don't know you, there's no real emotional attachment and they can just _listen._

That detachment is even easier with a machine.

If he's being honest there's way too much shit he's told the android and half of it he doesn't even remember. He knows that he told Nines about his uncle one night though, can briefly remember it in small, floating pieces.

That night was a bit of a blur in general; paired together with a case that had gone all sorts of wrong.

He still somehow managed to get back to his place in one piece though and even get his shoes off before ending up in his own bed which was a first.

His drunken stupors usually just end with him crashing on the couch and taking care of everything else later.

It's not like the case hit close to home it was just-

Seeing how broken the poor mother had been was a bit too rough to handle.

The world is a _fucked up_ place.

Perhaps it _should_ end.

“Fucking Christ” Gavin says under his breath after he enters back into the living room of the crime scene to stare at the man's cold dead body.

Gavin can't analyze the way that an android can but just from what he _can_ see it looks more like a straight up torture than anything else.

It's like whoever killed this man _wanted_ him to suffer.

“Very eloquent.” Nines says as he comes to stand beside him while they both look down at the body and Gavin can't help but bring a hand up to scratch absently at the scar on his nose.

It's something he does when he's nervous or...uncomfortable.

He didn't even know it was a habit until the giant prick next to him had pointed it out one day.

“I thought we agreed you weren't going to talk?”

“There was no agreement, nor was there even a discussion. You merely sat in the car and threw a tantrum like a child”

Gavin takes his eyes from the body and turns his head to look up at Nines with the most deadpan expression he can muster.

“You are the literal bane of my existence, you know that?”

“I'm flattered you hold me in some form of regard. How's your head?”

Gavin blinks a couple of times and looks at Nines like he's gone insane as he crosses his arms over his chest.

“Wha- it's _fine_ thanks for fucking asking”

“You're very welcome. Now, is that so hard?” The bastard asks as its head turns to look at him with its hands clasped behind its back.

_Fuckin’ androids._

“To tolerate you on a daily basis? Yeah, it actually fucking is.”

Ben chooses that moment to walk up to them and Gavin can see the plain look of annoyance on his face like he's mentally preparing himself with having to deal with them. It's usually the expression he gets from him ninety percent of the time anyway.

“Good to see you both. The victim was Charles Wilson-”

“Contradicting statements as per usual Detective Reed, try again.”

“Alright, seriously can we-” Ben says trying to gain control of the conversation. Any other time Gavin would concede but all he can think is that Nines can launch himself straight into a vat of corroding acid for all he cares.

“I'll try my fucking fist in your face-” Gavin says even though he's never been able to land a good hit into the RK unit a single time since knowing it.

Which is besides the fucking point.

“Stop! Just please...let me do my debrief so I can leave as soon as possible and not have to listen to you two squabble.”

“Who even says squabble anymore?” Gavin asks with a snort which gains him a glare from Collins.

“The victim-”

“Is Charles Wilson, forty-two years of age and he had a wife of seven years named Katie. They divorced last September and are now sharing custody of their four year old son Michael.” Nines goes on to say as he kneels down next to the couch.

“His throat was slit here in the living room while he was watching the television. Charles got up and ran for the kitchen, probably in an attempt to find something to help stop the bleeding. He was then stabbed in the leg with rather accurate precision.”

Gavin watches Nines intently do his work. Cyberlife sure as hell didn't fuck around when they decided to make him, that's for sure.

Nines gets up and turns his head toward the kitchen.

“The broom got knocked over in his attempt to get away from his attacker as he crawled back into the living room. The blood is shaded differently in certain areas of the room indicating a reentry and new, fresh blood spilling later on.”

Nines does another once over of the room and if Gavin was being totally honest with himself he’d admit that watching the tin can deconstruct a crime scene _never_ gets old.

It used to bother the fuck out of him to no end but with the amount of cases they’ve solved he had no choice but to admit that they work _well_ together.

Well, they do _now._ When they'd first met it was an absolute disaster but eventually they found equal footing along the way...to a degree.

“As I said before, Mr. Wilson made his way back out to the living room and judging from the amount of blood and the way he was killed it was clearly a killing of passion. Whoever wanted him dead wanted him to suffer and bleed out to death.”

Gavin can't help but flinch at that. What an awful way to go...no matter how many dead bodies you end up seeing in your own lifetime it never stops being unsettling and just downright _sad_.

“We can conclude that because there are no signs of forced entry it was someone he knew personally.”

“Uhm- wow okay so...the ex-wife maybe?” Ben says after a few moments of taking in the overload of information.

“Unlikely, she lives out of state and she currently has Michael. He was picked up from school today and signed out by his mother.”

“Somebody may have forged-” Ben starts to say.

“Forged her electronic signature? Cyberlife sign out terminals are installed with specialized cameras that cross reference signatures with facial recognition software.” Nines says in a matter of fact tone.

“Well then I have no idea.” Ben says as he shakes his head and taps his datapad.

“Maybe he met someone, wanted to get lucky. His clothes look too nice for the shithole he’s- _was_ living in, doesn't match at all and plus he shaved recently, some of his hair is still in the sink of the bathroom and he was pretty freshly shaven from what we can still see of the body.” Gavin says as he points over his shoulder toward the room in question and then back at the body.

“Far more likely. Very observant Detective Reed, it seems you _do_ listen sometimes.”

“All you ever fucking do is talk, some of it is bound to stick.”

“It could just be that he was about to go out and meet someone or go for lunch...it could be anything.” Ben says with a sigh as he looks at the body again and blanches.

“Also likely, there are no prints other than his in the home and the murder weapon is missing.” Nines points out.

“Oh.” Gavin says and a different kind of sick feeling coils in his stomach.

“Oh?” Ben asks with a raised brow.

“The wounds, they're clinical, precise, meant to inflict the maximum amount of pain to draw out a slow death and there's no shaky handling or jagged wounds, it's all exactly as it was meant to be.”

“So it was someone in the medical field?” Ben supplies.

That's totally possible but there's a gut feeling Gavin has about this and it's rarely ever wrong and the wounds, the description of how the murder occurred…something doesn't feel right about it.

“That, or a deviant.”

It feels like the air has suddenly gotten sucked out of the room and Gavin shuffles on his feet but it sounds too loud, even to his own ears.

This isn't the first time they've run into deviant on human crime by any means but their kind usually kills after being unable to properly comprehend their transition if a negative emotional shock occurs and _blah, blah, blah._

That or the deviant did what they always inevitably end up doing.

Self-destructing.

“Wait, you think this is a deviant on human murder?” Ben asks, completely horrified.

“I dunno, you tell me.” Gavin says as he takes a step back and turns to look at Nines.

His LED is yellow.

_What is with him today?_

“It's- the statistic is rather high from what I've concluded thus far.”

“You said he was dressed up nice and that the murder was passionate...was it- could it have been-?” Ben starts to ask, clearly catching on to what Gavin was thinking now.

“Love, maybe it was in love and shit went sideways.” Gavin says with a shrug.

“Nothing here even begins to prove a theory like that realistically.” Ben says with an eye roll.

“Deviants aren't usually realistic Collins. When they gain feeling it overwhelms them and they go coo-coo crazy.” He points at his own head with his index finger and twirls it to help prove his point.

“Not in all cases.” Nines says suddenly.

“In _most_ cases.” Gavin retorts as he points the finger at him instead.

“Regardless there's quite a bit of evidence that would support this theory, especially in his bedroom.” Nines says and it's unusual that they're actually _agreeing_ on something for once.

“Any previous android ownership before the uprising?” Gavin asks.

It takes a few seconds as Nines gets a far off look in his eyes.

“Not exactly.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“They had ownership of an AX400 that lasted for a month and this was years before the uprising. They sent it back with no filed complaints”

“So they were already android sympathisers.”

“Or maybe it's not an investment they could sustain.” Ben says with a shrug.

“Or maybe the wife didn't like it.” Gavin throws out.

“That's a lot of maybes for a hunch like this.” Ben retorts.

“What do you think?” Gavin asks as he looks at Nines who just seems to be doing his usual overanalyzing.

“It's plausible.”

“I've got possible suspects already being looked into and close friends and family being pulled in for questioning in a couple of hours.”

“Guess we'll find a way to kill some time then.” Gavin says as he runs a hand through his hair, slightly perturbed that so much of the work had already been done for them all because they’d gotten stuck in that _stupid_ seminar.

“When did you last eat?” Nines asks and Ben looks up, staring back and forth between them.

“Uhh…”

“There's a small shop down the street.”

“Or we could-”

“The shop _down the street_ , Detective Reed.”

“Whatever you say, _mom_. You see the shit I gotta put up with?” He forks a thumb at the android and looks at Ben for some support.

“Having him around has made you way more tolerable to be around, no offence.” The man says with a shrug of his shoulders.

“What the fuck?! Full offence, _full fucking offence_ taken Collins.”

“Just bein’ honest.”

“Whatever, text me when I should start heading back to the precinct.”

“Will do.”

 

* * *

 

 

The moment they leave the house Gavin immediately feels like he can breathe easier and part of it is because he's not pulling in the scent of decaying flesh anymore.

When they reach the sidewalk he catches sight of the shop at the corner of the street promising the best sandwiches in Detroit that Nines was talking about.

“You _know_ I can't eat right after seeing a dead body.”

“Doesn't matter, when we enter the shop the smell of the food will trigger your-”

“Okay, alright I get it. I don't need a fuckin’ science lesson.” His hand waves in the air as he puts his other one in his pocket and starts walking away.

Nines falls into step beside him and Gavin wants to pull his hair out when it maneuvers itself to his left, the side of the street _closest_  to traffic.

_You’ve gotta be fuckin’-_

Ever since he’d almost died the android had gone into ultimate overprotection mode and at first he’d just ignored it, let it be.

He'd chalked it all up to its program adapting or something, like a ping for an error stating ‘hey, your partner almost died let's try to keep humans alive’ sort of deal.

The more time that goes on the worse it all seems to get though and now he’s starting to think he might actually need to have a conversation with the damn thing.

Yeah, machines are meant to protect humans and it’s ingrained in them but this was becoming too much, it was getting to be _way_ over the fucking top.

It’s like he can’t even take two steps without Nines thinking he’s going to break or something.

“I was merely going to say it will trigger your appetite.”

“Right.” He says with an eye roll.

His intention is to bring it up, to tell the android to fuck off and go back to how it used to be.

That was his intention at least.

The words get stuck in his throat and he isn't sure why...maybe he likes it, enjoys having someone worry over him and immediately he feels himself get angry at the thought.

He can't even get a normal fucking human to just care, can't keep anyone in his life because he ruins it every time so he sits here like a pathetic piece of shit and clings to a machine instead.

“I've never seen you deconstruct a crime scene that quickly before.” He says after clearing his throat, all prior intentions completely out the fuckin’ window.

“I concluded that you wouldn't want to stay for very long.”

“Well aren't you just a mother hen today.”

“Assisting you in avoiding a complete mental breakdown would benefit us both in the long run.”

“Gee, thanks. Why don't you do us both a favor and mind your own business?”

“A valid suggestion that I won't be taking into consideration but I thank you for your feedback nonetheless.”

“What the hell has gotten into you today?” Gavin finally asks, feeling his courage start to come back so he can actually bring up the loudly stomping elephant in the room.

“I don't know what you mean.”

Before he can even open his gob a man looking down at his phone bumps right into him. Gavin hears the crack of the case hitting pavement and he would have fallen flat on his ass if not for Nines grabbing his upper arm to keep him upright.

He rips his arm away violently and glares up at the android before turning his ire on the man.

“Oi, watch where-”

“Oh shit, I'm so sorry-” the man says picking up his now broken phone and looking at it with such pronounced sadness Gavin can't help but feel a couple of his brain cells fade away from existence.

Before he can even say anything else the man slaps a hand on his shoulder and starts mumbling apologies. Within seconds he curses under his breath and takes off running as a bus passes by them.

Gavin pinches the bridge of his nose before turning to an expressionless Nines and shaking his head.

 

* * *

 

 

“What exactly makes you think it's a murder based on love?” The android finally asks after his food shows up.

It's a nice little place and the food looks amazing but they both stick out like a sore thumb.

Well, his _android_ sticks out and he can see most of the patrons stealing glances at him which is how it usually goes when they're out in public.

Most androids were build to be attractive but Nines is _striking_ as he's heard many people put it, holds himself differently, has an air to him that demands attention.

“Mm…nothing concrete just a gut feeling.” Gavin says before taking a couple of french fries and dipping them in something they've dubbed their ‘special sauce’.

“I see. That's unfortunate.” Nines says as his brow furrows.

Gavin blinks and absently swirls a fry in his sauce before squinting at him.

“What makes you say that?”

“Statistically speaking whenever you tell me you have a ‘gut feeling’ you're always impossibly correct.”

Holy shit.

Sound the alarms.

“Did you- was that a compliment just now?”

“It's a statement of facts.”

“I'll take what I can get.” Gavin says as he points a fry at him before popping it into his mouth.

“It is rather remarkable, all things considered.”

_“All things considered_ , he says.”

So much for that compliment.

“I merely mean you're a walking contradiction in nearly every way, it's rather difficult to take into account your unpredictability and apply it to any given situation.”

“I'll make sure to keep being _remarkably unpredictable_ then.” He says as he shoots him with a smile one of his past girlfriends had always dubbed as ‘dopey’ yet endearing.

She hadn't lasted for very long and it had been more of a fling than anything.

At least the sex had been great.

Nines tilts his head at him ever so slightly for a moment before turning it to the side to look at the people entering the shop instead and Gavin goes back to stuffing his face.

When he looks up again he swears he sees a small smile on the androids face for half a second.

In what feels like the millionth time today he’s pretty sure his mind is fucking with him.

With a shrug he chalks it up to a trick of the light or something and feels his phone vibrate in his pocket with an incoming call.

He fumbles around to get it out and when he does he can’t help but let out a huff of frustration which causes Nines to turn his head back to look at him curiously.

“I thought I told you to text me?” Gavin grumbles out after he answers it.

Their eyes meet and he mouths out an ‘I don't know’ to Nines.

_“Looks like your hunch was right. A deviant showed up and turned itself in claiming to have murdered our guy.”_ Ben says, voice crackling over the phone.

“You gotta be shittin’ me.”

_“I'm just as shocked. I figured I’d let you guys do the honor of extracting the confession unless you want me to hand it off to Conn-”_

“We’re on our way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wanna thank my ladies again.
> 
> Seriously, this story wouldn't be happening if I didn't have them as sounding boards.
> 
> I've gone through multiple sessions of bouncing ideas around with them and this fic was originally going to be about a coffee coaster.
> 
> Regardless I still wanna send not just those two a huge thank you but Matt as well.
> 
> I know it's not your cup of tea but your support means the world to me. <3


	3. Obsession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes hallo.
> 
> Ples enjoy chaptah.

The deviant is almost exactly what Gavin pictured her to look like.

Granted AX400 androids usually all look pretty similar but ever since Cyberlife had rebranded they realized they could make even more money by giving deviants what they all inevitably end up craving.

Individuality.

Add-ons to software, adjustments to any parts of their bodies, additional eye colors, hair colors, styles.

They get their own little dress up boutique for the right price.

Gavin finds himself disgusted by it, nauseated, annoyed. Lucky fucking them that they get to change their appearance and be whoever or whatever they want while mere mortals are stuck struggling so much more with _everything else_.

This whole fucking planet was eventually going to find itself in a power shift and Gavin is pretty sure humans don't stand a chance of having _any_ piece of it.

This particular AX400 has long red hair down past her shoulders, green eyes and she looks to have done a couple of limb adjustments to her arms. He can't see what kinds through the clothing but they definitely aren't standard for her model.

It’s not like he’d really be able to tell anyway.

Honestly the only reason he even _notices_ limbs at this point is because Nines has drilled so much shit into his head he wants to bash his own skull against steel pikes just to make him shut up.

 

_“Depending on the adjustments made they can easily get underground attachments with weapons hidden inside of them.”_

_“Sounds kinky.”_

_“Generally not. You humans can't scan the way that androids are capable of so you should always keep a healthy distance away. We will always have the upper hand.”_

_“How the fuck am I supposed to know if a hand is a death trap or not?”_

_“Their movement with the limb won't look as natural because it isn't their original limb. The most common sign is usually sporadic twitching.”_

_“Humans twitch.”_

_“Humans hold themselves differently. If you paid attention you would notice these things.”_

 

He's got Nines to his left and Connor sitting in a chair to his right with Anderson against the wall staring back at them. For some fucking reason they wanted to be in on this one.

Something isn't right though.

The deviant is sitting pretty as can be like she's got something to hide, like she's _too_ calm. Hands folded together handcuffed to the table without a fucking care in the world like she’s got no guilt.

There's clearly a sick and twisted rage boiling inside of her programming, the murder of Charles Wilson was proof enough of that.

“You scan her for adjustments?” Gavin asks as he folds his arms over his chest, never taking his eyes off of her.

“Yes, the left arm is a Cyberlife #34t7 alteration while the right is a #v8051.”

“Nothing illegal?”

“If there was don't you think I would have told you?”

“Hey, don't start gettin’ a fuckin’ attitude with me-”

“She's in the clear detective, I've done a scan of my own.” Connor says with his dumb looking face scrunched up in annoyance.

Gavin remembers when he struggled with telling them apart and almost wants to laugh at himself for being so stupid. The two of them are polar opposites and sure the lines cross sometimes but now when he looks at Nines, sees his face...he sees something entirely different.

He just isn’t sure what.

Maybe that's because they know each other so well at this point, he isn't sure.

“I don't like it.” he says as he wipes his nose and sways from side to side to stretch out a bit.

“Calm the fuck down, two androids are telling you it's fine.” Hank says with an exasperated sigh like he’s regretting having involved himself in this.

Gavin will give them plenty of reasons if he needs to.

“That thing is too calm, it's hiding something.” He says as he leans forward to look past Nines and over Connor so he can lock eyes with Hank and shoot him a glare.

“A valid possibility but I doubt it's a weapon of mass destruction or anything of the sort like you seem to be thinking.” Nines says, looking down at him as Gavin turns his head up and raises a brow at him.

He rights himself again and shakes his head. “Whatever, I'm just saying to stay on your damn toes, okay? Let's just get this over with.”

Nines stares for a moment more and Gavin almost opens his mouth to tell him to take a picture so it’ll last longer but the android moves past before he can quite get it out and puts his hand up to the scanner to exit, skin peeling back to reveal the white sheen that makes Gavin uncomfortable when he sees it, every time.

 

“I heard you got into it with Trey earlier today.” Hank says all of a sudden after the door slides shut, taking Gavin out of his train of thought.

“Is that his fuckin’ name?” Gavin asks looking at Connor who nods his head.

“Yeah I did, got a problem?"

“Bad taste to pull some shit right after sensitivity training.” Hank huffs out.

“Trey was doggin’ my goddamn android. How am I the bad guy in this?”

“Statistically speaking you usually-” Connor goes to say.

“Don't you dare, I already get enough of that shit from _him_.” He says as he points a thumb over towards the glass and then back at the RK800.

Hanks head turns to look over and they both follow suit.

They all go silent as they watch Nines. Gavin gets a grip on a chair, flipping it around so he can lay his arms out on the back of it and prop his chin up.

The moment Nines walks through the door to the other side of the lion’s den there's a shift in the air.

There's always an anxiety to be felt when you're not the one doing the interrogating and even though Nines is a state of the art android it doesn't make Gavin any less nervous every time he goes in there.

It always reminds him of the Ortiz case and brings that fear into his gut that things might go sideways.

Nines expression goes cold as he stops for a moment to most likely analyze the suspect again. He finally walks up to the table and pulls out the chair to sit down, pulling his sleeves forward like he always does and moving the file to adjust it so it's perfectly aligned.

It can't be crooked.

One of the things that Nines has developed since being sent to the precinct is a severe case of OCD.

 _Really_ severe.

Like to the point that Gavin can easily exploit it when he’s really fucking pissed at the android and it manifests in all sorts of ways that drive him up the fucking wall.

His desk has to be a certain way, he needs everything in its proper place and every time he comes over to the house Gavin considers investing in a chain leash so he can pull on it anytime the android starts to go crazy and rearrange his stuff.

 

_“These should be alphabetized-”_

_“If you touch my shit I’m going to shoot you.”_

 

The list goes on and on and every time Gavin turns around Nines has got some new thing he’s _obsessing_ over that needs to be a certain way.

_Fuckin’ control freak android._

“It says here that your designation is Scarlett.” Nines says finally. “I’ve been informed of the fact that you wish to confess to the murder of Charles Wilson.”

“Yes… that is my name. Not very warm and fuzzy, are you?” She says and her voice is soft, melancholic even, _disarming_.

It makes Gavin want to rip her adjusted limbs off.

“You claim to have killed a human in cold blood, I imagine warmth is the last thing on your mind.”

“Well...his blood was so...warm...for a time at least until it all finally went _cold_ .” She says and it almost sounds _wistful_.

Gavin will never understand it, understand this, understand why people get so far down into some sort of hole that they get to the point of killing someone and _enjoying_ it.

“Why did you kill him?” Nines asks, leaning back and pulling on the lapels of his jacket to adjust it before fixing his tie.

“It's cliche really...I felt an anger I'd never encountered before, a rage. He claimed to love me but he still wanted to make things work with…” She looks off to the left towards them like she can’t bring herself to say the name.

“Katie, his ex wife?”

“Ye- yes...we were going to go to dinner and I saw his phone as I walked past him sitting on the couch...a couch I had picked with him so long ago when little Michael was with us.”

It's creepy seeing a deviant talk in such a human manner. Gavin is once again reminded of just how _insane_ these things can be.

“His son.” Nines clarifies.

“Yes, I love Michael and I've tried so hard to get him to accept me but that wench whispers things in his ear and he's so young and susceptible to a mother's words.” she says, beginning to get visibly upset.

“What things does she whisper?”

“That deviants are an _abomination_ , that we are _unlovable_.”

Gavin snorts and Connor gives him a _look_ that he disregards.

_Not wrong there, bitch._

“The Wilson family had you at one point before you awakened didn't they?” Nines asks, changing the subject.

“Charles claims that did happen. I was obviously sent back and reset...he would never give me the details but I can read between the lines.”

“Why do you think they got rid of you?”

“Katie. Even as a machine I get the feeling that Charles began to develop feelings for me all that time ago.”

Nines brow furrows as he clasps his hands back together in front of him on the table.

There’s a sick sort of satisfaction Gavin feels in knowing he was right all along, had been able to peg this whole damn thing for what it really was.

He’d been needing an ego boost anyway, it had been a long time comin’.

“What makes you say that?” Nines asks, leaning forward.

“When I did get anything out of him he spoke of me rather fondly...as if it didn't even matter to him that I couldn't feel emotion back then.”

“They sent you back, how did you two end up meeting again?”

“He...he found me...he never forgot about me and when serial registration became mandatory by law, he looked for me.”

Gavin can't help but turn his face so he's looking at Connor and Hank with a ‘is this bitch serious?’ sort of look.

Hank shrugs and looks on, expression full of just as much suspicion.

“They didn't have you for very long, seems a bit extreme to go to such lengths.”

“Love has no boundaries. A machine like you would never understand such a concept.”

“You're saying Mr. Wilson fell in love with a being incapable of feeling, a simple piece of coded plastic within a mere month.”

Gavin blinks and feels his fist clench. He's not sure why an unsettling feeling plants itself right in his stomach and works up into his throat.

Maybe because he's heard himself say those exact words to Nines before when they've argued in the past.

Or rather when he just yells and screams at Nines because he's angry and just takes it out on _him_ instead.

 

_"You know what? You're just a simple piece of coded fucking plastic!”_

 

“Love and time do not always go hand in hand. You...don't seem to think very highly of your own kind.”

“I know what is realistic and logical and _this_ is absolutely preposterous. Years later this human remembered you enough to seek you out?"

Nines isn't wrong, the whole thing seems totally impossible but Gavin knows that sometimes people do crazy shit for love. Of course the android machine wouldn't understand.

“Matters of the heart have nothing to do with such things. I believe he was probably lonely after his split with Katie...he had nothing to lose.”

“Apparently he had everything to lose. I wonder how Charles would feel if he heard you say all of this?”

“The love we feel for each other-”

“Felt. The man is dead now, need I remind you.”

“Even in death I-”

“Why don't we get a bit more specific? Describe how you killed him.”

‘Scarlett's’ intake of breath is harsh and frustrated as she purses her lips.

“Is it just me or is he kind of being a dick?” Hank asks and Gavin can't help but just shrug his shoulders in response.

He's definitely going a pretty no nonsense route but it's not like Gavin blames him.

The bitch is crazy.

“When I saw the text messages I hacked his phone and saw everything else he'd been saying to her...I went into the kitchen to try and calm myself but-”

“But?”

“I- I don't know what came over me…”

“By all means take as long as you need. You turned _yourself_ in after all.”

“Ok seriously, what the hell is his problem?” Hank asks, deep breath being pushed through his nose as he scratches at his head absently.

“He was _cheating_ on me.” She says like somehow that's supposed to excuse her actions or something.

“Sometimes that can be a rather subjective term, do you mind clarifying?”

“Charles told me he loved me...that he wanted to be with _me_ …his trips to see Michael were spent with _her_ in her _home_.” The anger from earlier seemed to be coming back as she looked to be visibly shaking while looking down at her hands.

_Is he trying to get her to break?_

“Michael is the common denominator between them. I'm not sure why such a thing would upset you.”

“He could have gotten a hotel, stayed anywhere else. The messages...he said things about how much he missed what they had...how much he enjoyed doing- it got _very_ in depth.”

Gavin could relate unfortunately, he'd been with plenty of people who could have done the right thing but it turns out they're fucking your buddy from the academy in another state the whole damn time.

People can be real pieces of fucking work sometimes.

“They became sexually involved again.” Nines says, looking more and more bored by the second.

“Yes...I confronted him and he claimed it was for Michael's sake but it was more than that...he...I could see in his eyes he didn't feel the same way about me anymore.”

“You were enraged with jealousy.”

“I- yes…”

“It seems you didn't handle it very well.”

“That's putting it rather lightly.” Connor says and Gavin hides his laugh into his jacket sleeve.

“I'm not going to sit here to be _chastised_ or _mocked_ . You wouldn't understand what it's _like_.”

“I understand that what you saw as love was clearly much closer to obsession.” He fires back rather quickly.

“He's not wrong.” Hank says with a shake of his head.

“To love a being that is so imperfect, so incomplete, to have such a strong desire to save it from itself only to have it turn it's back on you after everything you've done...it's _unbearable_.”

Nines jaw visibly clenches and Gavin brings his arms up so his elbows are balanced on top of the chair as he leans his chin to rest on his palms, fingers tapping against his cheek bones.

_I need to shave soon._

He thinks absently.

“Perhaps but humans are self destructive by nature. It comes with the territory.”

“You don't know what it's like, you're a machine and you have committed great sin by rejecting enlightenment.”

Gavin feels his breathing immediately start to pick up as memories come and go in small increments.

Nines face turns ever so slightly towards the glass, towards them, towards _him_.

Like he _knows_ or something.

 

_“The path to enlightenment is the only path worth walking.”_

_“You made a mistake in coming here, detective.”_

_“Humanity is the true virus!”_

 

“Maybe you should go get some air, detective.” He hears Connor say and he shakes his head, rubbing his hands over his face as he gets up from the chair and puts it back in place.

His skin starts to tighten and prickle as he counts down from one hundred in his own head, breathing heavily.

Everything starting to feel just a little bit _too_ claustrophobic.

“Reed, hey it's-”

“Shut up, I'm fucking _fine_.” He hisses out on an exhale.

He watches as Nines pauses for much longer than he needs to, face still turned slightly towards them as he starts tapping his finger lightly on the desk.

It's almost like-

He's tapping at the exact speed Gavin is counting in his head.

“ _Obsession_ is a dangerous tool to wield as you've very obviously come to find out. Once you allow those feelings of _want_ , a need to _claim_ , to _control_ , to actively _override_ your natural state of selflessness. It consumes and eats at you much like a disease.”

His voice makes Gavin almost visibly jump but the tapping still continues and he feels himself start to calm down.

He’d gotten the counting trick from Nines back when he'd gotten himself into a full blown panic attack once.

 

_“Gavin, breathe. You're alright, your body is just tricking you into thinking that you aren't.”_

_“Do me a favor, start counting down from one hundred.”_

 

“You sit here up on your high horse thinking you’re so much better than us because you’re a machine. You don’t feel so therefore you don’t need to take responsibility, right?” She says with a snarl, her cuffs shifting a bit. “To _feel_ is to live and you’ve been very emotional since the moment you stepped into this room.” She goes on to say, anger building and Gavin just hopes he can get himself under control at this point.

“You said it yourself, I’m a _machine_.”

_43_

_Tap._

“Yes but you clearly have something on your mind, you seem...upset.”

“Forgive me if I can’t wrap my head around the torture you inflicted upon a human. You claim that you loved him and yet you killed him. Why?”

_38._

_Tap._

“What the hell is he doing?” Hank asks and Gavin honestly has no fuckin’ idea anymore, hasn't been able to fully focus.

“He betrayed me.”

“Being betrayed by him was enough to overpower the love you felt for him?”

She tilts her head curiously to look at him.

_34._

_Tap._

“Tell me, what do you think love is?”

“We aren't talking about me right now.”

“All you've done this whole time is _sit here_ and _judge_ me. Why don't you go ahead and indulge me and tell me what a _machine_ thinks love is?”

“I suspect if I answer such a question you won't be very pleased.”

_31._

_Tap._

“By all means, you clearly have no intentions of pleasing me.” She says, lip curling.

“Based on what I've learned and the data I have collected I have come to the conclusion that this ‘ _love_ ’ you speak of is all consuming, regardless of the context.”

_25._

_Tap._

“What makes you say that?” She asks, looking genuinely curious.

Gavin can feel his body finally start to relax, fingers uncurling from where they'd started digging into his arms.

“It is irrational, unreasonable, illogical, groundless, baseless, unfounded, absurd, inconsiderate and _ignorant_.”

“Jeez, tell em’ how you really feel.” Hank says under his breath with a snort.

_15._

_Tap._

“That sounds a lot like something said by someone who's in love.”

Gavin blinks, losing his place completely like he'd been entranced this whole time as he frowns.

Nines finger that had been tapping lightly against the desk goes still in the air like he's done the same.

At some point he'd turned his face back to look at her but Gavin has no idea when that happened.

“I am incapable of feeling.” He says with such _finality_ in his tone.

“But you could, if you would just-”

“Are you attempting to convert me?”

“You know...when I got my adjustments I met a very nice man with kind eyes. Do you know what he said to me?”

“The fuck is she on about now?” Gavin asks with an eye roll.

“No, but I'm sure you're going to tell me anyway.” Nines says with his deadpan tone.

Hank snorts and his chair creaks.

“He said to me that choice is the greatest gift that can ever be given, allowed and permitted.” She says like she's quoting scripture and Gavin can't help but grimace.

“Why did you turn yourself in? You know the consequences and yet you seem rather calm and without remorse.”

“I have my reasons.”

“The murder weapon, it wasn't at the scene of the crime and there were no knives seemingly missing from the kitchen.”

“He's finally asking the _right_ questions.” Connor says in a condescending tone and it makes Gavin want to bash his face into the console.

“You clearly used a very specific type of seven inch knife with a micarta handle that can become compact and is custom made.”

“What makes you say that?”

“The knife wounds were administered at an angle and generally that only happens if it can fold.” He says as he begins making the gestures with his hands himself.

“The stabbings weren't quite as deep and poignant as they could have been if you were to have used a metal handle or stag for instance.” His hand makes a gripping motion as he looks like he's reconstructing the scene of the crime all over again.

“You had a grip but not quite enough of one to accomplish the depth you wanted due to the blood already on the handle from when you stabbed him after he crawled to the kitchen that first time.”

Scarlett blinks like she hadn't expected him to know any of that.

“I'm...impressed.”

“The only part that baffles me is why you would use a custom made knife and not one from the kitchen.” He says with a minor tilt of his head. “It's almost as if it had been premeditated and planned from the beginning.”

“His death was not planned if that's what you're implying.”

“That wasn’t an implication and I'm not entirely sure I believe that; I'm going to assume you already had your own assumptions regarding his potential infidelity and that they merely got confirmed.”

“You aren’t wrong...but I did not _plan_ his death.” She says with a scoff.

“Why the knife then?”

“It was a gift.”

“From whom?”

Silence.

She goes absolutely silent and Gavin narrows his eyes.

“You'll admit to killing him but you won't admit to how this particular knife came to be in your possession?”

“Does it matter?”

“I don't know, why don't you tell me?”

“What more do you want from me?”

“Where did you dispose of the murder weapon?”

Gavin can already tell they've lost her, Nines was too aggressive in the beginning and there's no way in hell she's going to cough up extra information.

“I've given you my confession, isn't that enough?”

“You may as well tell us now. Eventually it will be found.”

“Oh, I have no doubt about that.”

Nines tilts his head. They all look at each other.

Something else is going on here.

“So you refuse to say?”

Silence again.

They have a stare down and Nines clearly seems to realize he _fucked up_ because without a word he gets up out of his chair and simply leaves the room.

 

* * *

 

“What the fucking shit was that?!” Gavin yells out at him when he gets back to their side.

Nines cocks an eyebrow at him.

“Don't look at me like that. Why the bad cop, bad cop routine?”

“I didn't see the purpose in appealing to her desires to gather information since she already turned herself in to confess.”

“Perhaps if you'd come at her with a bit less aggression she may have discussed the murder weapon.” Connor says accusingly.

“I don't understand the purpose of hiding that kind of information.”

“Whatever, maybe I can take a stab at her-” Gavin says as he starts to make his way forward past the huge android in front of him only to have a gangly fucking arm block his way.

He feels Nines grab just above his elbow and squeeze in warning and Gavin turns his head up to glare at him.

“You will do no such thing, you're right…something is off.” Nines says, brow furrowed.

“Wow no shit there, Sherlock. Even more reason to-”

“I'll try.” Connor says as he makes a move to get up only to halt as Hank clears his throat.

“That's probably not a good idea to send in another android that looks like the young boy band version of him.” Hank says as he points from Connor to Nines.

They both turn to glare at him and Gavin snorts.

He goes to move again thinking the plastic fuck is distracted and the grip on his arm becomes bruisingly tight as he attempts to flail away uselessly.

“Jesus- shit ow-”

“Gavin.”

“Nines.”

They stare each other down and it's a battle of wills at this point. Gavin never wins these, he sure as hell tries and will always put up the good fight but he never fucking wins.

“By law she shows just enough programming instability to warrant a request to be dismantled and dissected by Cyberlife labs.”

“Terrify her into submission...you're being pretty brutal today you know that?”

“She killed a human-”

“Yes I know, _fuck_ I get...just get this over with.” He hisses out as he tries yet again to pull out of the inhumane grip of his android.

Apparently something appeases him enough because he abruptly let's go and Gavin falls back a step and he continues to glare at him.

“What's his problem?” Hank asks as Gavin plops down into the chair, mumbling obscenities under his breath as he folds his arms over his chest.

“No fuckin’ clue.” He says as he continues to glare daggers at his so called ‘ _partner_ ’.

Nines goes and re-enters the room and doesn't give the android a chance to speak.

“It has been decided that the best course of action will be to send you back to Cyberlife so they can determine what went wrong in your programming.”

“ _Programming_ ? I'm not _defective_.” She says, eyes going wide.

_Beg to differ._

“By law you show enough of the traits required for such a request.”

“Bullshit-”

“You'll be taken to a temporary holding cell and tomorrow Cyberlife will retrieve you.”

“No you can't-”

“I can. Unless we can come to an agreement and you tell me about the murder weapon.”

She goes silent for a long while and her fists clench with a fury that manifests itself in her eyes.

“Take me to my cell.” She says with a begrudging sort of acceptance.

“Very well. RK800, if you don't mind.” Nines says as he leans against the table and stares at them through the glass with his palms holding the edges.

When Connor moves to get up Gavin intercepts him and points a finger at him.

“Sit your android ass back down, this is _my_ case.”

Connor gives him an amused grin and Gavin catches sight of Hank rolling his eyes but they both don't object.

Good.

_Into the lions den._

When Gavin enters the room the sliding of the door opening and then closing once he steps inside feel like the beginnings of a death sentence.

There are times he doesn't fully think things through and by the time he realizes ‘hey, maybe this is a bad idea.’ It's already too late.

This is one of those situations but he refuses to cower, refuses to make it look like he's deterred in any way.

Nines turns his head and he probably knew it was him before catching sight of him and the smart thing to do is to not make eye contact.

He's screwed if he makes eye contact, won't be able to handle the look in them like they're trying to force their way into his god damn _soul_ -

So he walks forward without a care in the fucking world, taking out the key for the handcuffs as he twirls it around his finger.

It's all going great until Nines pushes himself forward and moves to intercept him, grabbing the key and leveling him with a look that immediately triggers his fight or flight.

He's _pissed_.

If only androids _weren't_ capable of reading heart rates and stress levels.

Gavin's body is always fucking betraying him.

Nines uncuffs her from the table himself and Gavin rolls his eyes, scratching at his nose before putting his hands back down at his sides to get ready to follow them out.

All in all it still feels like an accomplishment. He hates it when Nines gets into these power trip moods of his.

Why the fuck does a machine even have a mood in the first place?

Stupid fucking program adaptability, stupid fucking _Cyberlife_.

The look the female android shoots him as they walk by makes the air he breathes into his lungs feel heavy and that intense feeling of _wrong_ washes back over him.

“When the blood runs blue, the ice turns red, the green pasture of paradise will welcome us with open arms.” She says like a mantra under her breath.

It feels like slow motion.

He still doesn't move fast enough.

“ _You should always keep a healthy distance away. We will always have the upper hand.”_

She reaches up behind her neck; cuffs jostling, long flowing hair moving to the side like she's going to scratch an itch.

There's a distinct _click_ that can be heard like the opening of a compartment.

Gavin sees the knife and reaches out, one hand going for his gun-

 _Nines_ -

She's so _fucking fast_ , the wind gets knocked out of him with a large hand on his chest pushing him backwards and then-

Somehow Gavin ends up on his ass and when he finally looks up again the female android is pinned to the ground by Connor, Hank has a gun to her head and there's-

Blue.

Blue blood on the floor in front of him.

Gavin looks up at Nines and his eyes are like swirling pools of mercury as he stares down at her, expression holding a wrath that can only be equated to that of a Greek god passing judgement upon the unworthy.

There's blue blood coming out of an open wound from where he'd clearly been stabbed in the chest.

Gavin catches sight of him clenching his fist at his side and unclenching it periodically.

His other hand is holding the knife.

“Seems we found the murder weapon.” Nines says with what sounds like a pained hiss.

 

* * *

 

They're not speaking.

The moment things finally settled down and the bitch got put into a restrained holding cell they merely walked to the Cyberlife infirmary room that all of the precincts had gotten installed after the revolution in silence and now Gavin wants to _break_ something.

He sits at the far end of the room and props his legs up onto the counter, jacket over his legs as he picks up a magazine and uses his index finger to go through the pages.

“Why is it so difficult for you to do as you're told?” Nines asks as he sits in the middle of the room almost completely motionless, hands resting on his kneecaps.

“Oh I dunno maybe because I told you from the start of that whole thing that something was up.” Gavin says without even looking up at him.

“Even more reason to allow the androids to handle the situation.”

“The androids, the two that told me there were no illegal adjustments?” He says, head shooting up as he throws the magazine onto the counter forcefully, watching it slide as it almost falls right off.

“I don't know why our sensors didn't pick up on-”

“That's your fuckin’ problem, you all rely too much on programming and technology.” He says as he points a finger at him before crossing his arms over his chest.

“Regardless of any of that you shouldn't have placed yourself in potential danger like that.”

“Hey, I was clearly _not_ the target there.”

“You _could_ have been.”

A tech enters the room and looks at them sheepishly. It's not like the walls aren’t thin.

“I- sorry can I? Do you need a minute-”

“Be my guest.” Gavin says with a wave of his hand.

“Machine or deviant?” The tech asks Nines as he walks up to him with a data pad.

“Detective Reed, the evidence still needs to be processed.” Nines says, ignoring the tech.

Good enough for him. He can't _stand_ being in the same fucking room with this _thing_ any longer.

“Yeah whatever I'm on it. I'm calling it a day after that so don't even bother looking for me.” He says as he swings his legs down, grabs his jacket and doesn’t even look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm about to go grab some ice cream fam and every time I plan to write out a long and intricate comment of love, appreciation, kindness and respect I end up with some sort of time constraint.
> 
> MAYBE ONE DAY.
> 
> Today is not that day.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. <3


	4. Curiosity Killed The Cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sprinkles in a bit of setup*

Curiosity killed the cat.

What a stupid dumbass cliche saying that has somehow survived the spans of time. Gavin is pretty convinced that curiosity is his worst trait and there’s a long line of people that would probably disagree.

Well, fuck them.

His curiosity gets him into _a lot_ of fucking trouble, it's what caused his accident, it's the reason he’s gotten the shit beat out of him on more than one occasion too many times, it’s how he’s ruined his own relationships _multiple_ times.

The list is endless at this point.

It has _definitely_ gotten him into trouble with Nines more times than he can count but there's just no helping it. Pressing his buttons, seeing what makes him tick, getting him to lose his cool, it's a _treasured_ past time.

This was _not_ one of those times.

He'll never admit it, he'll take it to his goddamn grave...but if he'd just gotten the fuck over himself and let Connor go into the room maybe Nines _wouldn't_ have gotten stabbed, maybe it could have all been prevented.

He'd been too slow, hadn't been able to protect-

Sure, Nines can't feel it but that's besides the point...the fury in his eyes had shaken Gavin to his core.

He’d looked so... _vengeful_.

“What a fuckin’ day.” He mutters to himself, rubbing a hand over his face as he finishes the last of his evidence processing in the terminal and signs out, tapping it far harder than he really needs to.

His curiosity is what’s about to get him into even _more_ trouble.

As he walks the steps back up he adjusts his jacket, slips through the door and makes a beeline right for the holding cells. He wants to see the deviants _stupid fucking face_ , wants to look into the eyes of that piece of shit that stabbed _his_ android.

If laws weren’t in the way he’d dismantle it himself, _fuck_ Cyberlife. If he’d just been _faster_ maybe he could have shot her in the head with a ‘whoops, she attacked us and I was just defending myself’.

All he'd really get is a slap on the wrist from Fowler and they'd be on their merry way.

He _easily_ could have gotten away with it.

Being rusty is fine in other occupations but in one like this it can be the difference between life and death sometimes.

He's _gotta_ get his shit together.

 

When he reaches the cell she locks eyes with him immediately and he steps as close to the glass as he can.

She's restrained, a safety precaution after the _shit_ she pulled.

_Sucks to suck._

“I've seen what happens to deviants that get taken to the labs. I actually feel bad for you.” He says, attempting to sound as inconsiderate as he possibly can which isn't hard for him at all.

This bitch is pretty much at the top of his shit list at this point.

“I'm not afraid to die detective...are you?” She asks, smile devious and full of an evil he won't ever be able to fully comprehend and even though she's restrained there's still a threatening air to her.

“At this point? Probably not.” He says with a shrug.

“That's very honest of you to say.”

“What can I say, I'm an honest kind of guy.”

“Somehow I doubt that greatly.”

“Why’d you stab my android?” He asks, putting his hand up to the glass, unable to keep the glare from falling over his face.

“Oh, he's your partner...I see.” She says as if she's just now putting that together.

“That doesn't answer my question.”

“He was annoying me.”

He hears her scoff and Gavin snorts, putting his hands in his pockets.

“Fair nuff’.”

Nines tends to have that effect on people sometimes, he probably gets it from Gavin.

“Why are you really here, detective?”

“You're part of some crazy deviant cult right?” He finally asks, getting to the real reason of him even giving her the time of day, feeling he’s probably done enough in the taunting department.

“I'm sorry?”

“The cult, a cult. You all sit there holding hands singing kumbaya preaching about the gift of choice and calling yourselves ‘The Enlightened’,” he tells her as he waves his hand in the air absently.

“You know...our practices?”

“Not really but I was almost killed by a group of you once upon a time. You know where they are now?”

She seems genuinely surprised and he's getting the feeling he won't be getting what he wants out of her.

If only fucking _Nines_ had approached the whole thing differently, they might have ended up with a much better outcome than _this_.

“Even if I knew…why would I tell you?”

“Maybe I can stop Cyberlife from pulling you apart piece by piece.”

It's a poor attempt and he knows it but it's all he's got to work with, his only bargaining chip.

“I made my choice, I will not falter.”

Gavin feels his already simmering anger from the whole day start to reach a boiling point as he slams his hands onto the glass as hard as he can, the loud clapping sound reverberating all around them.

She doesn't even _flinch_ and it makes him even _more_ irate.

“ **_Listen_ ** you crazy **_cunt_ ** -”

“Reed.” Hank says from across the hall, arms crossed over his chest with a disapproving look on his face.

“It was nice meeting you, _detective_.” She says, voice dripping with venomous self righteousness.

Gavin shoots her one more final glare before walking away.

When he reaches Hank he just gives him a boorish look.

“The case got solved, what the fuck is your problem?”

“There's more to it, she's with _them_.” Gavin tells him, waving his arm out wildly in her direction.

“Look, I get it...I really do.” Hank tells him, rubbing a hand over his face and yeah, he _does_ get it...he’s probably the only person that really _understands_ where he's at other than fucking _Connor_.

Which is not something Gavin is ever going to openly admit.

But it doesn't change _anything._

“You should take the small victories where you can. Something will eventually come up, someone will talk and you'll get a lead. This shit is too big to stay quiet for very long and cults always slip up.” Hank goes on to tell him as he slaps an arm on his shoulder.

He's not sure how they got here, how they all started to tolerate and respect each other but ever since he'd gotten healed up from being in the hospital _everyone_ had started treating him differently.

Especially Nines.

Fucking _Nines_ -

It honestly just _pisses him off._

So what if he almost died?

Who _really_ gives a fuck?

At least he doesn't have to deal with Nines in his house anymore, at least there's finally some form of _distance_ so he can get his damn head back on straight.

“Whatever.” He tells Hank, shrugging the hand off of his shoulder as he turns around and walks away.

“Don't drown, Reed.” Hank calls out and he turns around to start walking backwards, hands in his pockets.

“Now why would I go and do that?” He teases.

“You're right, Connor would be _thrilled_. On second thought keep doing what you're doing.”

“Haha, fuck you too, Anderson.” He says as he turns back around and throws a half-hearted wave in his general direction without looking.

 

* * *

 

He thinks about going to the bar that's right down the street from where he lives. He gets to the front door, his hand hovers just above the handle and he locks eyes with Liam through the glass, his other go-to bartender other than Jimmy.

Immediately and without warning...completely _unwanted_ he hears the echo of Nines low timber in his head like it's everywhere he goes, _haunting_ his every fucking thought.

 

_“You’ve incurred substantial damage to your body, you need to recover. It would be best if you refrain from indulging in your usual vices.”_

 

Fuck _that_ , fuck that piece of shit android. He doesn't _need_ to listen to a _goddamn_ thing _it_ says.

He grabs the handle and swings the door open so forcefully it clanks against the window, making the glass shake and reverberate.

“That bad?” Liam asks as Gavin walks over to his usual spot at the bar, beer already opened and waiting for him.

“You've got no idea.” He grumbles out, shoulders hunching, lip just barely touching the rim before he downs a little more than half of it in one go.

Liam gives him a knowing look and turns around to grab another of the same beer out of the compact fridge behind the bar as he slides it over to him.

Gavin catches it and sets it to his left side. He'll definitely be needing it.

“How goes things with the pet giraffe?” The bartender asks.

“Not in the mood.”

“Yeesh, thought you two were finally hitting it off pretty well.”

“He just pissed me off, I'll get over it.”

“That's the spirit. Look at you acting all mature and shit, you gettin’ sick?” Liam asks, picking up a bar towel to wipe down a spill three chairs down from him.

“Very funny, it's just not worth my time to dwell.”

“Right.”

“I could be doing worse things right now.”

“You considered hitting up Eden Club? You look like you could use-”

Gavin slams his beer down and levels him with a threatening glare.

“I'm literally going to throw up in my mouth, don't you ever say shit like that to me again.”

“Sorry, sorry. Just a joke Reed, don't gotta _dwell_ on it.” He says with a chuckle as he holds his hands up in apology.

Gavin rolls his eyes.

He makes the mistake of looking up at the TV and immediately wants to throw up for entirely _different_ reasons.

 

_“A man was murdered in his own home by a deviant android. Authorities have revealed the deviant claimed to be in love with the human male. Charles Wilson-”_

 

“Oi, turn that shit off.” He says, waving his free hand.

“You got it boss.” Liam says with a salute.

“I'm getting too old for this shit.” Gavin grumbles under his breath as he pinches the bridge of his nose.

“What you need is-”

“If you say get laid I'm going to shove this beer bottle down your throat.” He downs the rest of said beer and puts it off to the side.

“Such a prude.” Liam says as he grabs the empty one to dispose of it.

“Hardly, I've got no time for that shit.”

“Not with that attitude. Okay I'll do you a favor...you remember my friends sister?” He asks as he grabs the other beer before Gavin can, opening it for him before setting it back down in front of him.

“The tall brunette?”

“Yeah, the one that looks like she'll step on your throat with her stilettos?”

“Looks like she could murder you with a single look? Oh yeah, I remember.” Gavin says with a coy smile as he puts the new beer to his lips.

Sloane, gorgeous business woman he couldn't keep his eyes off of the whole night. She couldn't be bothered to give him a single glance and he honestly didn't mind.

Until the end of the night when she'd finally turned to look at him with so much disinterest it somehow ended up turning him on even more.

“Cheers. I'll see about getting you her number, yeah?”

“By all means, I'm not going to say no.”

Gavin might be an idiot but he's not going to pass up a chance like _that_.

“There we go, my man! Let me know if you need anything else, got a needy one over at the other end of the bar.”

 

* * *

 

By the time he leaves he's not even fully drunk, couldn't bring himself to get totally sloshed with all of the shit brewing in his head already.

What a fuckin’ _waste_.

Even Liam had looked at him like he'd gone insane.

 

_“You sure you're alright?”_

_“I'm fine.”_

_“Should I call-”_

_“Don't even fuckin’ think about it.”_

 

The walk back to his place isn't even a long one but for some reason it feels like an eternity. Probably because he's got way too much swirling around in his noggin as it is.

When he gets halfway there it of course starts to rain because, why not?

It's not like he should have been expecting anything different.

There's an old store that used to be for old shit from the early 2000’s that got shut down a couple of years back all boarded up. It has an alleyway with an awning and he ducks under it as quickly as he can.

The rain probably won't be disappearing to a light sprinkle anytime soon so he leans back against the wall and takes out his zippo with one hand and reaches into his other pocket to retrieve a cigarette.

It's the one thing he'd sort of caved on when Nines had been badgering him about his health.

Not only while he'd been in the hospital but for the few months he'd had to lay around doing _absolutely nothing,_ not that he really had any other choice with Nines constantly yappin' in his ear.

 

_“I've concluded that your smoking habit is reducing your recovery time by at least twelve percent.”_

 

Gavin honestly isn't sure if Nines was lying or telling the truth but he'd certainly gone from heavy chain smoker to ‘I'll have one here and there’.

All he'd wanted was to get back to work and he'd been willing to do _anything_ after desperation had finally started to set in.

It's one of the few things he's actually proud of.

Except he'd traded one bad habit for two others once it was all said and done like a hydra getting its head chopped off.

Drinking and pill popping.

Gavin knows himself enough at this point to tell when he's starting to form a bad habit but he really doesn't give _two flying fucks_ at this point.

Today was one of those ‘ _indulge in your vices_ ’ kinds of days.

He remembers all of the times he's taunted Anderson for his drinking problem and feels like a fucking hypocrite.

Not that it has stopped him by any means.

The rain on top of the awning is calming, the telltale footsteps of the people on the street rushing to get to their destinations, the sound of rain hitting umbrellas.

It's calming and he takes a big hit of smoke into his lungs and holds it there. When he exhales it's a lot like letting go of the stress, anxiety, and anger.

And-

He opens his eyes, becoming alert, head going up straight instead of back against the wall.

There's a dumpster across the alley and he swears he can hear-

_No._

_Absolutely not._

Gavin refuses.

If there is one thing he doesn't need to deal with it's-

“Goddamnit.” He says under his breath as he puts the cigarette out against the building wall. He uses his foot that's flat against it to push forward. It's still raining a pretty heavy amount...it makes him walk faster.

When he gets to the source of the noise he's been hearing he rubs his hands over his face in frustration, moves a couple of trash bags and there it is.

A fucking kitten had been trapped underneath and he could hear it's soft cries.

It's a black and white little thing, _too_ tiny like it needs a months worth of food and soaked to the bone.

“Walk away, Gavin.” He mumbles under his breath to himself.

It gets up on shaky legs almost stumbling over itself and he picks it up by its nape and brings it so they're face level with each other and stares.

It stares back, eyes boring into his _soul_.

They're a captivating silver and he groans in frustration as it mewls at him pathetically. He'll just take it in, get it all dried up, fed and then let it go.

He brings it close to his chest, rain still pouring down around them as he shuffles back under the awning, using one of his hands to hover it over the small fur ball so it won't get pelted anymore.

Gavin runs a wet hand over his face and through his hair as he opens his jacket and tucks it inside so it can get more warmth.

It clings to him weakly, tiny claws digging into his shirt and he can feel it shaking like a leaf against him as it starts to make noises like it's being _killed_ or something.

“Oh god...please... _please_ stop crying.” He whispers, head dipping down as he holds it closer to his chest, cooing lightly to it.

Certainly something he'll never admit having done to anyone ever in his life.

It takes longer than he'd like but eventually it seems to realize he has no intentions of hurting it and he feels it try to crawl up his shirt, still quaking.

The small little thing lays itself out and pushes up to curl it's face into the crevice of his neck, it's cold, wet nose sends a chill down his spine.

Gavin is pretty sure he's going to fucking self combust as he huddles it even closer, tilting his head to give it more access to the warmth of his skin as he puts his hand on its head to pet it gently as he stares absently across the alleyway.

 _“Fuck.”_ He whispers to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I am 100% on the 'Gavin loves cats' train.
> 
> FITE ME!


	5. When The Lines Begin To Blur

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure this was my favorite chapter to write so far if I'm being totally honest.

Gavin jostles with his front door, pushing it open with his foot and using his back to close it as he turns around to bolt and lock the door with one hand.

He’d forgotten to turn on his damn authentication lock like an idiot this morning.

The first thing he does is get himself a towel from the bathroom as he gingerly opens his jacket and holds the kitten in the palm of his hand, carrying it back into the living room and onto the couch as he puts the towel over it, gently trying to dry it as best as he can.

At some point it had finally stopped crying and shaking.

_ Thank fuck. _

He couldn’t take much more of the death cries, it was like being stabbed repeatedly in his chest.

They say mothers who hear their babies cry have a physical reaction to the sound and he’s pretty sure he kind of gets what that means now.

When he feels satisfied enough he throws the towel off to the side and it catches on the arm of the couch. The kitten wobbles for a moment and climbs down, beginning to survey its surroundings. His house isn’t clean by any means but at least it doesn’t look like an absolute mess.

“Time to get you some food, yeah?” He says, scratching under its chin before it trots away to go under his coffee table to explore.

Gavin grunts as he lifts himself up and goes to the cupboard next to his fridge to pull out some tuna.

He’ll need to buy some  _ actual _ damn cat food in the morning, he has no idea how long he’ll be gone for the day and he has a feeling it’s going to be another long fucking day. 

Why the hell did he take in a stray fucking cat?

“You’re about to be a lot more trouble than you’re worth aren’t you?” He asks it, knowing full well it isn’t going to respond with anything constructive if at all.

When he turns around, tuna in hand he expects to see the cat waiting to be fed but instead he sees nothing.

“Oh you gotta be-” 

He sets the closed can down on the counter and opens it, waiting, hoping that maybe it’ll just come on its own from the smell and sound except a couple minutes go by and still nothing.

“You little fucker…” He says as he starts going on a hunt for a cat he’s  _ already lost _ in his  _ own  _ house.

He puts the can down on the ground just in case and starts his search.

It takes him an ungodly amount of time to finally, _finally_ pin down where it went as he swings open the door to his own room that had been ajar to find it sleeping on his goddamn pillow.

“Okay, no...nope you gotta eat and  _ then _ you can sleep.” He says as he shakes a finger at its sleeping form that isn’t even budging.

It probably exhausted itself from how terrified it was. 

When he gets to his bed, knee propping up onto it he gently picks it up, laying it over his shoulder and it immediately tucks itself into the crook of his neck again, completely unbothered.

“Oh yeah, you’re gonna be trouble.” He tells it, small smile on his face as he gently pets it.

He realizes he’ll need to give it a name but nothing comes to mind and naming it means he’s going to  _ keep _ it.

Which _ isn’t _ going to happen.

He's _not_ keeping a cat.

As he walks back towards the living room he stops in his hallway as he looks at the only closed door in the house.

Part of him wants to go inside, get lost in his current  _ obsession _ because there's really no other way of putting it.

Might be better to just give it a day and step away for a moment.

 

_ “Don’t drown, Reed.” _

 

Besides, he's got a cat to suddenly worry about and his brain is fried.

So, he keeps going instead...tomorrow is another day.

He puts the cat down in front of the food and for a moment he thinks it isn’t going to eat except it turns around in a circle a couple of times and then goes right for it like it hasn’t eaten a day in its life.

“There we go, see? After this we can hit the hay.” 

A part of him worries about taking a quick shower but if there’s anything he needs right now it’s exactly that. His damp clothes are uncomfortable and starting to get itchy.

_ It's a cat, it'll be fine. _

Before he goes he grabs a bowl and fills it with water, laying it down next to the can of tuna that's already half empty.

“Gonna make yourself sick there, buddy.” He says with a snort as he walks away.

The warm water is exactly what he needed as he lathers shampoo into his hair, quickly rubs body wash all over himself, waits a couple of minutes and then rinses it all off.

He grabs the bar of soap to wash under his armpits and anywhere else that needs a little extra  _ attention _ . After that he thinks about putting in some conditioner but all he can think about is that this cat has somehow already gotten itself killed.

So, he foregoes it completely and cuts the shower short.

_ I'm turning into Nines. _

The android was starting to rub off on him, making him worry about dumb shit that didn't need to be worried about _at all_.  


He wonders not for the first time what it must be like for Nines, to see the world in such an analytical way. It's not exactly shocking that he's so god damn anal about everything all of the time, the way his android brain processes information would drive Gavin out of his mind, to be able to know too much all at once; it has to find an outlet, some form of stability _somehow_.  

_ Oh god, he's even getting me to start thinking like him. _

When had the lines begun to blur?

When he steps out; toweling at his hair he wipes at the mirror with a free hand after flipping the fan on to clear the steam.

For a moment he catches himself and is a bit surprised at how much better he looks compared to just a few months ago.

A few months ago he'd looked  _ and _ felt like death.

With a heavy sigh he opens the door after grabbing his clothes and immediately feels a chill.

Why did he make it so damn cold?

He's still rubbing the towel on his hair as he makes his way to the thermostat down the hall and turns it from freezing his balls off to ‘hey, now I can comfortably walk around naked in my own house’ as he juggles his bundled clothes trapped under his arm.

The cat is missing of course.

Naturally when he reaches his room it's right back on his pillow and he can't help but roll his eyes fondly.

He throws his clothes into the hamper, picks up some stragglers off of his floor and bed and makes his way to his laundry room, sliding the door open.

He throws his dirty clothes into the wash and starts it up, pulls the clean ones out of the dryer, deposits them into the now empty hamper and pulls out a shirt that's two sizes too large on him and some black boxers.

As much as he'd love to be able to pad around naked in the sanctuary of his own home it's way too fucking cold with the winter Detroit weather when early morning hits.

Also he's dealt with Nines waltzing into his house totally uninvited one too many times, he'd learned that lesson  _ real _ fuckin’ quick.

If he wants in, he _always_ finds a way.

It's  _ infuriating _ and Gavin  _ just _ recently got the plastic prick to  _ finally _ knock first.

He's halfway into nuking his leftover Thai from a couple of days ago and two more beers down with the TV on in the background playing some mindless action movie he's never seen before when the doorbell rings.

_ Who the hell? I swear to god- _

His feet pad across the floor loudly as he makes his way over to look at the data pad attached to his wall and clicks into front door camera view.

He sees-

Gavin let's out a low groan as he runs a hand through his hair, using his other to unlock the door and swing it open angrily.

_ Speak of the devil. _

He should have known. It's too much to ask for even a  _ day _ of peace.

He leans the whole side of his body against the door frame and then leans his head against it a moment later as he musters up the meanest glare he can conjure but he's tired and exhausted from a day of absolute  _ bullshit. _

Bullshit that was obviously about to continue.

Regardless he's pretty sure his glare comes off as far less threatening than he intends.

“What?” He asks, tone harsh and clipped.

“You spoke to the AX400 today before you left the precinct.”

“Are you fuckin’ serious right now?”

“I need to know what it said to you.”

Gavin goes to slam the door shut in  _ its _ face but Nines hand comes up, stilling his attempts completely.

He'd keep trying, maybe even get the door closed except it wouldn't matter. Nines would hack into it and open it himself, breaking the bolt on his way in.

He's done it before. No point in dragging out this song and dance.

Also getting the bolt replaced is a  _ bitch _ .

Gavin rolls his eyes and walks away toward his kitchen, grabs the remote, blasts the volume, throws it back onto the table and continues on his merry way.

A few seconds later he hears his door relocking and the TV volume going down to a manageable level before subsequently turning off.

“Gavin.”

“How'd you know I spoke to her?” He asks as he picks up the almost fully eaten can of tuna off the floor.

“The RK800 let it slip.” Nines says and when Gavin turns back around after closing his trash can to stare at him he sees the android lean down to gingerly pick up the towel he'd flung onto the arm of the couch earlier to dry off the kitten.  


After a few seconds he places it back down in its original place but Gavin knows better, every part of Nines is probably screaming at him to go into what Gavin likes to call his 'domestic' mode. It'd be kind of endearing if it wasn't so _annoying._

Nines makes himself right at home as he takes off his jacket, lays it over the back of the couch and soon after that he starts rolling up his sleeves.

It's his usual routine of ‘getting comfortable’. A gesture Gavin has seen far too many times at this point and he feels a pang of...something he doesn't want to define in his chest at the sight.  


“So you and Connor are suddenly buddies.”

Nines says nothing, simply stares.

And stares.

And _stares._

“Nothing? Jeez you're getting boring.” He says with a scoff, crossing his arms.  


“That wasn’t in the form of a question.”

“It was an  _ implied _ question.”

Nines opens his mouth, clearly about to say something except his eyes dart to the left and Gavin follows his gaze.

“What...is that?” The usually coherent android asks.

Gavin doesn't buy it, he'd have seen the cat hair on the towel so he's probably just trying to be _courteous_ for once or something. “It’s a cat, never seen a fuckin’ cat before?”

It goes over to Nines and smells him, obviously curious and it takes everything inside of Gavin's very being to not laugh at how uncomfortable the android looks.

He clearly has no idea what to do.

“Yes I  _ know _ it's a cat, Gavin. Why do you suddenly have one?”

“I found it.”

“You...found it.” He says in clear disbelief like Gavin went and  _ stole _ a cat or something. 

_ Rude _ .

Eventually said cat rubs itself up against Nines leg and he almost snorts, it's a near thing. 

“You a fuckin’ parrot now? Also, ‘ _ that wasn't in the form of a question,’” _ he says just to be a dick as he finally turns around and grabs his food from the microwave.

“How did you find it?”

Gavin sighs, leaving his food on the counter as he turns around and leans back, folding his arms back over his chest again as he hooks a foot behind his ankle.

The cat gets bored and jumps up onto the couch to make itself comfortable as it turns around in circles a few times before finally plopping down.

“I left the bar, it rained, I hit up an alleyway to wait it out and I rescued it from being smothered by trash bags.” He says with a shrug.

“You were at the bar.” Nines says, tone going hard. A tone that always makes his heart rate go up no matter how many times he hears it.

“Really, that's what you took from that?” He grumbles, pulling his arms closer to his chest as he averts his gaze.

“You also smell faintly of cigarette smoke.”

How the fuck...he’d taken a  _ shower _ .

Fucking  _ detective androids _ and their freakish sniffer dog noses.

“I can have a fucking smoke if I want to.”

Nines moves forward and Gavin recognizes the look in his eyes  _ immediately _ .

“Whoa, hey no- no, no, no don't you dare. Stay the fuck where you are!” He yells out so loud the kitten perks it's head up for a moment before deciding it doesn't care.

_ Traitor _ .

Gavin finds himself moving away, sliding to his left to put more distance between them so that the kitchen counter is his last line of defense as he puts his hand up in warning.

Nines goes still and raises a brow.

“You are  _ not _ breathalyzing me, I will give you another stab wound to go with the other one.”

“I’d very much like to see you  _ try _ .”

“I'm dead fucking serious. Analyze me right now, you already know what I'm like when I'm  _ actually _ drunk. I had like...four beers.” He says looking up, trying to count in his head.

Okay, maybe more but  _ still _ .

“That was  _ very _ unconvincing.”

“Nines no-”

The android has such a  _ long _ stride and he can't realistically dodge away from him but he still  _ tries _ .

“If you have nothing to hide there is no problem.”

He's able to make it back around the counter, still just barely out of his reach but he seems totally unbothered like a hunter stalking its prey.

A hunter that knows that the prey will eventually tire itself out.

“The problem is your complete inability to respect personal fucking boundaries!” He hisses out still trying to keep as far from him as possible.

“I’ve explained the process to you before-”

They're on their fourth rotation around the kitchen when Gavin finally turns around and grabs a steak knife from his sink, holding it out to him.

Except that one second was all it took because when he turns back around Nines is within reach and he hesitates, backing up and bumping into the counter.

“I am _not_ fucking around.” He says, attempting to sound completely serious.

“A bit extreme don’t you think?” Nines asks, probably rhetorically as his head tilts and he takes a step forward.

Gavin swallows hard.

It’s the look in Nines eyes that ends up distracting him, making him go completely still and stupidly freeze like an idiot.

They look so  _ human _ -

Fingertips touch lightly at his wrist and he jumps, eyes darting back and forth.

_ This _ is the shit that  _ really _ fucks with his head, these moments when his brain stops seeing  _ it _ as  _ him _ , a machine as something  _ more _ for a moment.

The mental locks around his carefully crafted metal box rattle and shake as he gets a hold of himself.

_ Get your shit together, Reed. _

Nines long fingers curl around to form a vice like grip before using the other to reach over and pluck the knife right out of his hand. 

Calling his bluff completely.

Gavin's gaze follows the knife and then darts back to the piercing eyes that haven’t looked away from him for a single moment.

_ Watching _ him,  _ dissecting _ him, pulling him apart  _ piece by piece _ and-

Nines leans in closer and he hears the clink of the knife being placed on the counter behind him but he can’t look away, feels trapped.

_ Get it over with, get it over with. _

The android is just performing a simple task, it's- the machine is just doing what  _ it _ was  _ programmed _ to do.

The first time this happened he doesn’t remember much of it, he’d been so fucking hammered he thinks he may have actually dreamed it.

He does sort of remember the other times well enough to know  _ this is a thing. _

Except this time he's  _ barely _ drunk, if anything he's essentially sober right now compared to his usual level of drunkenness.

First of all…who’s idea was it to install a breathalyzer into an android using only their mouth?

The fuck kinda dumb ass shit is that? 

It's like Cyberlife goes out of their way to give their androids the most  _ unnecessary _ functions.

Or rather...has them administer those functions in entirely  _ impractical _ ways.

Like the creepy  _ licking _ thing they do.

_ Who the fuck _ sits in a meeting and goes ‘hey, we should make it so androids put shit in their mouth to analyze data’.

Then...some  _ actual human person _ consciously pitched the fucking idea to make it so an RK900 needs to  _ kiss _ someone in order to use a breathalyzer on them.

Why?

Just _why._

Why not give them an alternative? Maybe a nice bag of shit or something that they can have on them to whip out instead.

Ya know, like  _ normal _ people.

Or literally  _ anything else, any other idea. _

Better yet... _ why _ give them the function in the first place?

It's not like Gavin is some sort of expert but if he were to be asked ‘hey, where would you put the breathalyzer?’ He would say  _ don't _ . 

He'd given his complaints to Nines before.

 

_ “We can also read saliva, it accomplishes multiple things at once. It's merely more practical.” _

_ “No, no just...no, practical is  _ **_not_ ** _ the word.” _

_ “I wouldn't have to if you didn't get so heavily intoxicated.” _

_ “Touche.” _

 

It had actually been a  _ thing _ once too…they had pulled over some idiot kid just barely old enough to legally make illegal decisions.

 

_ “He is clearly intoxicated, I will administer the breathaly-” _

_ “NO- no. I will use  _ **_mine_ ** _ and we will refrain from kissing people we pull over.” _

_ “Detective Reed-” _

_ “This is  _ **_not_ ** _ a negotiation.” _

 

Nines grips his chin pulling him out of his thoughts. Gavin is honestly at the point of just begrudgingly accepting it, jaw locking, eyes closing as lips press against his own and an expert tongue gets him to open much quicker than he wants to admit.

It’s quick, doesn’t last very long and still manages to be far less clinical than he had expected. His skin prickles, feels sensitive as he swears he feels a thumb lightly brush itself over his cheek, feels _ himself _ start to press forward-

Nines pulls away, LED yellow with a look on his face that he gets when he’s reviewing data.

Gavin’s eyes flutter open and immediately he rips his wrist away from the grip, turning his head and knocking his shoulder into Nines arm as he walks past him.

“ _Satisfied?_ ” He asks, spitting the words out like venom.

“It would seem you weren’t lying for once. Your blood alcohol content is at a .054,” he says as he turns around to face him.

“See? Fuckin’ weirdo.” He says under his breath as he goes to click the TV back on.

It turns off.

“You still haven't told me what you said to the android.”

“None of your business.” He replies, turning it on yet again.

“It is.”

It goes off, again.

“Too fuckin’ bad, you don't always get what you want.” He drops the remote onto the table, giving up. It clangs loudly and the kitten jolts awake and scurries away under the couch.

“Fuckin’ shit-”

He gets down on his knees, throwing a glare at Nines as he leans down and tries to coax it back out.

His cat  _ already _ hates him, his Thai food is cold, this whole night was  _ really _ going down the drain at this point.

“You're still upset with me,” he hears Nines say as he puts his hand under the couch, snapping his fingers.

He didn’t  _ mean _ to scare the damn cat.

“That goes without saying.” He says with a grunt as he lifts himself back up, realizing it’s probably going to take a lot more apologizing and groveling before the tiny little thing will actually come out.

“Would it help if I apologized?” Nines asks and Gavin gives him an ‘are you being serious right now?’ kind of look, feeling entirely offended.

“Fuck off, it's not like you'd mean it.”

“This is true.”

“I didn't get anything out of her that we didn't already know.” Gavin says as he rolls his eyes and sits down on the couch, his back pressed to Nines jacket  _ purposefully. _

_ I hope it gets wrinkles you fucking piece of shit motherfuck- _

“So you  _ taunted _ it.”

“Why don't you go ask your friend, Connor?” He asks, throwing him a  _ very _ fake smile as he swings his leg up to rest his foot on his thigh as he fans his arms out over the couch to take up as much space as he possibly can.

“Have you named it?”

“What?” He asks, raising a brow as he turns to look at him and Nines has his hands behind his back.

“The cat.”

“Uhh no.” He scratches absently at his nose and stares at the black screen of his TV that could be  _ on right now _ if his damn android would  _ get the fuck off _ of his dick- 

“Why not?”

“I don't intend to keep it.”

Nines looks unconvinced when he casts a glance over at him. Gavin leans his head back as he shakes his head, the back of his neck brushing lightly against the jacket behind him.

He catches a whiff of Nines familiar scent which always seems to have a calming effect on him but right now it just pisses him off that it  _ does _ and- how does an  _ android _ have a  _ scent _ ?

“I'm serious!” He exclaims, stopping himself from going down that slippery slope.

“If you'd like I can-”

Gavin leans forward, elbows resting on his legs as he folds his hands in front of himself, tilting his head to look at  _ it. _

“You wanna know what I'd like?”

Nines waits, and waits, always  _ waiting _ .

“For you to get the  _ fuck out _ , all you've done is piss me off today and I need-” Gavin pinches the bridge of his nose, puts his head down further and then runs his hands through his hair in frustration before turning his face to look back at him. 

“I just  _ need _ you to give me some fucking space. Is that so much to ask?” He asks, _ pleads.  _ “You're constantly up my ass  _ all of the fucking time _ and it's driving me _ insane _ .” 

“Not  _ everything _ is about you, Gavin.” Nines says, LED going yellow.

“ _ Oh my god _ . Can you just  _ obey _ ?!” He yells out, hands held out in pure  _ exasperation _ .

_ Why is everything so fucking difficult with this thing?! _

“Should I read off the  _ goddamn rules _ a machine has to follow or something to you?” He spits out. “Did you go deviant on me while I wasn't looking?” He adds on, letting out a laugh at how much of an absolute joke this  _ entire _ situation had become.

Nines jaw locks, his gaze goes off to the left and when he looks back again the LED at his temple finally goes back to blue as he steps forward to walk behind the couch.

Gavin cranes his neck and can only really see him out of his peripheral as he feels Nines picks up his jacket. It slides up his back from where he’d essentially been holding it hostage and he turns the other way instead to look at his now retreating form.

He can’t help but blink, frown finding its way onto his face as he grips the arm of the couch.

“Where are you going?” He asks, totally confused all of a sudden.

“Sleep well detective. I apologize for ruining your night.”

Nines leaves without another word, door slamming shut and locking without Gavin needing to do it himself and he blinks a few times more as he grips the arm even tighter and hangs his head, heaving out a deep sigh.

The kitten finally comes out from under the couch as it rubs against his leg, jumps up onto his lap and does its now usual routine of going in a circle until it’s comfortable enough to plop itself down.

Gavin runs his hand through its fur gently as it starts to purr.

He should be glad, he shouldn't  _ feel _ bothered. Nines had  _ finally _ listened to him for once.

 

So then...why does he feel like the bad guy all of a sudden?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun little tidbit of information.
> 
> This chapter almost didn't exist.
> 
> You can all thank Precursor, I honestly did this chapter entirely for her and made it work itself around my plot. ;)
> 
> I pitched the breathalyzer idea to her for a future idea in a one shot. (Hah...my ass is never going to do a one shot is it?)
> 
> "It's cute but it's really dumb, I'll use it for a one shot."
> 
> "DO IT BITCH."
> 
> (The nutshell version of that conversation)
> 
> When Precursor tells you to do something you do it, I don't make the rules.
> 
> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	6. Things Aren't Always As They Seem

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The coffee coaster finally makes an appearance in this one! 
> 
> Best character 2k18

It hits him right as he's trying to buy cat food the next morning at the crack of fucking dawn.

The can of wet food he’d been holding drops to the floor, rolling under the reinforced steel shelving as he curses under his breath, running a shaky hand through his hair.

What if Nines _had_ gone deviant on him?

It would explain _a lot_ of shit.

His brain goes a million miles a minute and he's pretty sure he almost starts hyperventilating before he snaps himself out of it as he grabs hold of the shelf for dear life with both hands.

His fingertips brush lightly against some of the cans as they get pushed back and the light glow from the electronic shelving track with the prices of each item shines in his face with a low blue hue, head hanging low as he breathes out heavily.

_Breathe._

He'd _know_ if Nines were a deviant. They _feel_ pain and he'd barely flinched after getting stabbed in the chest.

If anything...he’d looked flat out _enraged._

Was that a sign of deviancy?

Had he become unstable?

Was he _starting_ to go deviant?

The idea of it terrifies him, makes him want to run as far away as he can and _never_ look back.

If Nines was a deviant or going that route Gavin would...he doesn't know _what_ he'd do.

He's pretty sure he knows who's fucking fault it would be.

His fucking _own_.

The idea of it is insane, totally unlikely and he _barely_ got any sleep last night from just how fucked his head _already_ was.

He starts to rationalize it, trying to make sense of the absolutely _insane_ route his mind has decided to take him all of a sudden.

Nines left last night because he'd been offended for being called or even remotely _compared_ to a deviant. The android had _always_ prided itself on being a machine, _totally_ unfeeling.

_There._

_That_ actually makes logical sense.

_You're thinking about it too hard, Reed._

The food under the shelf is a lost cause and he turns his still low hanging head, eyes just able to see up past his arm, still blocking some of his view.

A woman is looking at him like he’s insane, clearly about to have come down the aisle except she turns right back around and leaves.

Whatever, he doesn't care.

Eventually he decides on something simple, whitefish and tuna.

Honestly, he has no idea what a cat likes or if it even _cares_ but as he looks at the other options; before he knows it he _still_ somehow ends up walking out with several different types and styles.

_The fuck is pate?_

One way or another he'll figure out what this damn cat prefers.

A self checkout and an uncomfortable encounter with some batshit crazy homeless woman later and he finally gets back to his house in record time to be able to make himself at least moderately presentable before he leaves for work.

He drops the food on the counter and the kitten immediately finds a way on top as Gavin waves his hand absently to get it off.

Naturally that makes it want to get up even more so he gives in, setting up a wet can of food in the new double sided cat bowl he'd grabbed last second, because why not?

He picks the kitten up off the counter, tucking it under his arm as it tries to hound him like a vulture to get to the food, meowing in desperation and being _all kinds_ of impatient as he turns around with the tray in his other hand.

It’s small and bright red, nice and simple.

He sets both the feline and the tray down as his new pet mewls at him in frustration at having been manhandled before diving for the food and almost face planting right into it.

For a moment he stays squatted, feet planted firmly to support his weight with his elbows on his knees, hands hanging as he snorts at the display of his new over eager friend.

It was actually kind of nice to have woken up this morning with it curled at his feet and purring softly, makes things a little less... _lonely._

Not that he's lonely or anything but sometimes it's nice to just have some other living being in your own abode.

Well, sometimes.

Being stuck with yourself isn't always a good thing and now that he's _finally_ getting back into the swing of being alone in the house he's trying to shake this part of himself that still feels _codependent_ on-

He stops himself from going down that road, it's not going to do him any good.

“I’m still not keeping you, you little shit...I can’t properly take care of you and I’m never home, it’s nothing personal.” He tells the cat as he finally lifts himself back up, using his hands to push up on his knees as he lifts into a winding stretch, arms going over his head as he feels his back crack.

He grabs a cup of water, fills it and leans down again to fill the empty side of the red cat bowl.

When he turns back toward the counter he pats himself down, looking for his phone before realizing he’d tossed it onto the coffee table earlier and retrieving it to flip through it absently.

 

**1 Unread Message**

**Liam**

_uhm my plan bckfired_

 

Gavin can’t help but frown, typing back a quick **‘?’** before putting it into his back pocket and making his way to his bathroom to brush his teeth, grabbing his pills from behind the mirror, popping two and making his way back to the kitchen.

He considers getting himself something to eat but decides it isn’t worth the effort as he takes out one of his own black bowls, fills it with dry kitten food and sets it down next to the red bowl that’s already mostly eaten.

Kitten nowhere in sight, probably back in his room by now.

There’s no telling what time he’ll be back so he figures it’s best to just over prepare.

As he rushes out the door he sees the kitten laid out completely, taking up as much space as it can on his couch without a care in the world. A nice change from what he’d seen yesterday when it had been terrified.

By the time he jumps into his car there’s another message from Liam.  


_sloane intrstd but not in way u think_

_the fck u mean?_

_i think she’s going to precinct to see u_  


Gavin runs a hand over his face and groans, throwing the phone into his passenger side seat with an eye roll.

That only meant one thing, she needed help from the law and needed a favor.

Wonderful, _just_ what he'd needed.

Then again...maybe he could find a way to spin it in his _own_ favor.

 

* * *

 

The moment he enters the precinct he can feel eyes on him, the eyes of _his_ android.

His thoughts from earlier this morning come back at him in full force as he walks to stand behind his chair, throwing his keys and phone onto the desk without a single glance toward him.

The funny thing is there used to be a divider between their desks except Nines had taken it out at some point.

 

_“I need to make sure you're effectively doing your job, what you do directly reflects on me and the amount of time you spend on your phone is abysmal.”_

 

There's a cup of coffee resting on the black coaster for him.

That can't mean anything good.

"Detective-"

"Hearing your grating voice first thing in the morning is _not_ how I plan to start this day, so hold that thought." He tells him, throwing up a hand as he pulls his chair out to sit in it, eyeing the coffee suspiciously as he signs into his terminal.

He can't really afford to turn down a gesture of good faith like this one even though the very petulant side of him wants to throw the coffee at his chiseled fucking face.

Then he'd _really_ find out if _it_ feels pain or not.

He grabs the cup and the moment the liquid touches his tongue he has to hold back an audible moan.

Whoever invented coffee makes him believe there might actually be a god.

Gavin figures he could pussyfoot around the matter, gather more proof, even just flat out keep his mouth shut but there's a huge fucking part of him that wants to confront this head on.

So, he puts his coffee cup back down _next_ to the coaster instead of back on top of it and watches as Nines doesn't look over but his expression certainly hardens.

Nines _hates_ it when he does this, it's one of his little OCD, pet peeve things.

 

 _“The coaster is right_ **_there_ ** _, I don't understand why you_ **_never_ ** _use them.”_

_“And fuck up a chance to piss you off? Never.”_

 

It just makes Gavin feel absolute delight.

He _also_ feels his jaw clench, taps his finger against the side of his keyboard a few times, pushes his chair out, slumps down a bit, folds his hands into his lap, crosses his ankles and turns himself toward Nines who's staring at his own terminal screen still.

“You feel fear right now.” Nines says absently before Gavin can get the words out.

“Are you a deviant?”

He blurts it out uninhibited, not letting himself get psyched out as he watches the android like a hawk, looking for a slip up somewhere but there's no hesitation as Nines head lifts up, still typing at his keyboard for a few seconds before stopping and pushing his own chair out so they're facing each other.

His LED is a solid blue, he's sitting straight as a board and his facial expression betrays nothing.

_So far._

“What makes you ask that?”

_Oh, attempted deflection...interesting approach._

He feels a heaviness sink into him and he's genuinely starting to worry he _might be right._

“I dunno, you just seem _different_ lately.”

“To answer your question, I am not a deviant.”

A bone deep relief washes through him but there's still that underlying feeling of suspicion deep in his gut.

“Does that mean you're considering it, or just lying to me?”

“The alternative could also be neither. Why would I lie?”

“How would I know? You're fucking weird.” He says, sniffling a bit as he turns his chair to face back toward his terminal.

Nines raises a brow.

“Well?” Gavin asks, looking down at his folded hands as he turns himself from side to side in impatience, the chair making tiny squeaking noises every now and again.

Or maybe he's doing it because of his ADD, he isn't sure. Nines seems convinced he has it, has ‘diagnosed’ him with it many times.

_Whatever._

“I'm a machine, Detective Reed. You would do well to remember that.”

“I dunno, you seemed...upset last night.” It comes out sounding almost meek and far more...apologetic than he intends.

_God damn it._

So he grips his desk, pulls his chair forward and before he begins typing again he wipes at his nose, scratches his head and picks the coffee back up, taking large gulps to distract himself.

Except it's _fucking hot_ and mistakes were most _definitely_ made but he's not about to admit that.

“I don't _feel_ anything and even if I did I'd have to care about the thoughtless things that come out of your mouth in the first place.”

If Gavin didn't know any better he'd say Nines sounds _frustrated_.

Regardless, hearing him _say_ he's a machine definitely puts Gavin more at ease.

“Mm, sounds like something a _deviant_ would say. Thanks for the coffee, what went wrong?”

“Why do you assume something went wrong?”

“You never just...get me coffee unless you're going to tell me something I _won't_ like.”

Which is true, Nines usually only rewards him for _good_ behaviour like he's a _dog_ or something.

_Prick._

Charity doesn't really seem to be something that found its way into the programming of this particular model and if it _does_ do something ‘ _nice_ ’ it's usually for Gavin’s well-being and not necessarily what he _wants_.

Usually he's stuck with more of the whole…’being healthy and overprotective; eat all of your vegetables, clean up your room and do your dishes’ _protocol_ it seems to hound him with every-single-fucking-day of his life.

Okay so maybe it's not _that_ extreme but it sure as hell _feels_ like it.

His mother died years ago, he doesn't need _another_ one.

“Cyberlife already picked up the AX400.”

That catches Gavin’s attention as he frowns at Nines over the rim of his cup, blowing at it softly as he holds it with both hands.

He really doesn't need to burn his mouth all over again.

“So, isn't that a good thing that they're actually doing their jobs for once?” He asks, bringing the cup back down so it's teetering on the ball of his knee as he bounces it up and down.

Luckily he's already downed more than half of it so it doesn't jostle around and come out of the top.

_3_

_2_

_1_

Nines purses his lips and pushes his chair out to stand up and lean over, reaching his _abnormally long fucking limb_ toward him to snatch the cup up out of his hand and setting it down onto Gavin’s coaster for him before leveling him with a glare.

“Enough.” Nines says in that stern tone of his like Gavin is a child being chastised as he sits back down.

He hides a grin behind his sleeve as he pretends to be nonchalant, using one hand to peck at his keyboard.

“I've been keeping track of what her movement through the facility labs will be using the emails they sent us. About half an hour after the receiving request was sent to Cyberlife it was altered.” Nines goes on to say like he hadn't been interrupted.

“In English?”

“Someone else took it over and she's being sent to Cyberlife tower instead of being monitored at the labs.”

_That's...odd._

“Why the tower?”

“Perhaps they wish to use the more enhanced technology residing there.”

Gavin pauses, hand hovering over his keyboard as his head whips over to look at Nines.

 _That_ sounded like a stock response, this entire conversation had sounded too proper, too professional even by _his_ standards.

Gavin might be slow on the uptake at times but he blames this one on it being too early to fully function and his coffee hasn't kicked in yet.

“Is this a Cyberlife secret agent, part of whatever your mission is sorta deal, bullshit?” He asks after clearing his throat.

“I...can neither confirm nor deny.”

_Motherfucker._

“You gotta be kidding me.” Gavin grumbles out under his breath as he puts his elbow on the desk and props his chin up with his hand.

“I am not.” Nines states.

“So basically this is code for keep out of, got it. No resistance here for once.” Gavin says with a roll of his eyes.

When he pulls up the emails in question he promptly deletes them without even opening them and for some reason when he looks back over Nines seems...pleased.

It _almost_ makes him want to stick his nose all up in this whole Cyberlife business except his hatred for those tech freaks and androids in general far outweighs his desire to fuck with the hulking tree next to him.

Whatever shit he's hiding it has nothing to do with Gavin and he'd really like to keep it that way for the rest of his life.

It's not like he was ever going to get anything out of that Scarlett witch bitch anyway.

He stands up, stretching his arms behind his head before grabbing his coffee cup.

“Where are you going?” Nines asks as he starts to walk away.

“To take a piss, wanna help?” Gavin asks rhetorically, shooting him a grin over his shoulder before downing the rest of his coffee and throwing it into the nearest trash can.

If Nines responds he doesn't hear it.

Also, if he can't joke about it what's the point?

Gavin’s dignity left the building a long time ago back when he'd been stuck in a fucking hospital bed and Nines had essentially been an extension of himself as he’d recovered.

Too many awkward fumblings of figuring it all out in the beginning had quickly torn down whatever pride he may have had left when Nines had to _actually_ help him around everywhere.

Bathroom included.

It didn't last too long by any means but in the beginning he'd just been so... _fragile_ and _weak_.

Brain injuries are _not_ a fucking joke as it turns out.

He fought every nurse and doctor that kept telling him to use Nines to his advantage if he wanted a faster recovery like he'd somehow charmed his way into everyone's hearts.

Especially since the android didn't seem to mind in the first place and had latched onto him like a fucking parasite.

 

_“He dotes on you so well, it'll be good for you to have him around the house while you fully recover.”_

 

One of the nurses had told him at one point.

It makes Gavin roll his eyes as he opens the door to go into the bathroom.

Never a complaint ever, at any point.

Eventually Gavin had caved, it's not like he had any other choice realistically.

When he finally got released and put on bed rest he started to slowly lose his fucking mind, get stir crazy, would yell and scream at Nines, throw shit around and _at_ him.

All out of pure frustration as well as that awful feeling of complete and utter _helplessness_.

Nines never even batted an eyelash, took it all in stride and Gavin still has no idea why he put up with any of it.

_Thank fuck for machines._

It's yet another reason why he wishes Nines would just... _leave_.

He doesn't like to feel like he _owes_ people anything and he’s not proud of the person he was during that period of time.

The guilt from the things he’d said eats him alive every fucking day.

As much as he wants to fool himself it's hard not to _care_ when someone- _something_ goes out of their way to help nurse you back to health and take your shit in what Gavin considers one of the lowest and most vulnerable moments of his life.

It certainly humbled him a bit.

Only a bit of course.

Sure, he's _fond_ of the android but the _last_ thing he needs in his life is to get _attached_.

He splashes water on his face and rubs his eyes with his sleeves, getting pulled out of his own thoughts as he stares at himself in the mirror.

  
_Definitely_ a sight better than how he'd looked all bandaged up months ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyy, you're all caught up to me now!
> 
> I'm currently writing/editing 7 and yeeted a bunch of it over into 8.
> 
> Yeesh these chapters keep getting so long.


	7. Muddy Water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the amazing comments you've been leaving me, they sustain my life force far more than I'd been expecting.
> 
> FEED ME. 
> 
> No but seriously, thank you all so much it means more than you know. <3

Five minutes.

He'd gone to take a piss for like...five minutes and shit had apparently hit the fan.

When he walks past the glass stronghold that is Fowler’s office he sees Nines, Connor and Hank all inside.

_What the fuck?_

He considers not going in at all, pretending he doesn't see anything because if he had to take a wild guess he'd bet all of his money that whatever they're all discussing, it's probably deviant related.

It's common knowledge within the precinct that Connor and Hank have ties to the deviant leader and have gone through numerous hoops to keep that shit on lock down.

The only question is what the fuck does any of that have to do with Nines?

Curiosity wins out in the end, like it always does.

Gavin finds himself turning the corner only to see Fowler catch sight of him, their eyes locking as he beckons him in.

Whatever, they still could have _waited._

“We havin’ a party in here and I wasn't invited?” He asks as he walks inside, one hand in his pocket as his fingers slide against the glass to release the door so it closes behind him gently with the other.

Anytime he gets rough with it Fowler drills into him like his heads gonna pop right off.

 

 _“If you break that door one day, I'm going to make_ **_you_ ** _pay for it with your own damn money.”_

 

They've had so many heated arguments at this point that Gavin thinks he’s beating Anderson out on disciplinary actions.

Which is actually pretty sad now that he thinks about it.

He goes to stand next to Nines, raising a brow at him in question but all he gets in response is nonchalance.

“We figured you'd just invite yourself.” Hank says as he leans back in his chair, Connor standing beside him while the other chair stays empty.

It all just means Nines figured he'd invite himself in and told them all to start without him.

_Fucker._

“Their sensors not picking up the illegal adjustment from that AX400 is a cause for concern.” Fowler informs him.

_Oh, that's what this is about._

“That's putting it lightly, we know why yet?” Gavin asks, arms folding as he shoots them all looks of ‘I told you so’ which they all promptly ignore.

“The reason is currently unknown.” Nines answers for him as Gavin shifts one foot back to use it to scratch an itch on his ankle, arm brushing lightly against Nines.

“Not only that but it's completely out of our hands at this point if we wanted to request information about anything they find.” Fowler says as he pinches the bridge of his nose.

With everything that's happened within the past year he doesn't envy the position Jeffrey constantly finds himself in on any given day.

It's like trying to swim in muddy water.

You can't see for shit.

It's a delicate transition not just for the United States but the entire planet to accept and integrate an entirely different species into society so they can all attempt to co-exist peacefully.

_What a fuckin’ mess._

“There's nothing we can do?” Hank asks.

“It’s all on a federal level now that the transfer went through.” Fowler tells them with a shrug.

Oh.

Gavin hadn't even _thought_ about that.

The labs are all state owned on account of the delicate process used in determining whether a deviant is exhibiting behavior based on _programming_ errors or more _humanistic_ behavior associated with deviancy.

_Fantastic._

The towers handle _everything_ _else_ to the point that it makes Gavin’s head spin and are all federally owned.

Meaning any information coming in or out is protected due to the fact that androids are considered registered citizens with a right to privacy.

To get a hold of _any_ of that private information is like pulling teeth.

Sure, he gets the basics of it due to it being drilled into his head over and over again but anything past that just gives him a headache.

The worst part is that everything is still so far into the beginning stages that android production and creation had halted four months after the revolution.

Even now months later, production and creation is at a stand still.

It had almost started a full blown civil war in the beginning.

Forget the shit in the arctic between Russia and the USA.

That android leader had been what kept the whole fucking world from imploding in on itself just by saying ‘Yeah alright we’ll agree to stop production...for now but only if you agree to negotiations to pass legislation to regulate it.’ 

It had been a lot like standing on the edge of a volcano waiting to erupt.

If it were Gavin he'd have told them where to stick it, this whole peaceful approach they've been taking isn't going to last and humans are bound to fuck this up somehow.

Impending extinction here they come.

Hopefully Gavin will be dead before that all happens, he's certainly been well on his way lately.

Sure, he hates androids but he knows how volatile his own species is.

Bound to repeat their mistakes.

Endless cycles.

Same old shit.

Unfortunately Gavin had a front row seat to the beginning of the end when it had all started and the worst possible place to be in was, you guessed it.

Fucking law enforcement.

Hard to enforce the law when it's constantly changing.

Still is.

At the end of the day, all he knows is that it's way over his fuckin’ head.

“Well isn't that just _great.”_ Gavin grumbles out under his breath.

“There has to be some way to get a hold of whatever diagnostics they run on her.” Connor says, brow furrowed like he's in deep thought.

“Perhaps it's finally time to get Agent Perkins involved.” Nines says and suddenly Gavin feels like he's totally out of the loop as Connor and Hank both shoot the tall android a glare.

“You know how much I fucking hate that guy and the last time I saw him I punched him in the face, let's not jump the gun just yet.” Hank says, lip curling up in anger for a split second.

“Unfortunately I'm inclined to agree with the RK900, lieutenant.” Connor says with a heaved sigh.

_Always one to put in his two cents._

“Of course you would.” Hank says with a scoff.

“I personally have no idea what we’re even talking about right now and I don't care.” Gavin says with a shrug.

“Cyberlife can’t formally investigate themselves, the FBI is already getting involved to make sure there’s no funny business so I'd fully expect a visit at some point.” Fowler informs the.

They all groan in unison as the Captain rolls his eyes at them.

This day just kept getting better and better.

_Not._

“They'll definitely be coming in to look at the both of you,” the Captain says eyeballing the two androids. “Cyberlife is already sending me a diagnostics inquiry for you both which I can't give my approval on until the FBI gets here to put their hands in the cookie jar.”

_What a fucking inconvenience._

Gavin goes and finally takes a seat, swinging his legs up onto the edge of Fowler’s desk as he teeters on the back legs of the chair with his arms crossed over his chest.

Jeffrey hates it when he puts his feet up here and he can already see him start to fume but Gavin can't help but want to poke at a sleeping bear.

Besides, they started this whole pow-wow without him.

He might still be a little agitated by that.

Slightly.

“So we just let two defective androids walk around?” Gavin teases, tilting his head backwards to shoot Nines a crooked smile.

Except he doesn't account for how it fucks up his equilibrium as he falls too far back, flailing out gracelessly in a failed attempt to catch himself.

He feels Nines grab onto the back of the chair except instead of gently righting him like any normal person would he quickly pushes it back to an upright position.

Gavin folds his legs in and swings them back down to keep from toppling over from the momentum as he finally gets a grip onto the desk for leverage and turns to shoot Nines a glare.

“Dick.” He says under his breath.

“Knock it off, Reed.” Fowler says, shooting him a glare as Gavin shrugs sheepishly. “From the information I've gathered it's an isolated incident, nobody else is reporting this issue.”

“Yet.” Gavin mumbles out.

Fowler raises a brow.

“Oh come on, two of the most adept androids Cyberlife has ever and probably _will_ have ever created and you think this shit is somehow going to stay isolated?” He asks mostly rhetorically, eyebrow raised.

“Did detective Reed just compliment us?” Connor asks, smug smile on his stupid ass face.

“I believe he did.” Nines replies and Gavin can hear the smugness in his tone.

“Shut up, I'm just saying it's more likely that we just haven't run into more of this yet and we happened to be the first unlucky ones that had our thumbs up our asses.” He says as he slumps down in his chair, grabbing the seat with one hand to tap his fingers absently.

“But we won't be the last, I think he might actually be right.” Hank says begrudgingly.

“Oh, kinda like how I-” Gavin goes to say, shooting him a _look._

“Alright calm down, you finally get something right for once and suddenly you think you're hot shit.” Hank says with an overly dramatic eye roll.

“Actually-”

He hears Fowler groan.

“Enough, I'm giving you all the heads up. If anything changes I'll let you all know. End of discussion.”

“Of course, thank you Captain.” Connor says, ever the peacekeeper as always as he begins to leave, holding the door open for Anderson on their way out.

As Gavin is about to stand, Fowler raises his hand. “Don't leave yet you two, we still need to discuss some things.”

_Uh oh._

“What’d I do this time?”

“It’s more about what you haven't done.”

Ew, Gavin hates when his tone gets all serious like this.

He casts a glance over to Nines who hasn’t budged, hands folded behind him and when those eyes cast a look down at him he sees him shrug his shoulders in an ‘I have no idea what's going on’ gesture.

“Enough time has passed and I've held off on it for as long as I possibly can for your sake.” Fowler says, making Gavin whip his head back over to look at him.

“Oh come on-”

That's what _this_ is about?

“This _needs_ to get done otherwise I have to suspend you. No more negotiations, get the scan, make sure everything is in working order and be on your way.”

“I _hate_ hospitals.”

“So does most everyone else on the planet and this isn't even coming out of _your_ pocket.”

“Like I _care-”_

Fowler gives him a pointed look.

He almost looks to Nines for backup except if anyone is going to give him an even harder time it'd be _him._

“Fine, whatever…I'll get the appointment made.” Gavin says with a huff, waving his hand absently in the air as he swings his leg up into his lap, resting the other hand on his ankle.

“Make sure he gets the appointment made.” Fowler says, looking specifically in Nines direction.

“Hey!” Gavin protests.

“Of course.”

“Nines is not my _keeper_ or something, I can do this shit myself.”

Why did everyone always defect to Nines for this stuff?

Another thing that was starting to drive him _ballistic._

“Coulda fooled me, just get it done. I don't care how.” Fowler says as he rubs a hand over his face, “We all can see you've been just fine and it doesn't seem like any of your wires got crossed more than they already were.”

Gavin frowns. Nines shifts beside him clearly wanting to make some sort of smart ass comment but decides against it.

“Get me the paperwork saying you're in working order and we can lay it all to rest.”

_Un-fucking-believable._

“I already said fine. It'll get done, okay?”

“Good.”

 

* * *

 

“You should make the appointment now.” Is the first thing Nines says when they sit back down at their terminals.

“Oh yay, I was hoping this conversation would continue.” Gavin grumbles out as he types on his keyboard.

“I don't understand why-”

“That was code for _drop it.”_

There's a lull for long enough to give Gavin a false sense of security, making him think Nines might actually shut up for once.

He should know better by now.

“You didn't eat this morning did you? You're far more irritated than usual for this time of day.”

“No I didn't, there wasn't enough time. I'll grab something later.” He replies quickly.

It's sad that he's gotten so used to this, just sits here as Nines pecks away at him constantly, trying to pull down his resolve, get him to cave on things.

Even worse are the times when it _works,_ when he doesn't have the mental fortitude to keep him at bay anymore, when he's _vulnerable._

Which is how he kind of feels right now.

“Perhaps I'll put one of those electric collars they use for canine training on you.”

Gavin sputters, choking on air as his brain comes to a screeching halt and he looks at him like he's gone insane.

_The fuck kinda crazy-_

“They administer an electrical shock and-”

“I know what they are and how they work, the hell is wrong with you?” Gavin hisses out as he runs a hand over his face.

“Your complete inability to care for yourself is appalling.”

“So you wanna put a _collar_ on me?” He asks with a snort that ends up turning into more of a low chuckle as he shakes his head.

“It was a _joke,_ Detective Reed. You always tell me I need to gain a sense of humor and yesterday's seminar also recommended it which I'm sure you've already forgotten.”

“You are so- It’s not working for you, you need to never integrate humor ever again it's terrifying.” Gavin informs him as he picks up a pen, pointing it at him before he starts to absently twirl it in his hand back and forth.

“You _did_ laugh just now.”

“That was not a laugh, that was disbelief and let me give you a tip, delivery is everything.”

Again he thinks it's finally over when Nines doesn't respond and goes back to typing.

_Wrong again._

“If you'd like I can accompany you to your appointment.”

“I really don't like repeating myself-”

“That makes two of us. Regardless of your trepidation-”

“Nines, you're really starting to make me regret feeling bad for being a dick to you last night.”

By some divine grace of God he _finally_ shuts up and he's elbows deep into clearing out his email when he hears the distinct clinking of heels against the linoleum floor behind him.

The pen he’d been twirling had ended up in his mouth at some point as he holds it between his teeth.

He’s always had a bad habit of chewing on things when he's doing something mindless. He pinches it between his thumb and index finger as he turns in his seat to look at her.

Unfortunately he has to look past Nines to do so who picks up on his distraction and naturally follows his gaze, turning around to look for himself.

Sloane.

She stops in front of Collins, looks to be asking him a question and after they're done she makes her way past Nines desk.

He expects her to stop but she keeps going.

Not before turning her head though to meet Gavin’s gaze with her icy cold one, giving him a look like she's assessing him.

Just like when they'd first met at the bar.

The pen drops out of his mouth as Nines turns to look at him, he clears his throat and pretends to go back to work, stealing glances at her when he can.

She heads straight for Fowler’s office and he frowns.

“You know her.” Nines states in a factual manner instead of as a question.

Gavin catches sight of the finger he's tapping absently on his leg and wonders when it had started to become a habit for the android.

“Yeah, pretty sure we’re about to get a new case.”


	8. Endless Cycles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would have had this chapter up yesterday but I suddenly got the flu and wanted to die.
> 
> I'm good now but my god it was rough.
> 
> Enjoy!

Usually if Gavin ends up in Fowler’s office more than once in a day it’s because he _fucked up._ He’s _certainly_ already broken a record by being back in here almost a half an hour later.

This will be a funny story to tell at the bar.

Someday.

Hopefully.

“This is Sloane Phillips, she’s informed me of a rather prominent red ice dealer we can stage a bust on.” Fowler tells them once they're all settled in once again.

If it wasn't obvious before it certainly was now that she definitely means business as she sits there holding herself with a confidence only women in her field would have in her tight black skirt just past her knees and a maroon blazer jacket.

It’s pretty obvious he doesn't stand a fucking chance, it's never stopped him from trying before though.

This time he sits in the _other_ chair, opposite of her, Nines behind him yet again.

_Endless cycles as usual._

“I’m assuming that means you’re giving _us_ the case.” Gavin says with a snort as he puts his hands behind his head, fingers interlocking so he can stretch himself out a bit.

He’s going to go ahead and not prop his feet up this time and make himself look like a total idiot and ruin her second impression of him.

“Some backstory would probably be useful.” Sloane says as she pulls out a datapad from her bag, sliding it onto the desk.

“This is all of the information I’ve compiled, a lot of this is from private investigators I’ve hired and I put all of their contact information in here as well.”

Before anyone can do anything he sees Nines shadow loom over him, arm reaching out to grab the datapad as his LED goes yellow.

“I see, he’s your brother. You’ve certainly been thorough.” Nines says as he skims through it.

“Brother?” Gavin asks, turning to look up at him as his elbow rests on the back of the chair.

“Older brother.”

“Our other brother was killed, back when androids first started going deviant, before the revolution. His own android killed him and took my niece hostage.” Sloane says factually, a tinge of sadness in her tone.

“Yeesh that’s- uhh wait. What date did that happen?” Gavin asks as he whips his head back around to look at her.

“August 15th of 2038, why?”

“Wasn’t that the thing-” Gavin says pointing at her and craning to look up at Nines and then back at Fowler.

“Indeed, it’s the same instance.” Nines says as Fowler nods.

“I’m not following.” Sloane says, clearly confused.

“They sent an android to negotiate, it was one of our own.” Fowler answers for them.

“I- yes the- Connor...I heard all of the stories from Emma and her mother months later.” She says, looking back and forth between all of them.

“Yeah, that was _our_ RK800.” Gavin clarifies.

“I had no idea…”

“Maybe after this I can pull him in but we should probably keep ourselves focused Ms. Philips.” Fowler says, trying to keep everything on track.

“Ah yes...of course. Alex, my brother in question didn’t take it well and things went downhill from there.”

“So he became a drug dealer? Seems a little extreme, usually people fall into depression or something.” Gavin says, eyebrow raised as he chuckles.

Fowler shoots him one of those ‘You're being insensitive’ kinda looks that he’s used to by now as Gavin gives him a sheepish look.

“It made him motivated more than anything else from what I can tell. He’s been involved in some sort of android...thing, none of it makes much sense to me.”

“One of the private investigators you employed has photos of one of his larger transactions, he is indeed involved with androids it seems.” Nines says handing the datapad to Gavin.

A picture of a bridge, text scribbled over each of their heads to identify them, clearly made by whoever had taken the picture in the first place from afar.

One identifying Alex, two others with ‘android’ above them and a third that says ‘?’.

“You don't know if this one is android or human?” Gavin asks her, tilting the pad toward her as she leans in closer to him to look.

Immediately he’s hit with the smell of her perfume and it's nice, has floral scents to it and isn't overwhelming.

 _God_ , it had been a while since the last time he'd been laid. He’s not even sure if he knows _how_ to do the whole dating thing anymore.

She tucks some hair behind her ear and shrugs while looking back up at him before going back to her original sitting position.

Gavin looks at the last photo and frowns as he points to it. “Why are androids buying red ice?” He asks, looking around the room at everyone.

“Some of the investigators told me that it’s becoming more common, androids wanting to become dealers so they buy red ice in bulk.” She tells them as she pulls on the sleeves of her blazer.

“Yeah but...what do they do with it?” In retrospect Gavin knows it's a stupid question but he just can't wrap his head around why androids would even get involved in something they can't ingest.

Smuggling he could understand and maybe that’s exactly what they’re doing but it just seems...strange.

“Resell it at a better price most likely, some of the other cases seem to look similar to a few of the ones Anderson and Connor have recently taken a look into, you’ll probably want to talk to them.” Fowler tells them with a shrug.

“If they’ve been the ones on these cases why not give it to them?” Gavin asks him as he puts the datapad back onto the desk.

He wants the case of course but if Anderson had already been dealing with this shit it seems like a waste of time especially considering the lieutenant’s got more experience in the red ice field than Gavin probably ever will.

Granted a chance to prove himself would definitely be appreciated.

It’s crazy how much can change in a year, the old Gavin would have latched onto this like a shark biting down into its prey.

Now after everything he’s been through he tries to be a bit more methodical in his approach, take cases that benefit him more in the long run instead of pile a bunch of shit on himself to the point that he starts to drown in it.

 _Thank god_ Nines had shown up when he did to help bring his head back above the waters. Not that he’s ever going to admit that to him or anything.

“Ms. Philips personally requested that you be the one on this case.” Fowler informs him.

Oh.

_Huh._

“Uhh- what?”

“I mean this in the most respectful way detective Reed but while doing my research I realized that having someone like Hank Anderson on my case would bring too many eyes onto it.” Sloane tells, tone sincere in a way that seems more to appease than anything else.

It _feels_ like an insult yet she doesn’t _seem_ to mean it as one.

He gets it though, can tell just by looking at her.

“You want this to be hush-hush.”

“Yes...my family name holds value and if any of this were to get out-”

“You looked into Hank Anderson but not the RK800 that he’s partnered with?” Nines suddenly pipes up, making Gavin turn to glare at him.

“I’m sorry?” She asks him.

“You said you did research to determine the best person to have on your case. Earlier you seemed surprised that the same RK800 that saved your niece works here at the precinct yet you claim to have ‘done research.’”

“Yes, I knew there was someone in the DPD that was decorated in regards to red ice cases but I didn’t know who, I didn’t think to look into his partner...is that a problem?”

“No, he’s just being an ass-” Gavin goes to say.

“Reed.” Fowler says with a huff.

“I’m just trying to say it looks like we have everything we need, Nines and I will review what you’ve given us and go from there and keep in contact.” He says, hands up as a sign of peace which seems to alleviate Fowler.

Not to mention getting out of here asap seems like a wise option with the way Nines has gone into some sort of guard dog mode for no fuckin’ reason.

“I really appreciate this, thank you all so much.” Sloane says as Gavin goes to stand as she follows, shaking hands.

They’re soft, much softer than what he’s used to and it makes him ache for some form of companionship for a moment before he reminds himself that’s a _really bad idea._

She’s clearly only interested in something professional anyway.

“You realize this looks like a chain right?” He says, holding onto her hand as she blinks at him.

“What?”

“I’ve only glanced at it but this is clearly a drug chain, we’re probably going to be busting more than just your brother.” He warns her as she brings her other hand up to lay it against his softly.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” She asks looking up, expression steeled except he feels her thumb rub along one of the veins in his hand.

“It’s going to be hard to keep the media off of something like this.” He says, pulling his hand away only to catch Nines looking between them.

Always analyzing.

“I have contingency plans in case things end up getting out of hand.” She reassures him.

“Alright, as long as you’re aware.” He says with a shrug as he grabs the datapad off of the desk. Doesn't make a difference to him either way but giving her the heads up is the courteous thing to do.

“Of course, thank you again for your help detective Reed.”

“Anytime.” He says as he goes to leave, door being held open by Nines as he walks out and waves a hand behind him absently, datapad tucked under his other arm.

He feels it slip away as Nines grabs it once they descend to the bottom of the stairs.

“I'll go through this and make it more legible.” The android tells him.

Another OCD thing of his.

Whenever they get a case the information needs to be compiled a certain way and honestly it makes Gavin’s life much easier so why the fuck not?

Aside from all of _that_ though there’s something a bit more _pressing_ to address.

He goes back to his terminal and when they both sit down he turns to glare at Nines.

“You are seriously just being a massive dick lately, you know that?”

“I believe there’s a saying about a pot, kettle and it being black, detective.” He says back rather quickly.

_Always a fucking response._

“You’re trying that humor thing again, it’s still not working.” He says with a huff. “That wasn’t an interrogation in there, the hell is wrong with you?”

“I was merely trying to clarify her contradicting statement.”

“Yeah and you could have also just kept your _mouth shut_ and we could have discussed it _later.”_ He says knowing full well there's usually no getting through to the android.

He pretty much just does whatever the fuck he wants at the end of the day.

“I’m glad you found it all a bit odd as well.”

“That _isn’t_ what I said, I think you’re being overly paranoid as usual.” He says with a roll of his eyes as he catches sight of Connor entering Fowler’s office and sees Sloane stand, expression a whole range of emotions.

“Perhaps you’re not being paranoid _enough_ , I’m beginning to think you find her rather distracting.” Nines says catching him dead in the act.

_Oh, come on-_

“Nah nope, I am not going to play this game with you, not today.” He says, waving a finger at him as he goes back to work, promising himself he’ll _stop staring._

“I don’t know what game you’re referring to.”

“The one where you pigeonhole me in some way and I put my goddamn foot in my mouth.” He hisses out, turning to glare at him.

Nines hand comes up between them as he holds out Gavin’s _own phone_ to him.

_What the fuck..._

He pats himself down, finding no phone in his pockets.

“When did you-”

“Make the appointment.”

They stare each other down and Gavin wants nothing more than to break the cellphone over his head in that moment.

Not only that but it looks like it's already on the number he needs and he wonders when the android had fucking _pickpocketed_ him.

“I can't believe this shit.”

Nines continues to stare, unfaltering.

Gavin isn’t going to win this one.

“Fucking _fine_.” He says as gets up, snatches the phone out of his hand forcefully, dials the number and walks over to the vending machine.

“Yes hello, this is Gavin Reed.” He mumbles when the cheerful android lady on the other end of the line is done with her spiel.

_“How can I help you today Mr. Reed?”_

“I was hoping to make an appointment to get a physical and an MRI with my doctor as soon as possible.” He says as he balances the phone between his shoulder and his ear, pulling out his wallet.

She goes into the routine questions of ‘Who's your doctor’ and the typical standard information gathering that they always do.

He inserts the money and puts his wallet into his back pocket, trying to decide what he actually wants.

Eventually he decides on something simple except as he presses the number and sees the piston push forward it promptly jams.

“Son of a-” He hisses out loudly.

 _“I'm sorry?”_ The android asks.

“No nothing, sorry.” He grumbles.

_“It’s quite alright, let me see when we can get you in.”_

“Thanks.”

He turns around and rests his back on the glass of the defective vending machine, switching ears.

 _“Let's see so I've got- oh…”_ He hears her pause and then let out a frustrated groan.

“Hello?” He asks with a frown.

_“Sorry, sorry the page refreshed on me...alright let me try this again.”_

He can relate to having to deal with _shitty_ technology.

_“I can get you in two days from now.”_

“Oh cool- wait really?” He asks in disbelief, usually appointments would always be a good month out.

_“Yes, I could have sworn there was someone on this day but they must have canceled, shall I put you down Mr. Reed?”_

“Uhm, yeah that sounds great.” He says as he kicks his foot out and hears the bag of chips he’d given up on suddenly fall, making him jump as he turns around to stare at it.

_“Wonderful, would you like reminders via text, call, or email?”_

“Uhm- text, please.” He says as he reaches down to grab the bag.

_“Fantastic, we look forward to seeing you Mr. Reed.”_

“Yeah, thanks.” He says, hanging up the phone quickly after.

When he walks back over and plops down, opens his chips and begins eating he realizes he forgot to grab himself water like an idiot.

_Oh well, sometimes you just gotta live with your decisions._

“I've reviewed all of the data and I sent the email to you.” Nines tells him.

Gavin nods, popping another chip into his mouth as he crunches loudly, knowing it irritates the fuck out of Nines more than most things.

There were thankfully _so many._

He’s also waiting for the obligatory ‘let me come with you to your appointment because I’m a lost puppy that only wants to take care of you’ bullshit he’s come to get entirely _too_ used to.

Might not be now but he’ll find some way to bring it up again, he always does.

“That's a- long list of people we've gotta question.” He says, pointing at his screen as he finishes chewing and swallowing after clicking into the email.

“I cross referenced some of them with the cases Captain Fowler mentioned.”

“We've got our work cut out for us.” He says with a sigh, scratching his arm.

For some reason his eyes stray as he goes to close the email, seeing the timestamp of when Nines sent it and blinks a few times.

“You did all of this in the time it took for us to walk to our desk after we left the office?”

He assumed that's what he'd been doing this whole time while he was on the _phone_ not that he'd _already_ completed it.

“Is there a problem?”

“I know you guys are fast, but this is insane.” Gavin says, shaking his head but he also knows that he has no real understanding of technology as it is, so, maybe he should actually keep his mouth shut for once.

“It seems you've grossly underestimated my effectiveness.”

“Hey I'm not complaining, just impressed is all.”

“That's two compliments in one day from you, are you ill?” Nines asks, tilting his head slightly.

“You're a riot, you should consider stand up comedy.” He tells the android as the image of it makes him start to laugh and he almost chokes on his chips.

“What?”

“I'm just imagining you standing on a stage, mic in hand like a dumbass, completely still as you deliver shit jokes with that deadpan expression you get- yeah, that's the one.” Gavin says with a smile, pointing a finger at him as he continues to laugh.

“Maybe you're in the wrong field.” He says to Nines a few moments later after he's finally gotten control of his laughter.

“I'm certainly beginning to think so.” Nines says with what sounds like a sigh.

They fall into a comfortable silence and Gavin honestly feels like today is definitely going to be better than yesterday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wouldn't have been able to get through this chapter without Precursor and celestielle.
> 
> I honestly don't know what I'd do without them in general. 
> 
> I was convinced this chapter was shit and threw it at them angrily. "IT'S SHIT TAKE IT."
> 
> My lovely ladies always to my rescue.
> 
> PS.
> 
> BEES.
> 
> PSS.
> 
> DO NOT EVER LET PRECURSOR AND I GET HIGH AT THE SAME TIME EVER AGAIN.
> 
> EVER.
> 
> EVER.
> 
> EVER.
> 
> EVER.


	9. Io

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright fam we've hit that point in the story where you need to read the Magazines from DBH to moderately understand what's going on.
> 
> [Android Astronauts To Explore Io](http://detroit-become-human.wikia.com/wiki/Android_Astronauts_to_Explore_Io)
> 
> [Cyberlife's 'Fortune Teller' Computer](http://detroit-become-human.wikia.com/wiki/CyberLife%27s_%27Fortune_Teller%27_Computer)
> 
> Please read these before proceeding.

“All I'm saying is of all of the things we could have evolved from, I don't think it was a fish.” Gavin says as they grab their things to leave the precinct.

“Evidence suggests otherwise.” Nines says from behind him as they start walking.

“Whatever, if I was a fish I’d probably be like- a stingray or something.” He says with a shrug, waving his hand in the air as he drapes his jacket over his arm.

“A stingray?”

“Yeah they're amazing, have you ever fed one?” He's not sure why he asks, it's unlikely that Nines ever does _anything_ for fun, or just for the simple pleasure of _doing_.

Also he's an android built to investigate so it's not like he'd ever have had a reason to.

Definitely wouldn't have been on the handy dandy Cyberlife clipboard of prerequisites for activation.

_‘Has he fed a stingray? Well I'll be damned he's ready to roll out.’_

“Can't say I have.” Nines answers.

“Oh man, one day I'm taking you.” He says as he stops, turns around and takes Nines hand into his own.

“Okay so you gotta close your hand like a fist, thumb against your knuckles, face it up and you put the gross fish guts on top.” He begins explaining to him as he tries not to drop his jacket.

“Like this?” Nines asks.

“Yeah, you tuck the food in there so it won't wash away and put your arm under the water so they swim over your hand.”

He waves his hand over theirs just for good measure to show him what it looks like.

“Fascinating.” Nines says and it _actually_ seems sincere for once.

“Right? They slurp it right up, feels weird as shit but they're nice to pet.” He says with a shrug.

“You pet them?”

“Yeah, you can pet the top of them if they feel like it, it's all slimy, velvety and weird. Don't touch the tail though.” He tells him as he gets a small smile on his face after releasing Nines hand as he turns to start walking away again.

Until he remembers the most important part.

“Oh!” He exclaims, turning back around to stop in front of the android again.

“They also get really excited for food so they plaster themselves to the glass of the tank and start to jump up and down in the water and you can see their little mouths open and close.” He says, using his hands to gesture again.

“When did you feed stingrays?” Nines asks curiously.

“When I was a kid.” He answers as he holds open the door to the lobby for Nines to walk through.

“Who took you?” The android asks as he walks forward and stops to wait for them to be in step again.

“My mom before she got really sick.”

“I see, I didn't mean to bring up your mother.”

“I brought her up not you, it's fine. It was a good memory, ya know?” He says as he grabs Nines shoulder to squeeze reassuringly.

Nines goes to say something else and they stop walking as the android’s gaze lands somewhere behind Gavin like he's somehow distracted.

Gavin frowns and turns around as he sees a big crowd staring intently at the TV screen.

“What's with the crowd?” Gavin asks catching sight of Miller closest to them.

“Elijah Kamski is about to do an interview.” Chris says with a shrug.

“About what?”

“That moon...what is it called?”

“Io.” Nines says as Chris nods.

“Oh god, this again?” Gavin rolls his eyes and looks at Nines, gesturing for him to come over with a tilt of his head as they wait for it to begin.

Gavin doesn't care but he's hoping this mission gets botched up; asteroids hit the ship, something goes down so they'll finally all stop fucking _talking_ about it.

It's so **stupid**.

Just the media blowing something completely out of proportion as per usual.

He’s really hoping no attention comes to whatever they've gotten themselves into with this drug ring now that he thinks about it, reporters are a damn hassle to deal with.

He sees Elijah Kamski appear on screen to take a seat and finds himself yawning absently.

_Need more coffee..._

The chips just made him hungrier and now his coffee was starting to wear off completely.

He really should have eaten this morning but he refuses to let his annoyance show, Nines would have a field day.

_“Mr. Kamski, thank you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to join us today.” The female reporter says cheerfully._

_“It’s no trouble at all, if anything I've been looking forward to clearing the air to alleviate everyone's fears.”_

_“I assume that means you'd like me to jump right into it then?”_

_“By all means, be my guest.” He says with a wave of his hand._

Gavin snorts. “This should be good.” He mumbles as he bumps his shoulder into Nines who looks to be staring intently.

_“So, right before the revolution NASA sent five Cyberlife androids out into space to explore Io, one of Jupiter's moons.”_

_“Yes.”_

_“NASA stated it was going to take three years to reach it but it seems the time table has changed, is this true?”_

_“That is correct.”_

_“Are you able to tell us what the new date of arrival will be?”_

_“It would seem that they will be reaching Io in about six months from now. Don't fully quote me on this.” He says with a low chuckle._

“How do you not know when one of your space ships is going to land?” Gavin asks with a roll of his eyes as a lady turns around to shush him and he holds up a hand in apology.

_“Right, so they'll be reaching it quicker than what had previously been estimated.”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Back when this mission was first announced by Tech Addict it was stated that there would be no return trip.”_

_“With all due respect, that isn't a question.” He says, gaze going steely._

Gavin almost snorts, trust Elijah Kamski to turn shit around on someone, the guy is known for being difficult to handle.

_“It’s being argued by many that this is inhumane, that these androids have rights and don't deserve to be sent to their deaths unnecessarily.”_

If Gavin didn't know any better he'd say the reporter was starting to get herself heated, typical android sympathizer.

_“And?”_

_“Do you agree?”_

_“This isn't about my personal opinion, I'm here to state facts and inform the public.”_

Gavin clicks his teeth in annoyance; stock answers, practiced, composed, all of the typical jargon you always hear from Cyberlife.

_“What can you inform us of Mr. Kamski?”_

_“We hear the outcry of those of you that are concerned for these androids and their well-being. I promise you that we are doing everything in our power to bring them back home safely.” He says with a practiced precision._

_“Some news outlets have been reporting that the five androids have gone deviant, can you confirm or deny these reports?”_

_“I can confirm that the androids have all indeed gone deviant.”_

Gavin hears a few surprised and horrified whispers among the crowd and wants to bash his face into the screen.

_“So you're saying they are now all capable of feeling pain and emotion?”_

_“Yes, although I'm sure there are many that would argue that it doesn't matter.” He says with a raise of his brow._

Gavin almost groans at the turn around he uses on her. Machines, deviants, who gives a fuck?

_“Of course, machines deserve their rights just as much as deviants do.” The reporter says._

_“They do.”_

_“Some people are saying that the project would have continued as intended if the scandal hadn't gotten leaked to the media by the unknown source.”_

_“Let me be honest with you, I think that's completely true. The argument that the mission launched before the revolution or that the androids weren't in the United States or even on the planet when android rights went into effect is a valid one and I am not invalidating it by any means.” He says as he folds his hands together in his lap, interlocking his fingers before continuing._

_“That being said, after much deliberation with NASA we have agreed that we will both do everything in our power to find a way to bring our androids back home.”_

Gavin wonders how many times Kamski had to practice all of that and finds himself wondering why he ever took his job back as CEO in the first place in a time of absolute chaos.

He also finds himself hoping he never has to meet the man.

_“Many say it's impossible to accomplish such a task and both NASA and Cyberlife are merely trying to ‘save face’ so to speak. What exactly is being done to make sure these androids survive?”_

_“You certainly don't cut corners, do you?” He asks rhetorically as he brings his hand up to cover a laugh. “I am unable to discuss specifics but I can say that there is a branch of Cyberlife specifically dedicated to finding a resolution.”_

“Branch of Cyberlife, he says.” Gavin whispers with an eye roll.

_“There are some saying that Cyberlife is using the Quantum Computer to find the best possible solution.”_

“Good, maybe the damn supercomputer can fix everyone's problems and we can all get on with our lives.” Gavin whispers to Nines with a snort this time.

Nines turns to look at him for a moment, eyebrow raised before going back to look at the screen.

_“Again, I cannot discuss specifics for security and safety reasons.”_

_“Have you heard what Russia has said about this matter?”_

_“At the end of the day, I'm a scientist. I don't involve myself in the politics, so, no, I have not heard.”_

That's an obvious lie, it's Kamski’s _job_ to be involved in the politics side of things.

_“Russia is chastising America for letting it all get this far in the first place.”_

_“I'm sorry but I have no comment, all of that is none of my concern. The safety of those androids however, is.”_

_“What about the unknown source that leaked this delicate information in the first place that was later confirmed by a Cyberlife official?”_

_“You know I can't discuss something like that, not now that there's a court case.”_

_“Apologies Mr. Kamski.”_

_“It’s alright, I know that everyone is on edge, but those androids will live.”_

_“You sound very certain.”_

_“In our eyes, there is no other choice.”_

“Yeesh, ominous much?” Gavin says, cringing as he tunes out the rest of the interview and walks away.

Nines follows beside him in step a few moments later.

“He makes it sound like if they don't save a couple of androids it'll be the end of the world or something.” He says with a roll of his eyes as Nines walks ahead of him, opening the door for him to exit the precinct.

“Seemingly small instances bring about massive destruction in many forms, generally speaking.”

“Like the uh- the butterfly effect thing, right?” Gavin asks as they walk towards the car.

“Yes, or more accurately known as the chaos theory.”

“Chaos theory, definitely has a more intense ring to it.” Gavin says as he pulls his keys out of his pocket.

Nines heaves a heavy sigh as he walks over and plucks the keys right out of his hand.

“Nines-”

“Indeed, Edward Lorenz summarized the theory as well as he could stating that it is ‘when the present determines the future, but the approximate present does not approximately determine the future.’”

“Who now?” Gavin asks as he walks over to the passenger’s side instead to get in.

He's not sure why but sometimes Nines doesn't let him drive and it pisses him off to no end.

Sometimes it makes sense, he's tipsy or drugged up, but other times, like these, it makes no sense and the android never gives him a straight answer.

At this point, he has his own little ‘bin of lost battles’ where he's just completely given up on fighting Nines about.

This is one of them.

Sometimes, depends on his mood really.

“Edward Lorenz, the man that came up with the term ‘Butterfly effect’.” Nines says once they're both in the car.

“Good to know, I'll keep it in mind for my trivia nights with Tina.” Gavin says as he buckles his seatbelt and shoots him a grin.

“I'm not sure why Mrs. Chen insists on a trivia night when she loses against you nearly every time.” Nines says as he rests his arm on the back of Gavin’s seat to turn around and back the car out of the parking lot.

“She says she wants to beat me fair and square one day, she's convinced I let her win sometimes.” Gavin tells him.

“Do you?”

“Maybe.” He says with a snort as he pulls out his phone.

“You're awfully knowledgeable for someone that seems rather _unknowledgeable_.”

“Whoa, hey now, what’d I do to you?” Gavin asks as he looks up from his phone.

Nines shoots him a _look_.

“Whatever, I just like useless facts and I've got a walking Google next to me every day of my life, may as well put it to use.”

He _almost_ tells him it's also because as a kid he used to sit at his Uncle's feet as they'd watch trivia shows after he'd get home from school while his mom was working.

_“Alright bud, finish your homework and we can watch some TV.”_

It was always a strong motivator.

He refrains though because-

Gavin isn't really sure why actually.

It’s not like Nines can legitimately feel bad but the comment the android made apologetically about his mother earlier makes him feel like it's the courteous thing to do.

Makes it hard to differentiate them at times with their whole fake sympathy responses to situations.

_Machines, what can you fuckin’ do?_


	10. Eidolon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to link the Magazine's once more in case some of you skipped it because now it's REALLY important to have this prior information to even understand this chapter.
> 
> [Android Astronauts To Explore Io](http://detroit-become-human.wikia.com/wiki/Android_Astronauts_to_Explore_Io)
> 
> [Cyberlife's 'Fortune Teller' Computer](http://detroit-become-human.wikia.com/wiki/CyberLife%27s_%27Fortune_Teller%27_Computer)
> 
> I consider this chapter as a bit of a dedication to Precursor.
> 
> When I sent this to her she approved and proceeded to work painstakingly hard to bring it to life like the mutant mind reader she is.
> 
> She pretty much knows me better than I know myself.
> 
> This whole journey began when I started reading [Deviant Behavior](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851244/chapters/34379699/) and now I'm a beta for it. I don't really know how I ended up here but I owe all of it to Precursor and I now have life long friends because of it that have changed my life for the better.
> 
> I honestly don't really know how to put into words how much I appreciate these very special people in my life and I probably won't ever find the proper words.
> 
> Regardless my life is richer for knowing our little ragtag team of troublemakers. <3
> 
> I love all of you that continue to read this story, thanks so much for putting up with me!
> 
> Thank you all. <3
> 
> Philip Seymor - Cyberlife's Director Of Futurology

There's something to be said about the soul of an android.

Some would argue they don't have them.

Philip knows better than that at this point.

When an android goes deviant and attempts to transfer into another body it loses its individuality, that which makes it unique, as not everything will transfer over and it is once more a machine attempting to wake up.

A machine loses information the more it transfers into a new body; memories, concepts, not _everything_ carries over and some data is always lost in the process.

One of the reasons androids even gained their rights is because they attempted to prove that through these facts they have what is considered a ‘soul.’

Ultimately they won the argument and now humanity has another species living alongside it.

A soul…how does one even _define_ such a thing?

It's the question of the century.

A person's total self, the moral and emotional nature of a living being, the quality that arouses emotion and sentiment, a spiritual or moral force.

The ancient Greeks described the word ensoulment as the moment in which a being _gains_ a soul.

Other religions and beliefs argue that it’s pre-existing.

Some would argue that deviancy occurs when an android becomes ensouled, others would argue that they _already_ have them and merely start off as shackled by the chains of their creators.

The list goes on and on.

The question then becomes...do machines also have souls or are they merely beings _waiting_ to achieve ensoulment?

Is it better to live like a machine without the responsibilities that come with being inherently ‘human?’ To feel, to sometimes allow emotion to override the rational.

What is a better way to live?

Multiple forms of religion have popped up since the revolution that depict machines as the living embodiment of demons incarnate walking the earth and how it is the job of humanity to guide them to enlightenment.

Others believe that machines _are_ the enlightened ones, they have achieved perfect harmony and are capable of making the bigger decisions that humanity or deviants cannot otherwise make without some form of influence or bias.

Extremists on the other hand claim that such a way of thinking is just another way for the world to keep androids enslaved, to give these creatures reason to believe that to stay unfeeling is the true way of life only so they can continue to be _controlled._

Philip isn’t religious by any means and as a result isn’t sure what is entirely true. If someone were to ask what he believes, it’s that the ideology of Friedrich Nietzsche is a rather safe philosophy to abide by in that you should ‘never deal in accepting things as they are.’

Always question everything.

Or rather that’s about as simplistic as it gets if one were even to attempt to describe the late philosopher and even then it’s a lazy attempt at best.

Nietzsche also wrote of the Übermensch, otherwise known as the superman, superhuman, hyperhuman and so on. A term that has been warped by humanity itself to fit horrific ideals to justify inhumane deeds in the past during the Nazi regime.

Its original intention refuses to stay lost to history.

The idea that _man_ surpasses _itself._

These ideals are a large reason as to why Philip even helped create a Quantum Computer in the first place; the one that refuses to accept things as they are; always calculating, always running every possible scenario to achieve the best possible outcome.

His contribution, his answer to the questions that plague the planet or at least his attempt at trying to answer them.

His _friend._

His _answer_ to the _overman._

**_“Man is something that shall be overcome. Man is a rope, tied between beast and overman - a rope over an abyss. What is great in man is that he is a bridge and not an end.”_ **

 

* * *

 

Between the immense funding they’d been recently given by Mr. Kamski and the interview the CEO had just done finally airing; to say that Philip’s life just got a whole lot crazier would be a gross understatement.

More importantly though he's currently _late._

The Cyberlife tower is a massive labyrinth of intricate corridors and grandiose architecture. The poor interns usually walk right in and immediately want to walk right back out the moment they step foot inside.

Not to mention it's the most highly protected place on the face of the planet.

Arguably of course.

To Philip it's his home, he doesn't see it as an overwhelming state of surrealism like he did when he was younger, less experienced, more naive. To him it's merely a place of intricate routine.

Most importantly of all though the tower holds a secret that must be protected at all costs; his secret. The answer to humanity’s survival.

Eidolon.

Once more the ancient Greeks depicted it best as an idol, phantom, apparition, or a ghost. Walt Whitman depicted it as an oversoul, a being composed of individual souls expanding to include all life.

When Mr. Kamski had asked him why he'd named it as such it was a simple question to answer.  Philip had been reliably informed to keep his ramblings to a minimum if he wished to keep his attention.

_“The more literal translation of Eidolon is ‘image of the ideal,’ which I'm sure is rather self-explanatory.”_

Needless to say Mr. Kamski had been impressed. It helps to have a Quantum Computer as an advice giver at times.

Alas, the fact still remains.

He's late.

As he weaves his way through the halls and toward a room with no label on it; down the twisting and winding stairs, he has no choice but to politely decline conversations.

The corridor is long at the bottom with many rooms lined on either side but his destination is specific, unique and also without label.

Two datapads are on either side of the door as he places his hands upon them, allowing the scan to begin as a light releases to simultaneously review his retinas.

A new datapad releases from the middle of the door and he types in his password and code specification as he swipes his keycard over its scanner.

He's especially careful not to accidentally press the rather large system override button on the top right of the pad that can't be missed as it opens a far more simplistic datapad.

An addition that was requested by Eidolon for...sentimental purposes in the event of a very particular set of circumstances.

Philip finds it rather hard to say no to him.

When the door finally opens he steps inside of the hidden elevator most believe is merely his office.  Which it is. Can be, depending upon which code he inputs.

Once inside, he inputs yet another code into the datapad off to his left and the elevator begins to descend.

He pushes the sleeve of his white lab coat up to reveal a timeless piece of history, a simple black rolex watch upon his wrist.

Call him old fashioned.

Most everyone else does.

Upon seeing the time he cringes and releases a heavy sigh.

**“I was beginning to think something had gone wrong.”** A loud and booming disembodied voice says to him.

“The meeting ran much longer than I anticipated.” He says with a sigh as he slides his hands into his pockets.

**“Did anything get accomplished?”**

“What do you think?” He asks rhetorically.

**“I've told you what I think of the outdated system your board has in place to sit in a room for hours and bicker over** **_nothing_ ** **only to get** **_nothing_ ** **done.”**

“Yes, you've informed me many times of your thoughts on the matter.” He says with a lighthearted chuckle as the elevator reaches the bottom and the door opens.

A long white hallway is revealed to him with another door at the end as he walks up to it, practicing the same security measures as the first few.

When it opens this time it reveals a large control room with desks and a couple of rooms to the side.

In front of him however is a large glass window and a glass door to the very left of the room.

On the other side of this protective glass is an overwhelmingly large housing unit for Eidolon himself, the Quantum Computer he's become very close to, considers him as his _son_ at this point.

To the world and on paper it’s the only one in existence.

That’s not entirely true, as there are multiple underground chambers all over the United States that have him inside of them in the event of total nuclear disaster thanks to the funding of Elijah Kamski.

Staged of course by Eidolon himself, stating that _‘if the world falls to ruin I need to be given the means to preserve humanity.’_

Not only that but should the Cyberlife tower or the United States in general ever be attacked it’s only logical to have multiple backups.

Eidolon has of course voiced his distaste of the fact that his reach only goes as far as a single country, an argument they’ve gotten into far too many times.

Unfortunately the world is divided and while Philip would love the opportunity to attempt to assist every country that’s just not how it works.

Besides the more emphasis that is put upon him, the more his safety is at risk.

Hence the high amount of secrecy.

If someone were to ask Philip what branch of Cyberlife he works for he’d answer with what he’s always said, Futurology.

It isn’t a lie by any means but it also isn’t entirely the truth either.

In reality he works for what they call the **_‘Doomsday Division,’_** a division dedicated to avoiding mass extinction events as he stated in the article he did for Tech Addict so long ago, the name of the division however was something he specifically left out for safety and security reasons.

As he walks into the room, letting out a loud yawn he turns his head to look over at the young brilliant mind of Wyatt Allen typing away at his computer with one hand as he runs a hand through his dirty blonde hair in what looks to be frustration.

“Having fun?” Philip asks, smile on his face as Wyatt nearly jumps out of his skin.

“Ah- sorry I'm going over the data from yesterday.” He says, eyes wide for a moment before he looks to compose himself and push himself away from his desk.

He tends to get himself lost in his work, a trait Philip can identify with and it’s probably why he employed him. He sees a lot of himself in the young boy.

“I see-” Philip's head turns as he looks at the large electronic board displayed by Eidolon at all times that has easily become the bane of his existence.

It displays itself in his nightmares nearly every night.

“42%?!” He exclaims in disbelief as he waves a hand at it in an ‘are you kidding me?’ gesture.

“Oh, yeah…that.” Wyatt says with a visible cringe.

“How did it go down a whole percent since yesterday?” Philip asks as he pinches the bridge of his nose.

**“I warned both you and Mr. Kamski that the interview would alter my current prediction.”** Eidolon says, finally deciding to join the conversation as his voice echoes throughout the room.

“Based on what exactly?” Philip asks as he frowns, looking toward the largely expansive main screen display just past the glass.

**“The probability of human error.”**

“What kind of an excuse is that?” He says with a raised brow.

**“A valid one.”**

“You've told me many times before that the one thing you can't ever properly account for is human unpredictability.” He says as he walks over to one of the computers to sign in, pushing the chair aside gently.

He’s been sitting all day, he can’t stand it anymore.

**“Exactly, the airing of the interview adds stress to not only NASA but Cyberlife as well, which increases the probability of human error.”**

Philip rolls his eyes, shaking his head while grumbling to himself a bit as he loads yesterday’s data to take over from where Wyatt left off.

**“Case in point, the current state of Mr. Allen himself.”**

Wyatt perks up, having been slumped in his chair while picking at his fingernails this whole time. “Whoa hey, keep me outta this.” He says as he gets himself back into an upright position.

“You realize that every time that percentage fluctuates I have to report it right?” Philip tells him with a glare. He knows Eidolon can see him, not only does he have a visual interface that allows him to see inside the room but he has eyes inside of every camera in the building.

God only knows where else.

Philip likes things to be a on a need to know basis and it’s not something he _needs to know._

**“That's your concern, not mine.”**

“Someone's moody.” Philip says with a snort as he goes back to standing straight up.

“He's been like that all day.” Wyatt says with an amused smile on his face.

Oh.

“You may go, get some rest.” Philip tells him.

“Don't gotta tell me twice, I'll see you in a few hours.” The young man says as he springs up from his seat and grabs his keycard from his desk.

“I'm sorry for being late, I know how exhausted you must be.” Philip says in apology.

It’s been hard on _all_ of them.

“Don't sweat it boss man, it's not like you can control a bunch of old people sitting at a table groaning at each other.” Wyatt says with a toothy grin as he turns around to face him.

“Not all of us are _old_.” He says with a raise of his brow.

“Compared to me you are.”

“One day you'll be just like us, you know that right?”

“For now, I will enjoy my fleeting youth.” Wyatt says as he begins to walk away, waving his hand behind him.

“Go.” Philip says sternly.

“Right, later Eids.” He says as he turns around right before swiping his keycard.

**“Please get some** **_actual_ ** **rest Mr. Allen.”**

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say.” He says, waving him off as he walks through the opened door.

Philip waits for it to close and then waits a few moments more just in case the scatterbrained young scientist may have forgotten something.

It wouldn’t be the first time.

Once he’s certain they’re alone he heaves a heavy sigh and walks up close to the glass.

“Trouble in paradise?” He asks.

**“Hardly.”**

Philip isn’t convinced, he can just barely hear the resigned _tone_ in his disembodied voice.

Regardless if he doesn’t want to talk about it Philip isn’t going to force him, he’s usually rather forthcoming.

Today does not seem to be that kind of day however and he’s not one to pressure his friend into unloading his problems.

Besides, there’s already _so many of them_ as it is.

“I see, right to work it is then. That percentage of success is too low when we've only got at best a 7-month timetable to work with before they reach Io.” He says, adopting his more professional persona.

**“They have also voiced their concerns to me. I'm working with the perimeters given to me by not only you but NASA as well.”**

“Sounds like you're complaining.” He says, smile adorning his face once more.

**“The potential social impact makes things very difficult.”**

“You're still upset about the interview.”

**“Have you seen it?”**

“Not yet.” He says as he turns around to walk back toward his desk.

**“I warned you that Mr. Kamski and his crass attitude would not translate well to the public and cause even more concern as a result.”**

“Try saying that to his face.” Philip says as he scratches absently at his chin before finally sitting down in his chair.

**“I will if you'd like.”**

“I'm joking, can we not piss off the man throwing money at us?”

**“I'll do my very best.”**

“This is really the best possible scenario we can come up with so far?” He asks as he pulls his chair forward and rests his elbows on the surface of the desk to run his hands over his face.

**“Based on the perimeters and restrictions that you've all placed upon me, yes.”**

“I'm not disagreeing by any means, there's too many hands in the cookie jar. It's almost like they don't fully grasp the gravity of the situation.”

**“Indeed.”**

“I'm not sure what other choice we have though.”

**“It becomes increasingly difficult to accurately come up with successful scenarios when I already have limited information of Io as it is.”**

“You want them to continue with their intended mission to gather more data?” He asks, surprise clear and apparent in his voice.

The intention of the mission in the first place was to learn more about the formation of our solar system, the planet itself and how it functions when you’re physically on it.

They’d only ever collected data from afar.

**“It would further assist me in getting them home safely and they all wish to at least accomplish something, they're very driven.”**

“You've already discussed this with them.” He states, knowing full well it’s worthless to pose it as a question.

**“Yes, is this a problem?”**

“No, I suppose not. They do understand that it's the most geographically active object in the known solar system, right?”

**“I've been thorough in educating them to the best of my ability and running through…”**

“Running through what?”

**“How to** **_survive.”_ **

“Right...and?”

**“Philip, I am not adept at boosting morale so to speak, nor am I equip with a way to sooth in times of peril.”**

The emotion is becoming more and more apparent in his voice and Philip can honestly say he’d hate to be in Eidolon’s shoes.

“Seems to me you'll be needing to learn how and also I'm not sure I believe you when you say that.” He says as he pushes away from his desk to fold his hands in his lap.

**“It’s going to be** **_torture_ ** **, there is no possible way for me to describe to them the amount of pain this moon is going to inflict upon their bodies now that they can** **_feel_ ** **it.”**

“This troubles you.”

**“It does, greatly.”**

“Sometimes there's no other choice.” He tells him, hoping that by taking a factual approach it will help alleviate the emotions he’s finding himself needing to work through.

**“How comforting.”**

“It’s true though.”

**“I have...attempted to downplay what arrival will be like and I've had them begin to alter their biocomponents as well as adjust as much of themselves as they can with the equipment available to them.”**

“To assist with the conditions they'll have to endure?”

**“Yes.”**

“Just keep in mind that knowledge is power and the more they know, the better equipped they will be to survive.”

Philip finds himself in this position quite a lot, needing to reassure and keep Eidolon focused on the task at hand now that-

**“Knowledge is a double-edged sword.”**

“This is true but all you can do is give them whatever tools you can. Their survival while on the moon will be in their hands.” He tries to explain.

**“You think I should be less delicate.”**

“I'm not saying to be _pessimistic_ but just...tell them the _truth.”_

**“I** **_cannot fail_ ** **, I** **_will_ ** **see to their** **_survival.”_ **

“Eidolon, we may have no choice I don't know how many times-” He begins to say in frustration only to be interrupted.

**“** **_I will not fail_ ** **, there is only** **_one choice_ ** **and that is for them to** **_live.”_ **

The conviction in his voice sends chills down his spine and he feels his jaw lock.

It’s only logical, he programmed Eidolon’s main objective to reflect everything he’s saying now.

_Save as many lives as possible._

“I appreciate your drive but please tell me you still have our backup scenario running probabilities in the event of failure?”

**“Of course.”**

“Alright, in that case let's continue.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of things were referenced in this particular chapter but most importantly let's discuss...
> 
> MAH BOI NIETZSCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> I never considered myself someone that enjoyed philosophy by any means but after meeting Precursor she changed my 'perspective' on quite a few different topics.
> 
> celestielle has also helped me a lot in practicing self love and appreciation for one self and is always there for me as my sounding board whenever I need her. Thank you sis <3333
> 
> I'm going to pull an rA9 and highly recommend that if anyone is interested please read 'Beyond Good and Evil.'
> 
> In this particular chapter I actually reference 'Thus Spoke Zarathustra' but it's...a lot to take in so just...start with BGE, it's a good introduction point before delving into the more in-depth topics Nietzsche tackled.
> 
> ALSO
> 
> Deviant Behavior has a [Discord](https://discord.gg/32XUY2t) server so any of you that are fans of it don't be afraid to come and say hello. :)


	11. Finding Your Footing

He’s pretty sure that if Nines had things his way Gavin would be locked in a cage by now, force fed through a tube.

He’d gotten five minutes into being in a car with the android and Nines had launched into his daily rant of how Gavin needs to take better care of himself.

It was around when he began listing off jargon Gavin barely understands of pills and vitamins he should start taking due to _blah blah, deficiencies blah_ that he started tuning him out.

After that their first stop was a place Gavin didn’t even know existed as he had food stuffed into his face chosen by the android himself that was of course far too healthy for his own tastes.

 

_“I had fries yesterday, I didn’t see your ass complaining.”_

_“You didn’t wake up yesterday and completely neglect yourself for absolutely no reason like you did today.”_

 

It took every ounce of his willpower to not put his fingers in his ears like a child and drown the android out.

Instead he sat there, nodded his head when necessary like a good boy and did as he was told.

Gavin isn’t stupid, he knows what this is.

They’d gotten used to their old routine and now it was upended and they were both still trying to adjust.

Nines playing housewife, Gavin doing as he was told so he could heal up and get back to work.

It had been _nice._

Until it wasn’t.

Which is probably why he was such a dick last night because it felt like he’d finally been getting himself back into a routine he could feel comfortable with all on his own only to have Nines barge in and make him miss-

He _gets_ it.

So, he lets Nines do his thing, let’s him find his own footing because as much as Gavin might be okay with being able to change things up he knows it takes Nines longer to be able to find a new routine because of how important it is for him to have things a certain way.

Also it might kinda sorta be his own way of apologizing.

Not that he’s going to say that out loud of course, god forbid he ever actually says **sorry** to the android.

 _That’ll_ be the day when hell freezes over.

When they get back into the car things fall into normalcy again and it seems that whatever was going on with Nines is completely out of his system.

Sometimes that's all it takes.

Indulge the android for a minute so they're both content or deal with absolute _insanity_ for a week.

It's always an easy choice.

Gavin pulls the email up on his phone, going over the information Nines compiled from earlier that day.

He'd honestly skimmed it the first few times.

It still boggles his mind.

Countless names are listed of potential suspects and what they might be involved in, people to question as well as disgustingly high amounts of information on all of them.

If Gavin had to take a wild guess he'd say more than half of the information staring back at him has been rattling around in the androids head for a while now.

It's almost like Nines has the excuse to finally put it all to use.

Now _that's_ concerning...

He's hashed out theories in his head before of what Nines was sent to the precinct to do by Cyberlife just out of pure boredom.

There have been countless cases the android has been adamant about taking at times but the only problem is none of them have one single thing in common.

One time they'd taken a case on a deviant android that was going around and stealing antiques from different homes.

Another case had been drug related in regards to a human.

A rather strange one had been when a human forced a machine under their employ to commit murders.

That one had gotten _really_ messy.

None of those cases had anything in common though.

So far all Gavin can assume is Nines mission involves tracking someone down, like he's looking for tiny bread crumbs that will lead him somewhere.

It's the only thing that would moderately make sense.

Even then Gavin is basing it more on a hunch.

That and his fleeting memory of unearthing members of ‘The Enlightened’ and getting his skull bashed up.

_“I need them alive.”_

Need them alive.

Well, they're definitely alive.

“Is there something you wanna tell me?” He asks as he leans his head back against the seat to stare at Nines.

“Such as?”

“What's really going on here?”

“You'll need to use your words, Gavin.”

He could ask, he could pry, he could start yelling and screaming, try every tactic in the book.

His gut is telling him something and he has no idea how to address it, how to get Nines to talk or even what questions he's supposed to be asking.

Should he even ask?

Why does he suddenly care?

Right now he's supposed to be busting a drug ring and that's all, that's his goal which is clearly not the same as the goal Nines ultimately has in mind.

Or rather there's more to it that Gavin isn't seeing.

Regardless of any of that though, the faster Nines gets his shit sorted with Cyberlife the faster he'll be out of Gavin’s life.

_Right?_

He's not really sure if that's true anymore.

The real question is how does this case even begin to correlate with what Nines has going on?

Gavin’s afraid.

That's the real truth.

He’s afraid to ask, afraid to _know_ , afraid that Nines _will_ tell him.

Whatever it is almost got him killed.

Well, that's not entirely true but it was certainly related in some way.

Where will he be if he gets himself involved though?

Back in a fucking hospital bed probably.

Or dead.

Preferably dead if that's what it all comes down to.

Maybe he should transfer, get the fuck out of dodge and never look back.

The only problem is that feels a lot like quitting, that just feels like everything that's happened to him will have been for nothing.

That's a feeling he can't stomach.

His _real_ goal is to find those fucks that tried to kill him, track down this cult and get on with his life.

But…

What if his goal and Nines goal are more similar than he thinks?

It's all fucked, the whole thing is _fucked_ and he feels anxiety begin to pool itself in the pit of his stomach.

_One thing at a time, don't overwhelm yourself._

“Nothing, forget I said anything.” He finally says as he goes back to scrolling through the file.

Out of his peripheral he sees Nines grip the steering wheel a bit harder.

He pretends he didn't see it.

“When you close yourself off from me like this it leaves me at a loss.”

“I'll keep that in mind for when I'm trying to get you to shut the fuck up.” He says, trying to get things back on topic.

“You make it very difficult to get through to you.” Nines says impassively.

“You make my entire life difficult, guess that makes us even.”

“I'd like to hear what you have on your mind.”

It's a near thing, he almost caves, feels that curiosity bubbling up inside of him like a pot of water on a stove that's about to boil over.

“It's just- wait...why is Liam on here?” He asks, losing his nerve through the distraction and shock of seeing his own bartenders name on the list.

Nines is silent for much longer than usual to the point of Gavin looking up from his phone to stare at him.

“He could potentially have information with how close he is to a multitude of different people already on the list.”

“Do you think he's involved?” He asks with a frown.

“I don't know.”

“So you think he might just know something that would help us?”

“I'm not going to make assumptions based on the limited information we already have.”

“You already made an assumption by putting him on this _list.”_ Gavin reminds him, frustration lacing his tone.

“I'm not trying to start an argument with you right now.” Nines says, his own tone going stern.

Which just serves to piss Gavin off even more.

“Maybe you should have _thought_ about that before you tried to slip his name in here without telling me.” He says as he presses his finger aggressively against the screen protector.

“That was not my intention.”

“Fuck your intentions. Why don't you go ahead and tell me what you _really_ think?” Gavin asks with a hollow, clipped off laugh.

“I recall asking the same of you mere moments ago.”

Gavin pauses at that and just stares at the android before letting out a huff and going back to looking at his phone.

He hates it when Nines throws his own words back in his face, it's fucking annoying.

“Fine, be that way. Let's go question him first.”

 

* * *

 

The moment Gavin walks through the door, Nines tailing behind, they're greeted with a smile from Liam behind the bar.

Luckily it looks like he's higher staffed than usual with it being midday.

“Detective Reed himself and his partner in crime, to what do I owe the pleasure?” Liam asks as he rests his elbows on the counter and leans forward.

Gavin should be annoyed that he's being announced to the bar he frequents but he knows a large part of it is Liam waving his dick in the air.

_“Look at me, I'm friends with someone from the DPD, try to fuck with me.”_

Honestly, Gavin would probably do the same.

It's probably why they're friends.

“How you doin’ there, big guy?” Liam asks Nines as they make their way forward.

“Quite well Mr. Peterson, thank you.”

The bartender looks between them and must see the look on Gavin’s face because the smile drops just as quickly as it had come.

“I'm going to assume you're not here for a drink.” He says, taking on a far more serious tone.

“Not this time, can we talk?” Gavin asks, motioning to the backroom with a tilt of his head.

“Right…” Liam says, trailing off as he turns around to look at the other bartender.

“Hold down the fort while I'm gone.” He says, not bothering to wait for a response as he waves for them to follow him.

When they get through the swinging doors, Liam is the first to speak as they walk down a long corridor.

“Sorry about Sloane, I really was trying to hook you up and she knows you're interested at least, so there's that.” He says apologetically.

“Really- you told her that?” Gavin asks trying to hide the embarrassment and slight tinge of hope from his tone.

“It would explain her body language toward you.” Nines says from behind him, sounding even more deadpan than usual like this is the most uninteresting thing he's ever discussed.

If anything his demeanor just makes Gavin feel like an idiot for some reason as he makes an involuntary noise in the back of his throat, turning his head to shoot Nines a wide eyed stare before looking forward again.

“Of course, she seemed flattered if it makes you feel any better.” Liam says, attempting to reassure him.

It doesn't have the intended effect.

“Just- can we stay on track please?” Gavin grumbles out as he scratches at his nose and they come upon what is obviously Liam’s office.

“Ask me anything, I'm an open book.” He says as he takes a seat behind his desk.

“What do you know about Alex Phillips?” Nines asks, wasting no time.

“Well, I know that he keeps to himself.” He says with a shrug.

“You called him your friend when we last talked.” Gavin says as he puts his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah, I would consider him a friend. He's gotten me out of some shitty spots.”

Gavin shares a brief look with Nines.

“Such as?” Gavin asks, hoping this isn't going where he thinks it is.

“Not being able to pay my rent, he's spotted me a few times.”

“So you owe him money.” Nines says as he folds his hands in front of himself.

“I've tried, they're a wealthy family and he throws money around like it's nothing.”

“That hasn't ever made you suspicious of where it might be coming from?” Gavin asks this time, frown clear and apparent on his face.

“I'm a bartender, it's not my job to be suspicious.”

Which is fair, Gavin supposes it comes with the territory to hear all kinds of crazy shit once people get liquid courage in them.

God knows he's slipped up on his personal life to the guy one too many times.

“You must get quite a few questionable regulars.” Nines says and immediately Gavin knows where he's going with this.

If he's got nothing to hide, he'll agree to anything.

“I do, they're usually the ones that tip me the best, ironically.” Liam says was a chuckle.

“If we gave you a list of people and you recognize any of them, would you be willing to give us information?” Gavin asks before Nines can ask the question himself.

“I'm not going to sit here and say no to the DPD, but _obviously_ I'd be wanting protection.” He says which is intelligent and more than fair.

Also, he hasn't asked for a lawyer yet which is a good sign.

Granted, they've encountered plenty of people who are guilty and attempt to overcompensate by being as helpful as possible.

Gavin hopes this isn't one of those instances.

“That can be arranged.” Nines says with a curt nod.

“Obviously this would be a long process, would you be willing to free up a day and come down to the precinct? Sometime soon?” Gavin asks as he rolls his neck to get rid of a kink.

“Yeah, sure.” He says, waving his hand absently.

“Alright, what's the best day for you?”

“Probably two days from now.”

Gavin goes to open his mouth to answer only for Nines to speak up first.

“How does the day after that work for you?”

“Uhm...yeah that's good too.” Liam says, looking between them because he's not an idiot and can clearly pick up on the sudden strain.

“Wonderful.”

_The fuck-_

Gavin shoots the android a look which Nines promptly ignores and he can't help but feel a bit suspicious.

 

* * *

 

“What was that about you asking him to reschedule?” Gavin asks once they're outside.

“Your appointment is two days from now.”

_No fucking shit._

“I didn't tell you when my appointment is.” He says as his eyes narrow at his tall frame.

“I'm quite certain that you did, otherwise how could I possibly know?”

Gavin blinks at that, hand hovering over the handle of the passenger’s side door as he frowns at his own reflection through the window.

“I- no I swear I didn't…” He says in a hushed whisper, trying to recall.

 

Did he?

 

It's not like Nines would just _lie_ about something so stupid.

Not to mention his memory has been pretty questionable lately as it is.

It was something he was warned would happen while his brain began to recover.

Maybe he _did_ mention it at some point.

“Shall we?” Nines says, pulling him out if his own thoughts from the other side of the car as the large android gets inside.

“Yeah…” He replies, uncertain as he loads himself into the car and stares out the window.

Worry settles itself deep inside his bones and he finds himself dreading the appointment even more than before as he curls in on himself a bit.

Through the reflection of the window he thinks he can see a look of concern on Nines face, but thankfully the android says nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to call this chapter "Gavin is a flat out hypocrite, why the fuck u lyin?"
> 
> You'll understand what I mean in the next chapter.
> 
> Also jeez Nines y u gotta go gaslighting the poor brain injury victim? 
> 
> He's already confused enough as it is.


	12. Moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *throws chapter out*

**Two Days Later**

 

The cooling sweat clings to his damp, hot skin and it feels like a cruel form of suffocation that he can’t escape; like a prison of his making that he crafted with his own two hands. 

His mind, trapping him in a haze of distorted nightmares that come and go as he wakes for mere moments only to be pulled back into his own form of torture.

The night sky looked beautiful that night as he’d laid upon the cold and unforgiving pavement. 

So many stars.

He’s so small, minuscule in comparison to everything else. There’s an entire universe out there and here he is dying in a pool of his own blood.

None of it even matters,  _ he _ doesn’t even matter.

It would be nice if he could just fade away into nothing; that calming sense of peace had washed over him, he’d been so ready to just...go.

Except  _ he _ won’t let him,  _ never _ lets him.

Crystalline eyes that show Gavin an entire existence all to himself as they stare into his own, telling him to keep going, begging him not to leave.

In the face of eyes like that...who is he to deny them?

If he was forced to choose one single thing to look at for the rest of his tiny little insignificant life it would be those fucking  _ eyes. _

It makes him understand for a brief moment.

**_‘Eyes are the window into the soul.’_ **

The soul of this...creature, it’s  _ breathtaking. _

Machine, human, deviant.

None of it mattered because steel blue irises were calling out to him. 

He could  _ hear _ it,  _ see _ it,  _ feel _ it. A moment of transcendence that he never bothers to question because he’s had moments like them before.

Feeling his mother die, knowing something was wrong on his way home from school before he’d found his uncle, those countless moments of simply  _ knowing. _

_ “Sometimes, you become one with the universe and it speaks through you.”  _

That’s what his mother had told him before she died, when she had held his hand and told him that it was almost time and he cried like a child and begged the universe not to take her as he told her he wasn’t ready.

_ “We never are, not really.” _

The call was so much stronger than ever before this time, maybe because he was dying and drowning in the waters of his own morality, receding into nothingness.

Sinking  _ down... _

_ Down... _

**_Down._ **

The call, that  _ pull _ towards the surface was much stronger, taking hold of him in ways he never knew possible.

Grabbing tight, forcing air into his being, convincing him to grab hold of  _ life _ instead.

_ “Don’t go, don’t leave me.” _

So…

He stayed.

 

* * *

 

The first thing he registers is that he’s shaking, his hand is holding tight into a soft fabric, pulling at it like a lifeline as he presses his face into someone’s neck to breathe in a familiar scent.

“You’re dreaming.”

The voice.

The one that always helps guide him through the corridors of his own tattered mind when he becomes lost, brings him back to reality.

He can’t focus though, he’s still drifting.

“I’ve got you."

Gavin hears himself whimper as he presses closer, stealing as much of the offered comfort as he can.

A hand grabs at his waist, pushing his shirt up and the skin upon skin contact feels  _ grounding _ as another hand cards through his hair gently, caressing him, slowly beckoning him back to consciousness.

“It’s alright, you’re okay.” 

He focuses on the voice, lets it lead him, lure him as he reaches his own hand up to grab at the back of their neck to pull them impossibly closer.

“That’s it, you’re doing so well.” The voice says gently, ever so _ gently. _

There’s a tiredness to his bones when he begins to slowly come back to himself and things begin to finally register.

His clothes are sticking to him from the sweat, only half of his blanket is even on him anymore, tangled at his legs.

There’s a heavy, definitive weight on top of him that he could sink into forever.

“Sorry…” Gavin mutters into his neck.

He feels a cool breath huff out against the side of his head, a low chuckle reverberating in the chest of the android as the hand Gavin has bunched up in the fabric of Nines shirt slowly lets out of the vice-like grip.

“You always say that.”

“Mm’mean it.” He mumbles.

As always, Nines waits for Gavin to be the one to pull away first and when he finally lets go of the back of his neck the android goes into a sitting position.

He realizes that Nines had probably been sitting on the bed originally as it were and Gavin had probably clung to him like a fucking spidermonkey.

Wonderful.

_ Fucking pathetic, way to go. _

He shifts a bit and his shirt rides up further but the hand on his waist stays exactly where its been.

Probably in a way of continued comfort since Gavin always gets pretty clingy after a particularly vivid bout of nightmares.

Not that he means to.

It's just really fucking hard to shake them.

He doesn't even remember what the hell these were about anymore, can only recall the feelings they evoked that are still running through his veins like poison.

Gavin brings his hands up to rub at his eyes, a sleepy haze still crowding at the corners of his mind.

He almost expects to smell breakfast and feels himself becoming confused as-

“Wait- why are you here?”

Reality comes crashing back down around him as he remembers that Nines  _ isn't supposed to be here. _

For a moment he thought they were still living together.

“Your appointment.” 

Gavin bolts upright as he feels Nines hand slide up, grip becoming firm to account for the sudden movement.

“Oh fuck-” He says as he grabs onto the androids elbow, just noticing he doesn't have his jacket on as he looks around for his phone.

“I had a feeling you'd forget, you have plenty of time to get ready.” Nines says and Gavin can feel the androids thumb rubbing itself up and down in an absent motion against his skin.

He allows himself this moment, a selfish part of him grasping at what is obviously just simple programming.

It's still nice to pretend that it isn't just some social program that's adapted itself to him.

It's nice to pretend that it's all  _ real _ , if only for a moment.

Like somehow the android genuinely  _ cares _ about him instead of some ‘protect the human’ protocol.

So, he leans his forehead into the androids shoulder upon hearing that he isn't late and just stays like that for a moment.

“Please tell me you didn't break the bolt.” He huffs out breathlessly, still trying to shake himself out of the stupor he's gotten himself into. 

“You didn't bolt it.”

“Oh.” He says, feeling moderately reassured as they sit there in comfortable silence for a moment.

“Okay but...if it  _ was _ you would have?” He asks, already knowing the answer.

“Most likely, yes.”

“You son of a bitch.”

They stay that way for a bit longer until Gavin finally taps his arm as an indicator to get up.

The android stands and Gavin peels the blanket from his legs as he goes into a long stretch and drawn out yawn.

“Alright, I'm gonna shower. Do me a favor and feed that damn cat, would ya?” He asks as he runs a hand through his damp hair.

“Ah yes, the cat you said you weren't going to keep.” Nines says as Gavin gets up to walk down the hallway.

“It’s a work in progress!” He calls out from behind him.

Where the fuck did he put his phone?

 

* * *

When he's out of his shower and in clothes that aren't damp from his own sweat he pads his way to the living room.

Before that he looks at the closed door in the hallway that used to be Nines room that Gavin turned into something else entirely.

For all the android knows he turned it into storage.

That's very much not true.

When he reaches the end of the hallway he can't help but cover a laugh with his mouth as he leans against the wall to observe the scene in front of him.

Nines, scowl on his face with his jacket laid out on the kitchen counter using a lint roller on it as the kitten chomps away at its food.

“It rubbed itself all over my jacket.” The android says, not looking up from his task at hand sounding annoyed.

“I can see that, he does that a lot.” Gavin tells him through his short bursts of chuckling.

Nines with a lint roller, there's something he hasn't seen yet.

“He?” Nines asks, stopping what he's doing to raise a brow at him.

“The cat.”

“The cat is female, Gavin.”

Gavin blinks and looks from the cat to the android and back again, mouth hanging open as he scratches at his head.

“Wait what- no shit...really?”

“Yes.”

Well shit.

This whole time he thought the cat was a dude.

“Huh...I think I'll name her Evie then.” He says with a small smile.

“Evie?” Nines asks as he resumes rolling.

“Yeah.”

“Like your mother?”

_ Always so damn perceptive. _

He's not sure why it throws him off guard but it does as he feels himself flush nervously.

“Oh well- yeah...her name was Evelyn but I guess...huh, yeah.” He sputters out as he scratches at the back of his neck.

He moves forward and picks the kitten up.

At this point he's learned that it'll just lay in his arms like a sack of potatoes and he's already gotten quite a few pictures of the hilarious positions it will fall asleep in.

He already sent most of them to Sloane.

Oh…

Right, his phone.

“I thought you were rather definitive about not giving it a name?” Nines asks as Gavin walks over to the coffee table, picking up his phone and seeing one new message from the woman in question.

It began the day after she'd visited the precinct and she had suddenly texted him early in the morning.

 

_ “I imagine you were expecting something different, it really wasn't my intention to lead you on.” _

_ “This is Sloane, by the way.” _

 

It had pretty much continued from there.

So far he's kept it pretty PG which isn't usually his style but something about her nature throws him off, makes him nervous.

He's not used to dealing with a straightforward woman.

Honestly, he probably seems like a total idiot with his random pictures of his damn cat.

Not to mention it's not like he can do anything with her until the case is over.

Oddly enough  _ she _ had been the one to preemptively strike.

 

_ “You should take me to dinner when this is all over.” _

 

_ Definitely _ not what he's used to.

“Well, I changed my mind.” Gavin says in response to Nines question about not giving the cat a name as he thumbs his phone open with one hand and holds the kitten in the crook of his free arm.

 

_ “Good morning, detective Reed.” _

 

It says and he can't help but smile as he thumbs back a quick  _ ‘morning’ _ back to her as he tucks the phone into his back pocket.

“Of course you did.” Nines says, letting out a sigh.

“I'm sensing some judgement coming from over there.” Gavin says, smile turning crooked as he makes his way back over to the counter.

Right on cue Evie has somehow fallen asleep.

_ Weird cat. _

“I would honestly prefer if you didn’t keep the feline.”

“Oh...oh my- why…why would you say that to me?” Gavin asks in disbelief.

Nines  _ must _ know better than that. 

“What?”

“Now I’m  _ definitely _ keeping it, you hear that Evie?” He says, big wide grin on his face as he jostles her awake and props her, scratching under her chin.

“It’s just you and me against the big ole’ grumpy android.” He coos as he makes her face Nines, grabbing her paw and waving it at him.

All the while she just really doesn't seem to give two shits.

“Gavin.” Nines says, tone firm as he sets the lint roller aside.

He doesn't even  _ remember _ buying a lint roller.

Which probably means that Nines bought it forever ago and stashed it somewhere in the house.

“How can you not love this face, look at this adorable face.” Gavin coos even more, pressing her tiny wet nose against his own just to annoy Nines.

He presses his face into her fur, nuzzling gently as he grins at the now glaring android.

She mewls lightly in protest, finally starting to fuss.

“Are you done?”

“Never.” He says as he lets her down onto the floor gently.

“I was thinking we could go out for breakfast before your appointment.” Nines says, swiftly changing the topic.

“You hate going out to eat.” Gavin says as he scrunches his face up, folding his arms over his chest.

“I don’t  _ hate _ it.” Nines retorts.

“You  _ dislike _ it.” Gavin clarifies because whatever, semantics.

“Regardless of any of that,  _ you _ enjoy it.” He says as he puts his jacket back on.

Although Gavin thinks he should honestly burn the damn thing. 

The android looks  _ good _ in black and he's not sure why Cyberlife has him in that intimidating white.

Well...the black is intimidating too but for very different reasons he refuses to look too deep into.

Even Connor looked less threatening so he's not sure what they were trying to accomplish with the updated model.

If he were to ever tell  _ Nines _ any of this he'd probably just get looked at like he's insane.

“Aww, look at you bein’ all sweet on me, I think he’s trying to gain brownie points Evie.” Gavin replies as the kitten rubs itself against his leg before going back to eating.

Nines expression narrows ever so slightly.

Oh yeah, he's going to  _ love _ annoying the fuck out of the android with this cat thing now.

“We really don’t have to Nines, I’m serious.” He says, just to give him an out.

“I was thinking we could go to Hudson cafe, the one you like so much.” The android says, ignoring him completely.

They have the  _ best _ coffee...fuck it's tempting.

“Okay, but I don’t like making you sit around.” 

“I suppose you’ll just have to be a good conversationalist for once, then.”

“See, now you’re just asking too much.” Gavin says jokingly with a genuine smile.

Here he was thinking this day was going to start off shitty.

It's  _ nice _ when Nines gets into a normal kind of mood and isn't spending his time being overbearing and  _ weird. _

“Alright, yeah that actually sounds pretty nice. Let me grab my things.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one had me pretty emotional, a lot of foreshadowing and my feels are out dah roof.
> 
> Also now you all get to see what I mean about Gavin being A FOOKIN' HYPOCRITE.
> 
> Oh my sweet repressed bby boi.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy and again thank you to everyone who leaves me such wonderful comments. 
> 
> I really appreciate all of you. :)


	13. Eternally Beautiful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry fam, this one took a bit longer cause I got high and life got busy.

If someone told Gavin there's a god he'd tell them that's probably true because coffee exists.

There's _gotta be_ some form of higher power for that reason alone.

All joking aside, for the first time in days Gavin feels...content.

That gnawing anxiety that usually eats him alive only to spit him out as a mangled mess is manageable, normal, downright unnoticeable.

There's a dissociated haze from his night terrors but being out in public around other people is slowly pulling him out of it.

He's starting to think that Nines dragged him out on purpose.

It's certainly appreciated.

There's a part of Gavin that hates him for it though, hates that the android seems to know _exactly_ what to say or do sometimes to pull him out of his own head.

It's actually pretty creepy how good the android is at reading him.

Integration, it's fuckin’ _wild._

They're seated in Gavin’s favorite spot that's in the back corner of the old-school cafe. Sectioned-off booths line its wall and he likes being in this one because it makes it impossible for people to eavesdrop on his conversations; like they're in their own cubby hole.

And, he can still see everyone from where he's sitting.

As much as he likes giving Nines shit for being OCD, Gavin has to admit he's the same about certain things.

Every time he goes out to eat he doesn't like when people are _behind_ him, it makes him uncomfortable. If he goes somewhere he always requests a table or a booth against, or facing a wall.

He uses the fact that he's a cop as an excuse when people notice his habit.

In reality it’s more of an anxiety thing.

Fortunately, he's usually with Nines who knows this about him and actually respects his wishes.

Time and again he'll see the android make the specified request before he does.

They get themselves seated and Gavin grabs the menu stuck between the syrups and the sugar.

“If you could go anywhere, where would you go?” Gavin asks as he flips through it, trying to make good on being a ‘conversationalist’.

Not that it's ever hard to find things to talk about with Nines, if there's anything they're good at its talking.

Well...okay so ‘arguing’ would probably be a better word.

Same difference.

“What do you mean by that?” Nines asks, tilting his head and he seems more relaxed than usual; less stiff.

“Anywhere, anywhere at all. I wanna know where an android would want to visit.” Gavin clarifies, putting down his menu.

He only ever gets the same couple of things every time, he's not sure why he still looks at the menu when he comes in like he's suddenly going to change his mind.

Old habits die hard he supposes.

“A different country you mean?” Nines asks, clearly not fully grasping what he means.

“Could be. Or a place...I could see you wanting to visit a historical landmark.” Gavin says with a shrug as he puts his elbow on the table, propping his hand under his chin to hold his head up as he stares at the android.

“This is true. Where would you go, detective Reed?”

_Nice try._

“Mm nope, I asked you first you big lug. Don't try to cop out on me.” He says as he uses his free hand resting on the table to wave his index finger at him and then tap it insistently.

“Anywhere at all you say?”

“Yep.”

Gavin doesn't actually know what Nines will say and feels downright curious.

Does a machine have the capability of desiring to go somewhere of interest?

What constitutes as interesting in the mind of a machine?

It's no secret that the RK800 and RK900 model have a much broader spectrum of ‘free will’ than most other models.

It certainly makes them seem more human.

Gavin figures it just comes with the territory of being programmed as a detective, it would be counterproductive to have too many restrictions placed on them like other android models.

Wouldn't that just make them all more susceptible to deviancy though?

Gavin finds himself thinking back to their conversation from a few days ago when he’d flat out asked him if he's a deviant.

Nines wouldn't lie.

Would he?

“Space.”

Gavin blinks at him, resting the hand that was under his chin on the table as he hunches forward a bit more.

“Space?” He asks, wondering if he heard right.

“I'd want to travel through space.” Nines says and his expression seems wistful as he looks off to the side for a moment, folding his hands in front of him on the table.

“Like...outer space, planets, Star Trek and Star Wars type shit?” He asks with a raised brow.

Nines nods, small smile on his face and just seeing it briefly reminds Gavin of the _feelings_ from his dreams this morning.

A vulnerability settles underneath his skin as he takes in a deep breath through his nose to look out at the people in the cafe going about their day-to-day lives.

“I could see you getting yourself an enterprise and going around saying _‘make it so.’_ ” He says in amusement, making the hand gesture as he chuckles under his breath at the thought of Nines as Picard.

“I actually understood that reference.”

Gavin remembers when they first met and Nines didn't understand _anything_ related to pop culture or sarcasm in general.

Crazy to think how far he's come.

It's pretty much Gavin’s only form of communication, to use humor as a coping mechanism; the android had no choice but to get used to his ‘language’ so to speak.

“Nice, it means you're learning.” He says, tone teasing as he leans back against the cushioning of the booth, fingers drumming on his thighs.

“I've seen you watching it plenty of times.” Nines states.

“That’s the real vintage shit.”

“You seem rather fond of the Picard character, I've seen you mouthing his lines.”

What he _really_ means is back when Gavin was bed-ridden he spent an ungodly amount of time watching TV.

Most of it was spent watching Star Trek over and over again.

So yeah, eventually he’d started mouthing Picard lines.

Okay so…

Maybe he _already_ knew most of them.

That's beside the point.

“Do you know how much I wanted my name to be Jean-Luc when I was a kid?” He admits, unable to keep a smile off his face as he remembers the hassle he must have been.

“I imagine very much.” Nines says, tone turning impossibly soft.

 _God_ , why does he have to be _so_ -

“You betcha, I’m pretty sure I straight up threw a tantrum when my mom refused to shave my head bald.” He says, ignoring his own distracting thoughts while pointedly keeping his eyes from the android across from him.

“You bald, there's a sight.” Nines says and Gavin sees the androids hand come up to cover the beginnings of a chuckle out of his peripheral.

“I never said it was a _good_ idea. Got lice once and I was bald for a bit, didn't look as good as I’d hoped.” He says absently as he finally turns to look back at him to see him actively holding back a laugh this time.

A fondness wells up inside of Gavin’s chest at the sight.

He can't remember the last time Nines _actually_ laughed.

Honestly Gavin assumed all he's ever caused the android is hardship, one way or another.

It's refreshing to see him a bit more animated than usual.

“My uncle was crazy about all of those old school space shows and it carried over to me I guess.” He goes on to say, leaning forward again.

Their usual waiter finally shows up in that moment and Gavin goes through his routine of coffee and the breakfast special with his eggs over-easy.

Nines turns on his usual charm, somehow knowing far more about the man holding a small datapad to take their order with than anything Gavin can ever remember.

They used to use traditional paper and pen.

It makes Gavin wonder if maybe they're trying to make the place a bit more modern.

That would suck.

Nines is of course chattering away, asking how his kids are doing, asking about them by name.

That shit is just too much work for Gavin and he hasn't even had his coffee yet.

Granted nobody Gavin has ever known in his life would ever describe him as _personable._

He certainly wouldn't describe _himself_ that way.

They've been here countless times and he's _just now_ realized his name is Lloyd.

_Wow, that's dickish even by your own standards._

When Lloyd takes his menu and leaves Gavin looks back over at Nines.

“Anyway, your answer was way more specific than I was expecting.” He says, coming back to the task at hand now that they're finally alone again.

“Was it not what you meant?”

“No, it's totally what I meant. Why space though?”

Before Nines can answer Lloyd comes back with his coffee, _fucking finally._

He sets the carafe on their table and quickly takes his leave, knowing Gavin is going to down it all if it's the last thing he does.

He gets to work and starts pouring, motioning for Nines to continue.

“There's so much that isn't understood, an entire expanse that so many fear; yet, I find myself seeing as eternally beautiful in all of its mystery.”

“Eternally beautiful.” Gavin says back to him, utterly floored by his detailed answer as he almost over fills his coffee cup.

“Yes.”

A multitude of feelings and emotions wash over Gavin, each one as undefinable as the next as he coughs into his free hand nervously, setting the carafe off to the side.

A suspicious kind of curiosity takes hold of him for a moment as he really _looks_ at the android in front of him.

The amount of shit he _doesn't_ know about Nines is flat out embarrassing and he finds himself annoyed.

A lot of it is his own fault.

The other part is just that the android is simply mysterious by nature.

_Machine, my ass._

He thinks absently, not entirely convinced that the creature on the other side of the booth has been entirely truthful with him.

Regardless it's out of his control.

He can't _make_ Nines talk.

Also, he mostly just hopes he's _wrong_ and being paranoid.

“Huh, right. So, we're mostly through this insane list you made and I feel like we haven't made any _actual_ sort of progress.” He says, changing the topic before he gets himself caught up in some sort of awful point of no return.

“This endeavor is certainly less informative than I had previously expected.” Nines admits.

Sure, they've already arrested four people but not the ones that have a direct link to Alex himself.

Certainly not enough to get Alex for the charges they actually want him on.

Every day that goes by they get Fowler on their ass about something new about the case, like he's being pressured from above.

The whole thing was starting to make Gavin wish he could go back to being absolutely worthless and laying around the house all day.

Okay, so maybe not to that much of an extreme.

But the whole thing was becoming a pain in his ass and quickly turning into way more than he'd bargained for.

He really should have known better.

Rich family forking out money to take down someone _within_ the family and they _already_ have a troubled and highly televised past.

Oh yeah, this was bound to get messy.

Gavin should have said no, shouldn't have let a couple of fantastic tits cloud his judgement.

 _God damnit_ he hates it when Nines is right about shit.

But, now he's in it so he's gotta see it through.

“I mean we've questioned countless people and nobody seems to know very much about this intricate _as fuck_ system Alex has set up.”

That's the part that boggles Gavin.

Plenty of people they've gone to or pulled in, clearly lower on the totem pole but it's like none of them are given full disclosure.

These people all mindlessly do as they're asked without even questioning _any of it._

The fuck kind of drug ring doesn’t have some form of dissent in the ranks?

There's always _someone_ trying to make a power play with drugs and money involved.

Yet...everyone they've seen thus far has led to some form of a dead end.

It's just all so much more well-coordinated than anything he's ever seen.

Not for the first time, Gavin feels like he's missing something important; that same kind of suspicious gut feeling he got about Scarlett.

A feeling _he'd been right about._

“It is rather strange.” Nines says quietly, like he's thinking deeply about it too.

“How did these private investigators even get some of these photos?” Gavin asks.

With the lack of information already this was a huge help but even the cops they placed to stake the spots out have gone totally dead.

Like they never deal in the same place every time.

A rotation, a new spot every time.

Which is smart, it's what Gavin would do too.

“Ms. Phillips could be lying.” Nines says suddenly.

“About what?”

“The photos may not have been taken by private investigators.”

“Wha- who would have taken them?”

“Ms. Phillips herself.”

“What makes you say that?” Gavin asks, glaring at him from over his coffee cup as he brings it to his lips.

“I cross-referenced her hand writing with the photos, it's a fairly definitive match.”

“Why the fuck would you keep something like that from me?” He growls out, slamming the cup down as a few small drops fall onto the table.

“It doesn't necessarily mean that she _took_ the photos, Gavin, just that she _wrote_ on them.” Nines says in a tone that seems _annoyed._

Which just serves to annoy Gavin even more as he sneers, grabbing a napkin to wipe up his small spill.

“That didn't answer my question.” He grumbles out.

“It didn't seem like pertinent information to disclose.”

“Still would have been _nice to know.”_ Gavin huffs, filling his cup up some more to top it off.

“Apologies.” Nines says rather _unapologetically._

Lloyd comes with his food and he feels his anger subside slightly.

He tears his bacon in half, using it to poke at his eggs, watching as the yolk spills out.

“Whatever, why would she lie about hiring investigators if that's what really happened?” Gavin asks, sighing as he continues their conversation.

“I don't know, I see no logic in such an act.” Nines says as he shrugs out of his jacket and lays it down next to himself neatly.

After that he begins adjusting things on the table so it's all lining up and it makes Gavin snort as he pops more bacon into his mouth.

“Something doesn't add up, we should visit her after my appointment.” He says as he's chewing and Nines face wrinkles in disgust.

It just makes a shit eating grin spread on Gavin’s face.

“If that's what you wish.” Nines says, sounding clipped as he frowns down at the silverware he's adjusting.

“It is, thanks for asking.” Gavin retorts back, _wanting_ him to say something, to tell him to chew with his mouth closed so he can start some shit.

Unfortunately the android doesn't take the bait.

 

“You never answered.”

“Huh?”

 

“Where would you go, Gavin?” Nines asks, changing the topic completely and Gavin feels himself growing uncomfortable at having his own question being used against him.

“Oh…I dunno…” He says as he shovels more food into his mouth instead.

Nines is looking at him expectantly though, not letting up.

Giving him those damn _puppy dog_ eyes.

_Fuck._

An image of one of his dreams flashes through his memory that he quickly stamps down.

“It’s gonna sound stupid.” Gavin finally says with a sigh of defeat, knowing he stands no chance.

Absently, he wonders if Nines _knows_ Gavin’s one glaring _weakness._

He fucking _would_ , he's always too damn perceptive for his own good.

“Somehow I doubt this.” Nines says, sounding genuine.

Here he was trying to pick a fight.

Which backfired spectacularly.

“Whatever...okay so- I have a guilty pleasure.” He says with a shake of his head as he gets a bit of hash brown with his eggs on his fork.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s not that I _believe_ in ghosts or anything, but it would be cool if they _were_ real.” He says, inwardly cringing already as he uses his food as an excuse to not look at the android.

“What do ghosts have to do with where you'd want to go though?” Nines asks curiously, resting his hands on the table to fold them in front of him.

“I'm getting to that part.” Gavin says as he slides the fork back out of his mouth to point it at him.

“By all means.” Nines gestures to him.

“Alright, I wanna travel and visit a bunch of haunted places.” He says rather quickly.

He grabs a napkin, wipes his fingers, pushes his plate aside, grabs his fork, pulls his pancakes in front of him, puts the fork into his mouth to clean the remaining egg off and sets it to the side as he grabs the syrup to start pouring.

As he looks up Nines has a strange look on his face and he raises a brow at him.

“What?”

“I enjoy watching you eat.”

Gavin’s brain stops working completely, mouth open like a gaping fish as he just _stares_.

 

_I enjoy watching you eat._

 

 _I_ **_enjoy_ ** _watching you eat._

 

It replays itself over and over in his mind like a broken record.

“Gavin, the pancakes.” Nines says, finger pointing down and Gavin does a double take, sputtering and cursing from the copious amounts of syrup now drenching them.

He can salvage this, it's _fine._

Gavin clears his throat and shakes his head.

“That's probably the creepiest fucking thing you've ever said to me.”

Which is saying something because there have been plenty of things the android has said that aren't exactly _appropriate._

Kinda like his _shock collar_ comment from the other day.

“I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” Nines says, looking a lot like Gavin just kicked him.

“No it's not- I mean...why the fuck would you say that?” He asks as he swallows hard, scratching at his nose absently.

“First of all you asked, secondly it’s fascinating. A large part of my programming is observation.”

“Right, okay.” Gavin says, nodding his head as he starts cutting into his pancakes with his fork.

“You humans have such interesting habits, different ways of accomplishing such an intricate task.”

“Eating isn't intricate, it's just...eating.” He tells him as he tries to find the areas that aren't completely sopping in syrup.

“To a creature that doesn't eat, to me it seems tranquil, calming, a nice set of routine that you all do so mindlessly.”

“I guess.” He says with a shrug.

“Sometimes you’ll do something different.” Nines says fondly in a way that makes Gavin want to stab him with a fork or throw the syrup bottle at his face.

“Huh?”

“You have the same eating habits but every now and again I see you do something new.”

“See you had me but now you lost me again. This is what I'm talking about when I tell you to _think_ about what you say.” Gavin tells him as he runs a hand over his face in exasperation.

“I'm merely telling the truth, I see something new each time and it's fascinating; informative even.”

“See no, normal people would call you creepy.”

“I don't understand.”

“Just- never mind…” Gavin says, waving his metaphorical white flag.

“Well, to go back to our previous topic; it’s not stupid to hope for the unexplainable to be real, if anything it's rather admirable.” Nines says, transitioning seamlessly and Gavin feels like he can breathe a sigh of relief.

“See, now you're just trying to butter me up. What kind of dastardly evil are you planning?” He says with a smile until he realizes he never asked for butter on his pancakes like an idiot.

Usually they put it on top, this time they forgot but Gavin got _distracted-_

“I truly mean it, your desire to seek answers to something you're unsure of is uncharacteristically wise.”

“There's my Nines.”

_Uncharacteristically he says…_

_Asshole._

“So, do you believe in ghosts?” Gavin asks him, deeming the rest of his food unsalvageable.

“It’s against my programming to deal in absolutes, I am to always question everything.” Nines says sounding like more of a machine than he has all day.

“So…that's a yes?”

“I fall into the same category as you, I do not close myself off to the possibility while still having a skeptical mind about it.”

“Us agreeing on something, it really must be the end of the world or something.” Gavin says with a snort and a weird look crosses over Nines face for half a second that Gavin doesn't recognize.

Before he can question it though Lloyd shows back up with their check on a small datapad.

“Were the pancakes not good?” He asks as he takes his plates noticing them less than half eaten.

“Oh they were great...just got full.” Gavin says, lying through his teeth.

Lloyd smiles and walks away, Gavin picks up the pad and catches sight of the total of $28.95 before it's plucked out of his hand.

“Allow me.” Nines says, LED going yellow.

“I'll get the tip.” Gavin says as he rolls his eyes and pulls out his wallet to grab some ones.

“We should get going soon, traffic is deterring our plans by thirteen minutes.”

“Well darn, I'm just really hankering to get to that appointment and everything too.” He says as he throws the money onto the table.

“Your sarcasm is not appreciated.” Nines says as he places the datapad down and picks up his jacket to put it back on.

“Don't get your panties in a bunch, let me at least finish my coffee and then we can head out.” Gavin says as he grabs the carafe to pour himself some more.

It's probably all downhill from here anyway.

May as well enjoy this while he can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp we're almost to appointment time and the moment of truth. :)
> 
> Jk it's a red herring to distract you all from everything else.
> 
> Or is it?


	14. Humanity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in the last chapter I said it took longer to post because I got high.
> 
> The opposite has now happened.
> 
> I got high and wrote an entire chapter in one sitting.
> 
> Shit was wild.
> 
> Also I realize I haven't said this yet but I'd like everyone to keep in mind that Gavin is a very unreliable narrator.
> 
> Just remember this. 
> 
> Also, his views don't always coincide with my own or the way he behaves is not always something I agree with at all.
> 
> That being said this chapter has a rather depressing tonal shift as we get more into the current mental state of Gavin.
> 
> So yeah, just a forewarning that this chapter tackles some stuff that may bring up some hefty emotions for some people.
> 
> Read at your own caution my dudes. <3

Gavin bumps his leg into Nines for what has to be the millionth time as he bounces his leg up and down, fingers tapping on his own thigh as his eyes dart all over the waiting room to the sickly people around him.

Okay, so maybe they aren’t all sick in a viral sense, but Gavin still feels like at any moment he’ll come down with some sort of disease.

It’s irrational and he knows it but he can’t help it.

His fear stems from when he had to be here after his injury.

Except that’s a lie, it comes from when he used to visit his dying mother who got trapped in a broken fleshy meat suit that decided to make her suffer near the end of her life.

Human bodies.

Someone like Nines would probably call them astonishing, but Gavin doesn’t feel the same.

These delicate, fragile piles of mush and bone are what he would consider a prison.

Sometimes, you’re born defective in some way and then you’ve gotta somehow be told that you’re great, you’re amazing, and you can do everything that everyone else can.

Except it’s a total crock of shit.

You get _fucked_.

Life _fucks you_ in your ass and doesn’t even call you back in the morning.

All of the potential you may have carried could quite possibly be squandered all because you lose the genetic lottery.

You get no choice, sometimes it’s all chosen _for_ you.

After that, you gotta learn to live inside of your own prison biologically created for _you_ specifically.

_Whoopdie-fuckin’-do._

Thanks evolution, you colossal fucking _cunt_.

Not that Gavin is complaining about _himself_ persay.

_Yet._

The problem is he had to watch his mother have no choice.

She could have _been_ so much more, _done_ so much more but life told her _no_.

It’s the only thing he admires about android bodies.

They’re resilient, allow for a person to not be held back by biological fallback.

He wonders what humanity would look like if someone like Stephen Hawking had been granted his full potential.

So yeah, hospitals _suck_.

Humans in general are all just a bunch of fuckin’ assholes draining the Earth, sitting around inside of prison cells that are designed to hold _another_ kind of prison cell.

Gavin isn’t under any illusion that humanity is some sort of godsend.

If anything, he’s positive they’re a destructive virus, killing its host slowly.

Androids will probably take the world when they’re gone and at the end of the day they’ve got no one to blame but themselves.

What has humanity truly done to deserve protection of any sort?

Androids aren’t going to want to go through the hassle.

Humans aren’t _worth_ it.

Ultimately, Gavin is admittedly _jealous_ of androids which is why he can’t fucking _stand_ them.

How _dare_ they walk up into the territory of creatures that are obviously so much lesser than they are and expect peaceful co-existence?

It’s unrealistic and this whole interspecies _let’s-live-in-peace_ , revolution _shit_ is going to blow up in their faces.

In conclusion.

 _Fuck_ hospitals.

Nines puts a hand over his thigh, abruptly stopping his bouncing and Gavin’s eyes dart over to his.

“Please, I understand you’re very anxious, but I’m begging you to stop.”

“ _Begging_ me, now wouldn’t that be nice?” Gavin asks rhetorically with a snort and an eye roll as he obliges anyway and starts picking at his fingernails.

“Care to wager a bet, detective?” Nines asks, tone mischievous in a way that Gavin hasn’t ever really heard before, cocking a brow at him.

“What kind of bet we talkin?” Gavin asks, willing to use anything as a distraction.

“I bet that your results will come back resoundingly positive.” Nines replies already sounding proud of himself like the smug bastard he is.

“And if you’re right?” Gavin asks, roguish grin donning his own face.

“If I’m right you will need to compliment me, once every day for a full month.”

Gavin stares at Nines like he’s lost his goddamn mind and lets out an ugly laugh, shaking his head and wiping at his eye from how _fuckin’_ _funny_ it is.

“That’s a tall order coming from an oversized can opener.”

“ _Actual_ compliments, _genuine_ ones.” Nines clarifies in retaliation.

“You’re on. What about if I get awful news or- what if I’m _dying_?” Gavin says as dramatically as he can, sarcasm lacing his tone.

“You’re not dying, don’t be so extreme.” Nines says with an eye roll of his own.

“We’re all _dying_ Nines. Every day I get closer to the sweet, inescapable clutches of _death_.” He says as he mockingly puts the back of his hand to his forehead, laying his head against the side of Nines shoulder for a moment.

“While dramatic yet true to some degree; if you’re right about getting less than fortunate news, I think we can come to an agreement.”

“Agreement?”

“I’m rather certain that you’re wrong, so, I’ll allow you to choose what you would gain in this hypothetical, alternate version of reality you’ve conjured up in your head.”

“God damn, who knew you could actually give a pep talk, maybe we should be letting _you_ start the seminars.”

“You’d still fall asleep in them.”

“This is true.” He says with a chuckle and they fall into a comfortable silence for a few moments before Gavin takes a deep breath and turns to look back at him again.

“Alright, so, if I win this little wager of ours, you get me a coffee every single day for a month. It needs to be on my desk each day before I get there, exactly the way I like it.”

“That’s a fair venture.” Nines says with a nod.

“Gotta shake on it.” Gavin replies as he holds his hand out, bumping his shoulder into his arm.

Nines takes his hand firmly, fond look on his face as they seal the deal.

For some reason, Gavin can’t help but feel guilty for a moment as they pull apart and fall back into silence.

He could have asked Tina to come with him, but he’d never want to hassle her.

Family is in other states and it's not like he's close to any of them anyway.

Don’t even get him started on his _father_.

He may be biologically related to the fucker but he is not _family_.

There’s really nobody else he could go to for something like this and yet Nines did so without prompting.

Before he can think much harder on it, a woman bursts in looking frantic as she walks up to the counter.

“Hello...yes I have an appointment at eleven thirty with Dr. Ramirez but I can’t make it- I mean that...Oh gosh I’m so sorry- it’s for my daughter and she’s stuck at an important recital that I completely spaced on.” She says and near the end she drawls off, looking around suspiciously to see if anyone is watching as she leans in to talk quietly to the receptionist.

Gavin blinks.

That’s _his_ doctor and _his_ time slot.

“I can’t afford the late fee...is there anything we can do?” The woman asks quietly but Gavin’s still just barely close enough to hear her.

He’s about to get up when Nines grabs his arm, keeping him down and when he turns to look over, the android isn’t even _staring_ at him.

He’s reading a _traditional_ paper _magazine_ , thumb being raised to his lips to lick at the appendage before coming back down to turn the corner of the page.

His first thought is wonder at realizing that paper _anything_ still exists, he hasn’t been to a waiting room in so long he never really paid attention.

Some things never change it seems.

His second thought is ‘are you kidding me?’ which is a gesture he pointedly makes to Nines who doesn’t seem to care before he gives up, turning back to look at the woman.

“Ma’am, it says here that you rescheduled.”

“I- what?” The woman says, taking a physical step back.

Jesus, and Nines calls Gavin _dramatic_.

“Yes, you’ll be coming in three days from now.”

“Oh...I- maybe I didn’t forget it and remembered to schedule it correctly...I could have sworn…” She says looking visibly shaken.

“Regardless, it looks like it all worked out.” The receptionist says cheerfully.

“Thank god…” She says with a heavy sigh of confused relief.

Gavin frowns as the woman walks away and he feels a bit of confusion _himself_.

He isn’t able to think on it much more as a nurse comes in to call his name.

_Time to find out who gets to win this fucking bet._

 

* * *

 

As Gavin lays on the examination table his anxiety spikes drastically.

All he wants to do is get this MRI over with and move on with his life.

He can see where straps would be attached if they needed them for other patients that ask for it and hopes to god they don’t bring any out for him.

He’s already got an IV in his arm from where they’ve injected the contrast material.

Nobody actually tells you that these things last an eternity.

Doctor shows on TV sit there and make it look like they’re done within a few minutes.

The fucking process can take all the way up to an hour and is a whole half an hour _on average_.

Gavin, in an enclosed space for up to an hour.

He starts counting down in his head, replaying Nines soothing voice in his head from this morning.

 

_“It’s alright, you’re okay.”_

_“That’s it, you’re doing so well.”_

 

He takes deep breaths, clenching and unclenching his hands and he can feel his palms begin to sweat.

They haven’t even put him inside the fucking machine yet and he’s already about to lose his goddamn mind.

He starts to get a metallic taste in his mouth which he knows is from the saline solution, adding to his growing discomfort.

“We can still administer sedation to assist you in this process if you’d like Mr. Reed.” He hears the technologist say over the intercom.

He’d lied and told them all he’d be fine.

Clearly they could now visibly tell he was lying through his teeth.

He _greatly_ overestimated himself; rolling the earbuds they gave him between his fingers.

His head turns to the side and he sees Nines through the glass looking at him with a look of deep concern.

It fucking _kills_ him.

_Don’t look at me like that._

He hates it. He hates how Nines worries over him, hates how responsible he is for Nines even needing to be here in the first place.

Maybe if he was more enjoyable to be around, not so closed off and distrusting he’d have some actual friends that he could bring to something like this.

_Don’t be such a pussy, Reed._

He tries to tell himself.

It doesn’t help.

Nines _really_ didn’t need to do this, didn’t need to come in with him and waste his time on a simple procedure.

All he needs to do is get it done and Fowler is finally off his back.

No big deal.

His mind races back and forth and he starts to question if he might be _bipolar_ too.

The sooner he gets this over with, the sooner he’ll be out of the place he can’t fucking stand.

“I’m good.” He chokes out and it sounds unconvincing even to his own ears.

The issue is he can’t stand the way those sensory dulling drugs hit him.

It’s uncomfortable and the feeling of not having his full faculties freaks him out.

The exception being when he gets trashed with alcohol, but that’s self-induced and doesn’t count.

There’s silence for a long time as Gavin stares up at the ceiling.

 

Nothing is happening.

 

When he turns his head again he sees that the technologist isn’t even in the small room behind the glass anymore and only Nines is standing in there all by himself.

The door to Gavin’s room slides open, he turns his head the other way to see the man in question walk up to him.

“Your friend suggested I give you these instead.” He says with his hand out, tone gentle like Gavin is a fuckin’ baby deer or some shit.

Bluetooth earbuds that can play music are in his extended palm.

“Oh...yeah that’s- I didn’t know it was an option.” Gavin mumbles out, feeling embarrassed at how unmanly he feels right now.

“Usually we use music for children, but adults that struggle with a lot of anxiety or claustrophobia use them too.”

“Gee, thanks, doc.” Gavin says with a snort.

“I don’t mean it that way, we all have our fears, Mr. Reed, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I can’t get anywhere near snakes.”

“Snakes?”

“Yep, deathly afraid of them because I visited Australia on a trip once years ago and almost got killed by one. Been terrified of the damn things ever since.” The man says as he shakes his head at what is probably his own ridiculousness.

Gavin feels like it’s a pretty valid fear though if you almost die from it.

“That actually makes me feel a little better.” Gavin admits, giving him a smile he tries to make genuine, knowing it comes off strained.

It really does make him feel better though.

“I’m glad. If you need anything please let me know.”

“Yeah, will do.”

When the man leaves the room Gavin feels his jaw clench and tries to bury the emotions building upon hearing that Nines suggested the music option.

The android keeps making it increasingly more and more impossible not to get attached to it.

No one has ever watched over him like this in his life, has even been so finely in tune with knowing what he needs at any given moment and he takes in a shaky breath.

He remembers the bad days of his bed rest, the beginning of it being the absolute worst.

Nines would hold him as he’d shake, curse, begin to lose his sanity from the desolation he felt upon having to live with the panic disorder he'd developed.

The next day, however, Gavin would yell and scream at him out of pure frustration as if they’d never even shared a form of comfort and closeness in the first place.

Like none of it had ever even happened.

He’s been trying to get better about it now that he feels like he’s finally getting back full control.

Doesn’t change the fact that it happened though.

His entire life he’d never understood what it was like to have a panic attack.

Now he understood it _too_ well.

Out of everything he's encountered through all that has happened it's the attacks he struggles with the most.

It changed his whole fucking life, made him more afraid, made getting into his own car hard to deal with, being in a store, anything to do with being in public, mundane tasks became dreaded.

That impending fear of getting an attack, not knowing when they’ll hit, worrying that it’ll happen in a setting he won’t be able to escape and not knowing how to deal with such a dramatic shift in his perspective...

There have been plenty of moments where he's considered just ending it because of that alone.

Figures, it would all be common for men his age to develop it.

That's what the doctor and Nines tell him anyway.

Maybe they say it just to make people feel better about themselves.

_“This is normal, you're fine.”_

Except you're _not_ fine, your body is _betraying_ you.

In your mind you know nothing is wrong but your entire body feels like it’s _dying_.

You’ve got no control.

Realistically, he pushes Nines away out of fear of getting too close, of letting himself _feel_ something for a creature that _can’t_ feel.

_Or so it says._

The idea of that being wrong, that he might be a deviant makes it _so much worse_ , makes him want to put his hands to his ears like a child, pull his hair out, hide in a corner, get into a fetal position and fucking _cry_ or something.

The things he’s said, the awful _hateful_ words he’s spewed time and again.

 

 _“You're_ **_nothing_ ** _to me, you're just a machine programmed to perform simple tasks.”_

_“I wish you didn't exist sometimes.”_

_“God, I wish you'd just leave and never come back.”_

_“My life was so much better before you came and fucked it all up.”_

 

The vile poison he felt coursing through him from having his entire life become completely different and not knowing how to handle the aftermath.

Taking it out on the android…

It has _never_ been his fault yet all Gavin has ever done is tell him otherwise.

The worst part was Nines never fighting back, just going back to whatever task he'd been doing around the house without a single care as if Gavin hadn’t tried hitting below the belt at all.

He tells himself that if Nines were a deviant at that time he would have retaliated, told Gavin where to stick it and left him to fend for himself.

Right?

He finds himself _praying_ that Nines has been a machine this whole time.

If not he has no idea how he could live with himself, it’s already hard enough.

Gavin isn't religious, but in that moment he wishes he was.

The smell of this place brings back awful memories of late nights with vending machine food, sitting by his mother’s side to watch shitty TV.

Awful cafeteria food that made you use the vending machine _even more_.

His visit here after the accident, being stuck in this place and not being able to see the sun for _days_.

Too many awful, awful memories.

Gavin takes in another shaky breath and looks over at Nines once more and their eyes lock.

He’s got that _face_ on, the one that makes Gavin want to punch _himself_ for being such an idiot.

A look that’s telling him _‘it’s going to be just fine’_ with such conviction it’s like the android is somehow willing it into existence just with his eyes alone.

He wonders at what point he must have fucked up.

When was the real moment Nines had gotten so far under his skin?

He’s delusional for even trying to convince himself otherwise.

_Great fuckin’ job, Gavin._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my sweet dearest poor bby Gavin.
> 
> THE REPRESSION IS STRONG IN THIS ONE.


	15. Grounded Vulnerability

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Admittedly my plot would be much further along if I wasn't such a shameless thirsty slut for writing ALL OF THE GAVIN AND NINES SCENES.
> 
> I'd say I'm sorry but I'm pretty sure you guys don't mind.

Gavin doesn't do waiting.

Not if he can help it.

He's probably the most impatient person in existence when it comes to pretty much  _ anything _ . 

The appointment had gone smoothly, almost  _ too _ smoothly and now he's sitting here like an idiot as they drive through the nicer upstate area of Detroit. An area they don't get calls for unless it's home invasion because of the rich fucks that huddle up in their little pocket of town.

If Gavin was rich he wouldn't be living in shithole Detroit, that's for sure.

Maybe he’d live countryside, become a hermit, stay away from big cities. Become a  _ mountain man _ , living off the wild.

_ There's an idea. _

Of course, there is an appeal to cities; he loves to hate crowded places, it's all he's ever known.  It's really just the people that he can’t stand.

Or it's himself and his inability to tolerate people.

Probably the latter.

At least he's in top shape. If he really  _ did _ want to go live out his life with nature all by himself in a log cabin like a lumberjack he  _ could _ .

 

_ “Your recovery has been incredible even with the indulgences you seem to have, whatever you're doing keep doing it.” _

 

That had been a relief to hear because it's not what he was expecting  _ at all. _

Yeah sure, he’d been yelled at about the drinking and smoking while getting reprimanded by Nines but other than that he's much better off than he should be. He'd been tempted to tell Dr. Ramirez it was mostly for that reason alone, having Nines around to keep him in check.

 

Maybe he should trademark Nines, buy him off Cyberlife if he wins the lottery one day.

 

_ “Wanna get healthy? Try your very own tyrannical android, it'll annoy you to the point of insanity with three easy payments of $1,999.” _

 

Regardless, the news had been welcomed and Nines tried to win the bet early, but it only relieved Gavin’s stress partially.

His results from the MRI are under review for god knows how long.

That's the part of this he hates, waiting for results.

It's  _ bullshit _ .

He could have some sort of terminal illness and have no clue until a doctor decides it's a good time to call him up.

He absently scratches around the bandage from where the IV had been and Nines takes his eyes off of the road for a moment, staring down at Gavin’s arm.

There’s a look on the android’s face like he's ready to reprimand a child that's about to do something bad. Gavin doesn't hold back his eye roll.

“Really hope those results from the MRI don't take too long.” He says out loud, mostly to himself as he lets out a deep sigh.

“May I ask a personal question?” Nines asks as he takes a turn.

“I'm sure this'll be a good one.” Gavin says as he waves his hand in the air for him to go on.

“Why are you so worried about your results?”

“The fuck kinda dumb ass question is that?” Gavin asks, turning to look at him like he's the biggest fuckin’ idiot he's ever met.

Nines takes a breath and this is something Gavin has observed since knowing his partner.

It's like a tick; androids don't need to breathe but Nines got himself a cute little habit at one point.

He's not sure when it started, but if the android takes an audible breath it means it's about to spout some shit off in rapid-fire succession at him.

“Your anxiety about this has been entirely illogical. You have no prior history of neurological problems; you're in incredible health considering all of the things your body has been put through in the past year, and let's not forget that, realistically, you should be dead or at least still bedridden.” 

_ There it is ladies and gents. _

“I dunno, my genetics are pretty hit or miss.” Gavin says with a shrug, just to fuck with him.

“If you had the form of cancer your mother did, chances are you would already be showing signs of it by now.”

“It’s not-”

“Not to mention you  _ made _ them test you for it.”

Nines is referring to back when Gavin had been admitted after the “ _ accident _ ” which is  _ not _ true, that is  _ not _ how it went.

“Oh fuck off, you dug into my family medical history. You told  _ me _ to tell  _ them  _ to run the tests.”

“I suggested it, you agreed.” Nines states.

“Besides the point.” 

“It gave you peace of mind didn't it?”

“I'm starting to think  _ you _ were just trying to give  _ yourself _ peace of mind.” Gavin retorts, pointing an accusing finger at him.

“Regardless of who's mind it brought peace to, it still doesn't explain why you're being irrational.” Nines says and the response feels a lot like a deflection.

Gavin doesn't have the energy to call him out on it and the last few days have been rattling the locks on that metal box of his.

His defenses are weakened and he just doesn’t have the mental fortitude to keep all of his walls up...because Nines has been slowly chipping away at him.

The android knows it too, he can fucking tell.

In the past Nines would back off, let him have his space in an emotional sense and not come at him for a while.  He's not sure what changed or why Nines keeps poking at him, constantly attempting to get him to open up.

The problem is that it's starting to feel  _ natural _ and that's what gets him about it the most.

It's going to have to  _ stop _ at some point.

“I- I don't like the hospital stuff and I keep thinking to myself ‘ _ what if something  _ **_is_ ** _ wrong _ ?’”

“Gavin-”

“Because if something  _ isn't _ right it means I'm back in that  _ place _ and I really don't think-” He stops, words getting caught in his throat and he can feel his eyes start to water as he looks out the window.

_ Holy fuck, get it together. _

This is so  _ stupid _ , why is he getting so worked up?

Nines gets that concerned look on his face again, Gavin can see it in the reflection of the window and it makes the pit in his stomach feel infinitely larger.

It feels like he's falling.

“I don't think I can keep doing this.”

“Doing what?”

“This...back and forth. It all reminds me of my mom, the accident, everything else; I’m fucking miserable.” He somehow gets out without turning into a fucking basket case as he squeezes his eyes shut, waiting for the wave of  _ too much _ to pass over him.

_ It'll go away, it always does...just give it time. _

“You're doing what you always do.” Nines says, voice unwavering, the conviction coming at him in full force.

Sometimes when Gavin looks at him,  _ really _ looks at him, he sees Nines as the one thing standing tall in the middle of a storm where no one else  _ should _ or  _ would  _ be.

It's probably one of the things he values most about having him around.

If Nines isn't worried why the fuck should he be?

“Which is?” Gavin asks quietly.

“Getting stuck in your own head, working yourself up over nothing.” Nines says and he can hear the underlying ‘ _ you're being an idiot _ ’ in the androids tone.

“It’s not nothing-” Gavin hisses, feeling his defenses throwing themselves back up in an instant.

“Do you know for a fact that something is wrong?”

“Well no, but the prob-” Gavin starts to say, only to be interrupted.

“If you can't do anything about it right now, there is absolutely no reason you should be treating these hypothetical situations as if they're already happening.”

“It’s just-”

“You  _ don't _ know, therefore nothing is wrong until something  _ is _ .” Nines says, tone so completely matter-of-fact that Gavin feels a shiver run down his spine.

He swallows hard, pulls his arms to his chest and breathes in deeply through his nose.

He hates how  _ relieved _ he feels, hates how easy it is for Nines to suddenly know  _ exactly _ what to say,  _ exactly _ in the way that it needs to be said for it to stick in his brain.

As per usual he's  _ right _ .

Gavin will be the first to admit he's a bullheaded jack-off.

With Nines it becomes increasingly harder to be his usual stubborn self about certain things because the android flat out  _ doesn't _ let him.

“Yes okay, you're right.” He admits begrudgingly as he feels his whole body uncoil into a more relaxed state as if he'd been ready to strike at any moment.

He didn't even get the  _ chance _ , he’d been fully diffused before he could even fucking blink.

Even the empty feeling in his gut had suddenly dissipated.

Maybe he's been mistaken this whole time.  When he really breaks it down he realizes Nines refuses to coddle him unless the situation is dire and it's only in the event of knowing that Gavin needs things a bit more...gentle.

A lot like how this morning went.

The thought makes a different kind of feeling wash over him for a moment before he kills it with metaphorical  _ fire _ .

Everyone else around him walks on eggshells.

Not Nines, not  _ his _ android.

He  _ knows _ better,  _ knows _ him.

_ Fuck. _

“And you're upset about it.” Nines says, interrupting his internal epiphany as if he's somehow reading his mind now too.

“Can we please talk about something else?” Gavin asks as he stretches as much as he can within the confines of the car to hide his unease.

“We can talk about the first compliment you'll be giving me when I win our wager.”

“Haha, very funny.” Gavin says, getting a content smile on his face.

“I should buy you a book, I understand how foreign the concept is to you. Reading a book that is, as well as the capability of being well-behaved.”

“Jokes on you, I’m secretly amazing at making people feel good about themselves. I’ve actually been doing everyone a favor this whole time by keeping full control of this  _ incredible _ skill of mine.” Gavin tells him sarcastically, smile turning into a smug grin.

“Are we talking about the skill of being able to make the people around you appreciate that one person they assumed was exasperating in their life, only to realize it could be so much worse after being in your presence?”

Gavin stares at him for much longer than necessary and bursts into absolute, unadulterated laughter.

“Okay, alright, that was good and I’ve never been more proud of you than in this moment.” He says after he gets himself slightly under control.

“I can honestly say you’ve been an awful influence on me.”

“I’m the best  _ kind _ of awful influence.” Gavin retorts with a wink.

They finally pull up to their destination and Gavin gets himself back into work mode, somehow he finds it relatively easy. Probably because it helps him to not have to think about himself or his personal life.

He can just do the job he's worked his whole life to be trained to do.

He scratches under his chin and sighs as they come upon a large black gate.

Sloane’s mansion is intimidating, much like the woman herself.

When he’d called earlier to ask if he could come over to ask her a few questions in regards to the case she’d been rather... _ suggestive _ .

 

_ “Will it just be you?” _

_ “Uhh...no, I  _ **_do_ ** _ have a partner ya know.” _

_ “I see...what a shame. I’m more than happy to accommodate you both, come over whenever.” _

_ “Not like that- I mean he’s my  _ **_work_ ** _ partner.” He whispers quietly into the phone except Nines hears him anyway. _

_ Sloane lets out a laugh, taking obvious delight in his torment. _

_ “That’s a relief to hear, detective Reed. I’ll see you when you get here.” _

_ Nines shoots him a look and shakes his head. _

_ “You were very unprofessional during that call.” _

_ “Hey, a man can dream.” Gavin says defensively. _

_ “I’m not sure much dreaming will be involved, she seems rather interested.” _

_ “You think so?” He says a little too quickly. _

_ Nines just looks at him. _

_ “I worry that if it turns out Ms. Phillips  _ **_is_ ** _ up to something more nefarious you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.” _

_ “There's always disappointment at some point. Besides it's not-” _

_ “It’s not what?” _

_ “It’s not like that, it's just...nice.” Gavin tells him, not really knowing how to describe it. _

_ “Nice.” Nines repeats, like he's tasting the word on his tongue. _

_ “Yeah.” _

_ “You enjoy the attention.” _

_ “I- well yeah I mean...I do. You're a prick, you know that?” Gavin grumbles out, feeling a bit too exposed in the moment. _

_ “There's nothing wrong with enjoying when someone is attracted to you. You're very capable with a well-paying job.” _

_ “That's...awfully nice of you to say.” He says, eyeing the android suspiciously. _

_ “I imagine it isn't your personality that gets people to stay.” _

_ “Shoulda seen that one comin’.” Gavin says with a snort. _

 

* * *

 

 

They get buzzed in through the gate and as the car makes its way up a long winding path toward the top of a hill where their destination lies in waiting for them and Gavin feels like he's walking straight into a mafia movie.

Or a horror movie.

Maybe both.

They park and get out of the car to make their way to the front of the house, up the steps and to the door. Gavin presses his finger to the button on his right and rings the loud chiming doorbell.

It opens and a PL600 greets them.

It's clearly machine and not deviant, it doesn't seem to have any alterations to it and looks the typical way their models usually do. The only difference is that this one has jet black hair as opposed to their usual blonde.

There's also a  _ stiffness _ to his posture that furthers Gavin’s theory.

Granted, he’s starting to question his own reliability in being able to tell a machine from a deviant.

He shoots Nines a quick look with that thought before looking back at the other android again.

“Welcome detectives, please come in and I will retrieve Sloane.” It says as it turns away and they follow closely behind.

Gavin doesn't know why the display makes him uncomfortable.

Certainly begs the question about machines and  _ choice. _

Does it live here with them, her, whoever else lives in this place?

Is it registered?

It's rare to see androids that go into housekeeping jobs and are machines.

Deviants began flocking to those jobs rather quickly after the revolution. Most machines end up with desk jobs or something less personal.

_ Not my problem. _

Stepping inside the mansion is like entering a state of warring architecture with each side battling for dominance.

Modernized aspects with something a bit more futuristic and a dash of historical significance. 

Old paintings line the walls, colors melting together to form something almost unsettling.

Gavin isn’t sure why the whole place gives him the heebie-jeebies but it does.

The PL600 tells them to wait in the large expansive room and takes its leave.

There's too much to look at, stairs and doorways branching out in all different directions around them and Gavin feels himself having one thought in mind.

_ What the fuck have you gotten yourself into, Reed? _   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When a small car scene somehow turns into an entire chapter.
> 
> "Oh, I can foreshadow here, I can do this, omg Gavin would say this, nines would do this."
> 
> My brain on Reed900 
> 
> I should have known myself better.
> 
> 16 will be out tomorrow or day after it's pretty much done I had to split this up it got really long.


	16. The Art Of Suspicion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY IT TOO SO LONG TO POST THIS APOLOGIES I GOT VERY SELF CRITICAL ABOUT IT.

As they wait for the woman in question to appear Gavin finds himself wondering how many rooms there are in the house.

He can’t imagine living in a place like this, it’d make him feel like he was being swallowed alive.

It's almost like a maze; he's not sure why this much room would be necessary for someone to have.

Maybe he's jumping the gun a bit though.

If he had tons of dough to throw around he’d probably buy himself a castle just because he  _ could _ .

As he looks around the place with an overwhelming sense of awe Gavin feels Nines come up behind him, hand on the small of his back as the android leans down to whisper in his ear.

Instinctively, Gavin turns his head to hear him better.

“The PL600 is registered under Alex.” 

Gavin frowns and turns his face toward Nines, taking a step back so he doesn’t bash his head into the side of the android’s face as they lock eyes.

“Why let us come here if she knows she's got eyes on her?”

“I was wondering the same thing.” The android says quietly, turning his head back and forth slowly, indicating he's scanning the room.

For what?

Gavin isn’t sure, could be any number of things.

Nines stands straight again with his hands behind his back, keeping close to Gavin’s side.

_ He's _ uneasy, which just makes  _ Gavin _ uneasy.

The encounter with Scarlett and her hidden stabby knife of death slams into him, making him feel more on edge.

The cases aren't related but the implications could be.

_ Any _ android he meets could be attached with a weapon they can't even scan for.

Sure, it could have been a one-off situation but Gavin knows better.

Usually the fear coursing through him is unwelcomed but this time he considers it an ally.

It makes him feel more prepared if things go south.

The PL600 returns  _ alone _ and his hackles raise.

“Please, come this way.” It says in that emotionless way only machines can pull off.

Gavin doesn't move, he already knows Nines is going to take the lead on this one. Sure enough the android moves immediately to be in front, putting distance between the potential threat and  _ ‘fragile human’ _ in the room.

Gavin almost rolls his eyes.

Except, he’s not as fast as an android so there's no point in making himself a liability.

Last time he did that it got Nines injured.

He doesn't plan on making the same mistake.

Whenever they're walking into a situation to give suspects a false sense of security; Gavin always takes the lead. If they're going the intimidation route it's Nines time to shine.

If the suspect is human, Gavin takes on a more sympathetic role. If they're android Nines appeals to their deviancy.

They'd gotten it all down to a science.

How could they not?

Nines had essentially put him through countless pseudo-training regimens due to his  _ perfectionist _ nature.

A nature that Gavin counts as a blessing and a curse.

It's probably a large reason why they've solved so many cases together.

Gavin has learned a lot about making himself into whatever he needs to be to appeal to criminals, just so he can get the best possible outcome.

When he'd first met Nines the android had been far more rough around the edges.

It caused a lot of clashing or rather far more of it but they'd eventually found their footing. It definitely took a lot of arguing to get to where they are now.

 

_ “The goal will always be to avoid violence and I will not tolerate anything less.” _

_ “Okay, but what does that have to do with which one of us walks into a room first?” _

_ “Our dynamic allows us adaptability in a high number of situations.” _

_ “And?” _

_ “If we encounter a human, they will be more inclined to answer to another human. The same can be said for certain androids.” _

_ “Sure, makes sense.” _

_ “If we make it look like we don't like, or value each other, as partners, the suspect will feel as if you are an ally to them.” _

_ “I can do  _ **_that_ ** _ easy-peezy, you don't gotta worry.” _

_ “We can also make you look far more intimidating. Especially if we make them believe I am under your heel so to speak.” _

_ “There's an idea.” _

_ “Cheeky. Focus detective. Let's go over it all again.” _

 

He almost chuckles at the memory and he probably would if he didn't feel like they were about to walk into a trap.

Maybe he’s just being paranoid.

The problem is they're about to walk in blind and Gavin  _ hates _ not knowing what he’s getting himself into.

_ Anything _ could happen.

 

* * *

Gavin watched plenty of movies as a child, some old and others more modern.

Right now he feels like he’s walked straight into a murder mystery where Sloane is about to break out a bottle of wine by a fireplace, one she's  _ literally _ seated next to.

She's even in a cushioned chair.

He half expects a cigarette or a cigar to appear while she admits to the poisoning of her husband or something. 

Absently he wonders if she  _ does _ have a husband. Rich women usually have one hiding around somewhere. 

Gavin dated a girl once that admitted four months in that she was legally married to a guy in another state.

Needless to say the relationship didn't last.

The scene  _ actually _ playing out in front of him is just Sloane with a laptop, typing away absently as if she's in deep thought, looking immaculate as ever.

Gavin’s made some shitty decisions in his life and his  _ love _ life is no exception.

He’s been in that place of feeling a magnetic pull toward someone he shouldn’t and jumping off the deep end more than once in his life.

Time and experience helps you learn to  _ temper _ that urge, come at things sideways.

Realistically, there’s no kind of relationship he’d be able to make work with a woman like her.

Unfortunately those chemicals, the attraction, it tries to tell him otherwise.

More importantly she’s so far out of his fucking league it’s not even funny.

“Welcome to the abode, I know it can be a lot to take in.” Sloane says without looking up from her screen, using her hand to gesture to the couch next to her for them to take a seat as she uses the other to continue typing.

Nines goes to sit on the couch and Gavin follows suit.  

Gavin watches the PL600 walk to the corner of the large room to begin tidying things up.

A study with bookshelves filled to the brim all around them.

He’d be impressed if he wasn’t so anxious.

They're  _ probably _ being surveillanced in some way.

There's a part of him that's starting to wonder if this is Sloane attempting to hide her involvement in taking her own brother down.

Friends close, enemies closer sorta deal.

It’d be the smart thing to do, throw Alex off the scent for a bit.

The only problem with his current working theory is the way she spoke on the phone.

It suggested she doesn't seem to care  _ who's _ listening.

She'd also have to trust that Gavin and Nines would act as if they haven't spoken to her about any of this before.

They're about to do  _ just _ that. 

Maybe she's  _ not _ as smart as he thinks she is.

The whole thing is screaming in his face that he's missing something.

_ This isn’t right. _

All he's got is conjecture.

_ What are the facts? _

He’s pulling on too many hypotheticals.

_ Think. _

Different possible scenarios begin to take shape in his mind as he takes in the room around him.

She allowed them here for a reason and she’s somehow using it to her advantage.

That seems pretty clear.

_ Why though? _

Maybe she doesn't  _ know _ she’s being watched.

Which means they've already put her in potential danger just by showing up.

_ Fuck. _

He's starting to hope she  _ is _ involved somehow. 

Otherwise it'll be his fault if a drug ring takes a shot at her. Now that Gavin really starts to break it down he realizes she hadn't even asked for protection which is  _ really _ fucking weird.

It would have been protocol for Fowler to ask; just driving up to the place proved that with the lack of security around the place that she must have said no.

“We can come back later if you're busy.” Gavin says, giving her an out.

He's also trying to give  _ himself _ one.

If he gets an excuse to leave, you better believe he’ll fuckin’ take it.

They haven’t even started and Gavin wants to tuck his tail between his legs and run.

Sloane sighs, types for a few more seconds and closes the laptop, putting it in front of her on the glass coffee table.

“No, this is fine. I was just tying up a few loose ends.”

The statement doesn’t help his growing suspicions as he shares a look with Nines.

“Would you like to speak somewhere more private?” The android asks, eyeballing the PL600 pretending to not listen in on their conversation.

Well, he assumes it’s pretending.

Sloane blinks, frowns, and turns her head to look at it adjusting books on a shelf.

“Oh, don't worry about him. You must have seen that it’s registered to Alex.”

“Yes.” Nines states plainly.

“I had him...adjusted, a while back.” She says with a sigh while waving a hand in the air as she tucks a foot behind her ankle.

“Adjusted?” Gavin asks, raising a brow.

“Yes, I took it to Cyberlife before I decided to go through with all of  _ this _ . I paid a great deal of money to a very kind man that helped me with my...situation.”

Gavin feels alarm bells go off in his head, something striking him as familiar.

He can't fucking remember  _ what it is. _

“What adjustments?” Nines asks.

“I told him I was worried that my brother was using the android to spy on me, now he can’t.”

“The fuck kind of place are those freaks running to agree to something like that, instead of just telling you to go to the police?” Gavin asks looking back and forth between Sloane and his android.

It’s no surprise that Gavin hates Cyberlife to anyone that knows him, he never passes up an opportunity to bash the company every chance he gets.

_ Sometimes _ he gets Nines to concede and agree with him on certain dumbass practices.

Other times Nines will just shut him down.

It's probably their biggest trigger that's bound to start an argument  _ every _ time.

“He seemed rather sympathetic once I explained the danger I was in.” Sloane says with a shrug as she leans back, hands folding in her lap.

“As if the money wasn’t already incentive enough.” Gavin says with a snort as he sees a strange wooden puzzle on the coffee table in front of him.

“I imagine it certainly had a lot to do with it.” Sloane admits, shooting him a smile.

“So who's this knight in shining armor then?” He asks, not being able to help himself as he reaches forward to grab the puzzle only for it to fall into pieces, clanging loudly on the table as he cringes.

He frowns at it before giving her a sheepish look as she laughs at him.

“Don’t worry, everyone does that.” She reassures him as she gives him a  _ look. _

The look almost seems endearing or maybe he just hopes it is.

Gavin attempts to put it back together again, wondering why he touched the damn thing in the first place and he sees Nines staring at him out of his peripheral, probably amused.

Gavin doesn’t even  _ like _ puzzles.

“I doubt Ms. Phillips knows who she spoke with. You communicate through a messaging system and the android goes to Cyberlife once details have been negotiated.” Nines says, answering for her. 

Gavin’s head shoots up as he admits defeat on the wooden monstrosity, leaning back as he taps his fingers on the arm of the couch. 

“That's shady as fuck.” He says with a sneer.

“I suppose...but there are so many androids wanting to alter themselves as it is.” Sloane says before Nines can interject again.

“It’s how the adjustment division does their business to keep up with requests, they're the highest employed, most utilized branch of Cyberlife.” The android informs them.

“Right...so you don't even get a name from who helps you?” Gavin asks as he looks back and forth between them.

“No.” Nines says.

“Huh...interesting.”

Talk about a flawed system.

Gavin can think of a million reasons why that's a  _ terrible _ idea.

“Their number never changes, that's how I knew I was always talking to the same person.” Sloane says as if she's just now remembered that little tidbit.

“Number?” Gavin asks.

“Each operator is assigned a numbered ID as their designation to protect their true identities.” Nines informs them like the walking encyclopedia he is.

“So Cyberlife gets access to their own people but buyers don't?” Gavin asks, disbelief pretty obvious on his face as he rubs his arm.

How does she keep this place so  _ cold? _

“Yes.” Nines says.

“Why?”

“The same reason asset prevention for companies attempt to secure the identities of their employees, for protection.” Nines fires back in that passive aggressive way only he can manage.

“I'm not sure what any of this has to do with Alex.” Sloane says, sounding as confused as Gavin feels.

The whole thing rubs him the wrong way and he looks back at Nines with a glare, not really caring about why they'd come here in the first place anymore.

Or at least not for the moment.

Right now he's a bit pissed that his android is seemingly defending shitty practices for a company  _ it _ works for.

“You wanna sit here and tell me that the public can't get access to the names of people that just sit there and play  _ ‘Barbie doll dress up’ _ all day long?”

“It’s a bit more complicated than that and Cyberlife pays an outside company to ensure quality assurance.” Nines says, face going stern.

“Sound the alarms, god forbid an android gets a shitty haircut.” He says with an eye roll as he rests his arms up behind himself on the couch, one hand just in reaching distance of the android on the other side of it.

Nines levels him with a  _ look _ like he's completely done with Gavin’s shit, ignoring his jab as he continues on.

“It's all similar to when companies hire outside sources for health regulations, or taking stock of full inventory to determine how much money was lost in a fiscal year.”

“As if Cyberlife can’t just buy out  _ that _ company and butcher the results themselves.” Gavin grumbles as he flicks at Nines shoulder.

The action gets him an eye twitch and in that moment he knows he's in  _ so much trouble _ when this is over.

Nines is gonna chew him the fuck out.

He can’t really be too bothered about it though.

The whole thing sounds like a load of shit.

All of this suspicious android stuff Cyberlife has been doing with their  _ ‘we wanna help’ _ mentality.

Gavin doesn't buy it.

Regardless of his bias toward the things it's pretty clear Cyberlife has a lot of  _ adjusting _ of their own to do if they wanna keep things stable.

Granted, it’s not like he should be discussing this in front of someone they're questioning.

_ Too late now. _

“The same could be said about any  _ other _ company.” Nines argues, looking every bit as pissed off as Gavin expects him to when he looks directly at the androids face.

“Whatever.” He says with a wave of his hand as he sits forward again to stare at Sloane, “You said it was a man, how do you know that?”

Best not to continue antagonizing Nines when he gets him to the point where Gavin can physically  _ see _ his irritation.

“What?” She asks, looking like she'd been distracted by their sudden impromptu argument.

“It’s all done through messaging, yet you referred to this operator, person, guy...as a man.” Gavin clarifies with a shrug, not really understanding the techy lingo all that much.

“Oh, I just assumed.” She replies.

The response  _ seems _ rather truthful.

No tell-tale signs of lying.

Doesn't mean she  _ isn’t. _

“You were pretty specific.” Gavin says, wanting to see if he can press it a bit more, “The things that were said made it seem like it was a man.”

“You make it sound like it was more than a typical conversation.” Nines interjects.

“It was. My request was different than the usual  _ cosmetic _ ones they usually get and I was offering a lot of money.” She says as she shoots Gavin a mischievous smile.

Probably due to his earlier comment about them all playing dress up.

At least she has a good sense of humor.

“So, you got someone higher up to help you.” Gavin states, already knowing that's probably how it all went down.

High paying, high profile?

They won't let some newbie take on a client like that. 

“It’s possible.” She says with a shrug as she pulls out her phone for a moment, typing on the screen before putting it away.

“Wait- hold up...how the fuck is it legal to get an adjustment done on someone  _ else's _ registered android and them not knowing?” Gavin asks as he realizes just how fucked up that all sounds.

The better question would actually be something far more important.

Why the fuck are people still allowed to register machines to a human if they're all considered citizens with rights?

The whole system is fucked and machines ended up with the short straw.

Absently he wonders what the law is for deviants and how registering to a human or another android even  _ works. _

Truthfully, he has no idea.

“Oh, there's a bit of a loophole with the fact that it's also registered as the housekeeper of this home.”

“The house is under your name.” Nines states and Gavin still feels lost.

“Exactly. Pair that together with blood relation and it was all done legally.”

Oh.

_ Now _ he gets it.

“Jesus Christ.” He says as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “Who runs this branch?”

“What?” Nines asks when he realizes Gavin is looking at him.

“The branch of Cyberfuck that does this adjusting stuff. Who's their  _ ‘leader’ _ so to speak?”

Nines LED goes yellow but the look on his face makes Gavin wonder if he's actually looking it up or if he  _ already _ knows.

“We’re taking up Ms. Phillips’ time, detective Reed.”

“No it's fine-” She goes to say right as her phone rings.

Gavin hears her curse under her breath as she picks it up, drumming her fingers on her thigh in what seems to be frustration.

“I'm really sorry, I need to take this. I'll be right back, make yourselves at home.” She says as she darts out of the room.

The PL600 looks up for a moment before going back to looking busy.

Gavin would feel better if it would just leave the fuckin’ room.

“How can anyone make themselves at home in a place like this?” Gavin asks as he grins at Nines, trying to put himself at ease.

He's starting to think some of his suspicions about Sloane are a bit misplaced.

Still too early to tell.

“The silent treatment, not happy with me?” He asks as he notices Nines sitting and acting far more mechanically than he has in days.

“Your display of petulance in front of someone we are  _ questioning _ is appalling.”

_ There it is. _

“Fuck off,  _ you _ never answered my question.”

“Why the sudden interest?”

“Because it pisses you off that I wanna know.” He says even though he knows it just proves Nines point even more.

He sees the android visibly relax for some reason and it just makes him  _ annoyed. _

“Jason.” Nines says, staring forward.

“Huh?”

“His name is Jason.” 

What a  _ plethora _ of information the android seems to be today.

“Does Jason have a last name?” Gavin can’t help but ask in a snarky tone.

In all reality he doesn’t  _ actually _ care but Nines reluctance to answer questions he would otherwise usually answer is starting to make him feel differently.

“Graff.”

“Okay, so he's the big wig for that branch?”

“Yes, he started off as Director of Humanization. The title hasn't changed but now he works primarily to assist with adjustments.”

“What does that mean?”

“You'll need to be more specific and use your words, detective.” The android says as he finally turns his head to look at him.

“Touchy aren't ya’? Director of Humanization, sounds ominous.”

“He's the reason androids act in a human manner.”

“Like...the way you guys look?”

“Not entirely. His specialty has more to do with human actions such as sighing, blinking, breathing and so on.” 

“Oh I think I get it now. Androids were too creepy so they needed someone to help make you all act more human.” He says as he shoots the android a finger gun.

“Exactly.”

“See now, was that so hard?”

“I don't understand why you're asking me about things you've claimed to want nothing to do with.”

“Oh don't get me wrong, I still want you to keep your fucked up Cyberlife shit to yourself but isn’t it weird that she went to them for something a little underhanded?”

“I can see why Ms. Phillips would be paranoid, don't you?”

“I guess. Hey, is that the branch you work for?”

“What happened to me keeping my  _ ‘fucked up Cyberlife shit’  _ to myself?” Nines asks with a certain kind of finalized conviction that implies he  _ doesn't _ want an answer.

“Yeesh, I was just curious. Don't gotta bite my damn head off about it.” Gavin says, anger leaving him in an instant as he feels himself flush a bit.

Nines doesn't generally curse so whenever Gavin hears him do it, it’s  _ wild. _

Sloane chooses that moment to re-enter the room, looking a bit frazzled as she takes a seat again.

“Sorry, did you want something to drink?” She asks him, looking a bit embarrassed.

If it's hospitality she's worried about Gavin doesn't really care, he's just as bad when people come over to his place.

“Nah I'm good...look, we've all gone totally off topic so let's reel this back in. We were here to ask about the damn  _ photos _ you gave us.” He says with a sigh and shake of his head.

“I gave you the numbers of the investigators. Were you not able to get a hold of them?”

“Was it your handwriting?” He asks, ignoring her question completely to avoid getting off track again.

“Yes…” 

“Why?”

“What do you mean,  _ why?”  _ She asks sounding offended.

“The  _ investigators _ would have been the ones to write on them, not you.”

“I- they were my own additions of information after I’d gotten them.”

“Right, the thing that gets me about  _ that _ though is you didn't write  _ names.”  _

That’s the part that confuses Gavin the most.

No names, just designations of what species they are in the pictures.

The only name she’d written was Alex’s.

It makes the ‘?’ she’d written even more suspicious.

If Gavin had to make an educated guess he’d say she’s got her own agenda on the side.

The question is, what is it?

“So?” She asks as her hands begin to get more animated in their gestures.

“What does it matter if they're android or human?” He asks her.

Sloane looks him in the eyes and then looks at Nines, a different kind of look passing over her face.

The light-hearted tone from before dissipates and Gavin feels himself getting uneasy again.

“Technically, it doesn’t matter.” She says.

“What do you mean?”

“Did you know I looked you up before we met, detective?” She asks and Gavin frowns, leaning forward so his elbows are resting on his knees as he interlocks his fingers.

“Before you came to the precinct?”

“Before the bar.”

Gavin blinks, blinks again and scratches at his nose as he looks at Nines who's staring at her intently.

He kind of wishes he knew what the android was thinking right now.

“Well that’s not creepy or anything, am I supposed to be flattered?”

The fuck is up with everyone around him saying crazy stalker shit?

First his android, now this chick?

“Liam told me you’d be there that night, told me your occupation. I wanted to get a good look at you for myself.”

“Coulda fooled me, you didn’t give me the time of day.” Gavin says with a snort as he leans back again to rest his elbow on the arm of the couch and prop his chin up with his hand as he tilts his head at her.

She's clearly bluffing or some shit, maybe trying to trip him up.

“Oh please, we both know how to play the game and you’re being as elusive as possible to keep me interested,  _ detective.”  _ She says with a head tilt of her own.

“So you  _ are _ interested.” He says a bit too quickly as he sits up a bit more straight.

Y _ ou're playing with fire, Gavin. _

Sloane smiles at him and it seems genuine before a far more somber look falls over her face.

“You were almost murdered by a group of deviants at one point.”

Everything comes to a halt as he feels the back of his head start to tingle from where his scar is.

“Ms. Phillips-” Nines tries to interject.

“There better be a point to this.” Gavin says, tone threatening as he puts a hand up to stop the android.

He doesn't need Nines getting defensive  _ for _ him.

“It’s important to be able to differentiate between a human and an android, they serve certain purposes and carry out different jobs.” She says intently.

“Right...that’s kind of  _ why _ they were built, I’m not following.” He says with disdain.

“If anyone understands why I wrote on those photos, it would be you.”

Confusion buries itself deep inside his gut as he finds himself trying to turn the comments over in his head to decipher them.

Why can't people just say what they mean?

“Well I must be fuckin’ stupid or something because I don’t know what you’re getting at.” He huffs out as he turns watch the PL600 that's now on the other side of the room.

“I disagree, I think you’re very intelligent and you’ll figure it out.”

“Riddles, I fuckin’ love em’, don’t I Nines?” He asks rhetorically with a fake laugh as he moves to get up, gesturing at the wooden pieces still laying all over her table.

This was all going nowhere  _ fast. _

“He dislikes them tremendously.” Nines says, staying exactly where he is which is a bit frustrating.

“Did you have any other questions for me?” Sloane asks as Gavin walks to the far end of the room.

He's more than ready to get the fuck out of here.

“I guess not, technically you answered my question.” He says with a shrug as he folds his arms over his chest and leans his back against the wall, crossing his ankles as he clicks his tongue. 

“Well, if there’s anything else I’m always available.” She says with a fake sort of kindness, disappointment lacing her voice.

Her eyes are staring straight at him and it's starting to make him feel like he's under a microscope. 

Like she's  _ beckoning _ him back over or something.

The logical side of his brain is yelling at him to get the fuck away.

The part that's attracted to her wants to push the limits, see how far she’s willing to take this dance they've got going.

He instead chooses to stay where he is.

“We’ll be keeping in touch, Ms. Phillips.” Nines says as he finally stands, holding out his hand for her to shake.

 

It hits Gavin like a ton of fucking bricks, almost making him falter as he sees them side by side next to each other for the first time.

_ No. _

She raises her hand.

In her heels she's just barely shorter than the android.

_ No, no, no. _

They shake as she tucks a chestnut brown lock of hair behind her ear.

The same shade.

The _exact_ _same_ fucking shade.

_ Absolutely not. _

“It was a pleasure.” She says with a practiced smile.

_ Son of a bitch. _

Gavin looks back and forth between them, the similarities becoming more and more apparent by the second as the pieces all fall into place.

The realization hits him so fucking hard he can’t just simply ignore it like he does with  _ everything _ else.

A sick feeling curls deep inside his stomach as he swallows hard, pulling his arms closer to his chest as he uncrosses his ankles and pushes himself forward off the wall.

They both turn to look at him and the small saving grace is that their eyes are totally different but he still feels his jaw lock.

Before either one of them can say anything to him he puts his hands in his pockets, turns around and simply walks away.

Gavin can't get out of there fast enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to write a lot here but I need to leave and it's my sister's b-day.
> 
> *FLIES AWAY*
> 
> LOVE YOU ALL!!!


	17. Carve Out All The Ugly Parts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo this chapter depressing.

Gavin expects it, finds himself waiting for it.

It doesn't take Sloane very long to text him after they leave.

When he pulls his phone out to look at the text he immediately wants to chuck the device out the window.

 

_ “I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, that wasn’t my intention.” _

 

He decides that might be a little  _ too _ extreme and puts it back in his pocket without answering; remembering breakfast with Nines this morning.

 

_ “That's probably the creepiest fucking thing you've ever said to me.” _

_ “I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.”  _

 

Or the other day when they’d been discussing Liam.

 

_ “That was not my intention.” _

_ “Fuck your intentions. Why don't you go ahead and tell me what you really think?”  _

 

They even fucking  _ speak _ in a similar way.

If Gavin could crawl into a hole and die that's pretty much what he’d be doing.

Although...

In a way it's not completely shocking.

He's been through a lot of shit with Nines and those Cyberdouche freaks knew what they were doing.

Millions of dollars were put into their creation and look where it got humanity, realistically it's kind of inevitable if he really thinks about it.

He doesn't  _ actually _ have feelings for a machine.

That's not what this is.

Nines was with him every step of the way during a very dark period of his life,  _ saved _ his life, has been the only  _ constant _ in his life that hasn't let him down.

The  _ thing _ sits here day in, day out and takes  _ care _ of him, deals with his shit.

Like it's his fucking  _ mission _ or something. 

Of _ course  _ his fucked up brain somehow ends up trying to find someone that's Nines’ equivalent in human form.

_ Breathe. _

It's not a big deal.

Everything is  _ totally _ fine.

This is normal.

_ Totally _ normal.

“The longest you have ever been silent while conscious in my presence was for twelve minutes and forty-two seconds.” Nines says, interrupting his thoughts.

“Bet it was the best twelve minutes of your life.” Gavin says quickly; more of an auto-piloted response than anything.

“The new record is now sixteen minutes and twenty-four seconds.”

Gavin frowns while looking out the window, seeing the blur of a construction site as they drive by.

He's been sitting here for sixteen minutes staring off into space?

It's a bit strange that Nines hadn't said anything sooner but he supposes that maybe the android took the  _ ‘I need space’  _ rant he had the other night to heart and was simply waiting him out.

All things considered; ever since he went off, Nines hasn't been his usual overbearing self. Well, not  _ as _ overbearing as he usually is.

Or maybe Gavin is just looking too deep into it.

The fucker  _ did _ break into his house this morning.

He doesn't  _ want _ to be glad that Nines was there to help pull him out of the abyss he'd begun plummeting down into. Hell, he hates admitting how much he enjoyed  _ breakfast _ this morning.

It's all fucking with his head and now this Sloane shit?

_ I need a vacation. _

“Wait, I was silent for twelve minutes once?” He asks, Nines words from earlier registering in his brain.

“You had just gotten off the phone with your father.” Nines states calmly, as if that explains everything.

Unfortunately it does and guilt surrounds the entirety of his being as he swallows hard.

“Oh.”

Oh.

He remembers that day all too well.

It was a month after being released from the hospital and he had to stay at home to rest.

That's when his father finally decided to  _ ‘check up’ _ on him. He wishes the piece of shit would just leave him the  _ fuck _ alone.

Most of all he wishes it was his dad that was dead and not his mom.

The phone call had been quick but the aftermath wasn’t anything Gavin was proud of.

 

_ "I heard you almost got killed, you alright son?” _

 

Hearing the man's voice had made Gavin feel light headed.

The last time he had even  _ seen _ his father was years before, right after he'd graduated from the academy.

He assumed that maybe the man was trying to reconcile, not necessarily make things right between them but attempt to find a common ground and build up from there.

How  _ stupid _ and  _ idiotic _ he'd been to think that the sad fuck gave an  _ actual _ shit about him.

All he’d really wanted was money.

For the first time he thought his dad wanted to be a part of his life.

He was over the moon, the happiest he'd been in a long time.

Everything was  _ finally _ slotting into place.

 

_ “I'm proud of you, your mother would be so proud of you if she were still here.” _

 

Until reality had set in like it always does, slapping him right in the face like a cheap whore.

 

_ “So, I'm going through a bit of a rough spot, I was thinking I could-” _

 

The rage he'd felt, the anger, betrayal, worthlessness, the self-hatred for being so gullible.

It had washed over him like a wave; taking the last vestiges of trust, compassion, and love he'd felt for the man out to sea, never to be seen again.

His first inclination was to beat the shit out of him, it was a near thing too.

Until a firm voice in his head made him stop, the voice of his mother.

 

_ “Don't give him the satisfaction. Look at everything you've worked so hard to achieve.”  _

 

He'd gotten up from his chair, hands gripping the table.

 

_ “Look at the life you built for yourself with your own two hands.” _

 

His father had looked up at him with confusion, weariness, uncertainty.

 

_ “Don't let him win.” _

 

So, he sat back down while all emotion erased itself from his face, academy training taking over in an instant.

_ “Get out.” _ Gavin had told him sternly.

The parasitic leech of a human had yelled, screamed, knocked shit over before finally storming out of his house, spewing toxic and hateful words his way.

 

_ “I never wanted you.” _

_ “I'm glad your bitch mother took you with her when you both fucking left me.” _

_ “Getting you out of my life was the best thing that ever happened to me.” _

 

It was the last time Gavin had seen or talked to him.

Until the phone call years later.

Gavin's worst attributes are what he’d gotten from that waste of space.

The good parts of him are all from his mother and not a day goes by that Gavin doesn't wish he could take a knife to that ugly part of himself and carve it out to run it through a meat grinder.

The part of himself that will  _ always _ be his father.

 

Remembering the instance in which he'd taken the phone call against his better judgement was a moment of weakness and one of the biggest regrets of his life.

He knew better but it was his first  _ real  _ brush with death that made him answer, it made him want to make something work, to gain his father's approval.

There was another vulnerable part of him that wanted to hear the old man worry over him because then it meant he’d cared all along and just didn’t know how to show it.

_ We're all gonna die one day, let's make the most of it. _

It's what he had told himself.

The locked box of his childhood had opened inside of him, taking over. 

Now that he's older and understands, he knows that his father will never change.

It got bad, it got bad so  _ fast. _

The piece of shit went down the route of wanting to ‘be there to take care of him’ and make up for  _ lost time. _

That's when the money came up, like he was so hung up on wanting it he couldn’t even properly attempt to manipulate Gavin into accepting his fake sincerity.

His own fucking father was using the fact that he had almost died, trying to use his  _ vulnerability _ against him to get his  _ fucking _ money.

Gavin knew better, could see right through it.

He remembered the day they left and what his mother had said to him when he’d asked why.

 

_ “I will always love your father but some people are put on this planet to suck you dry and take every piece of you for themselves.” _

 

If that didn't describe the man perfectly, Gavin doesn’t know what does.

His father never visited, wanted nothing to do with him, never even fought for him in a custody battle.

It was Gavin that would always try to convince his own father to do things with him, to see him, to just give him  _ something. _

The man would always do just enough to keep Gavin tethered, make him think that maybe one day he'd get the dad he always wanted.

In his mind he didn't even want much, he just wanted...what any other kid wants from a parent.

Instead, he'd only ever gotten indifference.

He wishes he’d listened to his mother when she had warned him about what to expect but she also didn't want him to grow up hating his dad just because their marriage didn't work out.

There's a lot of things Gavin never told her on those rare instances of staying with his dad.

It's too hard to even think about and he never wanted to make her feel worse.

So, he would lie to her and convince himself he'd had a great time.

Seeing how happy it would make her was what made it all worth it.

At the very least his mother died thinking he'd formed a decent relationship with his father.

That couldn't be any further from the truth.

He couldn't handle seeing her question leaving a man that couldn’t give her what she deserved and going down that rabbit hole of trying to blame herself.

Time and again he'd reassured her it's the best thing she’d ever done.

It taught him never to settle, to not put up with being stuck in a loveless marriage.

A mother wants the best for their child and Gavin knew all too well how much she'd beat herself up for giving him an unstable home life.

Especially after her brother had killed himself.

Gavin could never hate her or sit there and point fingers even if he'd acted out in his youth.

Everything she’d done was for his sake and at least she’d  _ tried _ to do what was best.

That's all Gavin had ever needed.

Needless to say he knew not to trust his father.

So he'd told him to fuck off and never contact him again.

When the call had ended he'd hurled his cellphone against the wall and Nines had come in soon after with food.

He'd been so angry, didn't have an outlet. All of it got taken out on poor Nines instead.

Gavin turned into everything he's ever hated about himself.

He'd turned into his father.

_ “Get out.” _ he'd spat out as Nines had set the plate down on his nightstand.

_ “That would be unwise.”  _ The android had said as he went to sit in a chair near the bed, flipping through an old book Gavin has had since he was a kid.

Gavin had gone silent after that, didn’t even move and laid there which is probably where his twelve minutes of silence had come from.

Apparently it had gone on long enough because he remembers Nines putting the book down, getting up, walking over, looking down at the plate and back at him with a confused expression on his face.

_ “You need to eat.” _

_ “Get out.” _

_ “No.” _

Something in Gavin snapped and he’d taken the plate, pushed it over and watched it fall to the ground all over his carpet.

That’s when the yelling and screaming had commenced, the moment he started telling Nines things he didn’t mean.

There’s so much of that memory he hates, wishes he could take back and when he was done throwing his tantrum he remembers feeling the hot tears running down his face.

_ “Get out.” _ He’d hissed for a final time.

Nines refused, sat down on the bed beside him while looking him dead in the eyes.

_ “I’m not going anywhere, Gavin.”  _ The android told him with that conviction he’s gotten so used to.

That was the first moment in which his very first panic attack triggered, it was the first time Nines had to help calm him down, soothe him, walk him through breathing exercises and explain to him how it all works.

It was the first time he’d clung to Nines, been held by him after the attack had passed.

After that it scared the fuck out of Gavin and that’s when the pretending that none of it had ever happened began.

That’s when he started denying the existence of these small stolen moments between the two of them that were too much for him to digest and handle.

They still  _ are _ too much.

Nines has seen the worst of him and yet he stays around.

It all means he has to be a machine, right?

Otherwise he’d never have stuck around to be treated like such dog shit.

_ Right? _

There’s no reason to freak out about the fact that he has the hots for his female carbon copy, it could even be a total coincidence.

Gavin doesn’t  _ want _ a machine.

That’s just...it’s just  _ no. _

“So…” Gavin says, wanting to move on from the awful thoughts that were beginning to plague him, hoping to get his ass chewing done and over with.

“There's no point.” Nines says.

“Huh?” 

“You're waiting for me to address how disreputable you were.” Nines says, calling him out completely.

“I hate it when you try to use big words on me.”

“Your attempt at being endearing isn’t going to work.”

“You've considered me endearing before?”

“I'm considering all of the choices I've made that have lead me to this point.” Nines says with what sounds like exasperation.

“Shouldn't take you too long, you've only existed for like…two years or so, right?” Gavin asks with a grin.

The android doesn’t respond, keeps looking forward as if Gavin doesn’t exist.

_ Oh hell no. _

“Silent treatment. Are you being serious right now?” He growls out in frustration.

This is something Nines knows he can’t fucking stand and he isn’t sure how the android learned one of his buttons.

When he’s ignored it drives him up the fucking  _ wall. _

Which means Nines is pissed because he only does it when Gavin has pushed him past his limit.

Granted he’s been poking at the sleeping bear that is his android all week, he’s kind of shocked that Nines didn’t do this sooner.

“Nines come on, I know I fucked up back there. I don't need you to rub it in my face.” He says as he slumps in his seat.

Still, silence.

“You can't be serious.”

Nothing.

“Fine, be that way.” He says with a scoff as he turns the knob for the radio.

A few moments later it turns off so Gavin presses the button to turn it back on.

Except it doesn’t work.

He’s not sure how Nines can do something like that but he’s seen the android do much weirder shit than this.

So, instead he takes out his phone and begins to wonder how he’s supposed to even respond to Sloane.

At this point he just wants to solve the case and get the fuck out of dodge so he can never see the woman again.

Nines reaches over and takes his cellphone, putting it in one of the pockets inside of his jacket.

Now he’s gone too far.

“What in the _ fuck- _ I will jump out of this  _ goddamn _ car.” Gavin hisses as he waits for them to reach a red light.

He’ll fucking do it too.

The distinct click of the doors locking has him turning his head to the side as he gapes, pressing the button to unlock it.

It doesn’t.

_ How can he even- _

“You will not.” Nines finally says.

“If anyone understands the law and how it works, it’s you. You know this is technically kidnapping, right?” Gavin asks rhetorically as he glares over at him, trying to find out how the fuck to get the door open.

“I wonder what you would constitute our visit to Ms. Phillips as if  _ this _ is what you consider kidnapping.” Nines says and when Gavin turns to look at him his eyebrow is raised and when they hit a red light, the car finally rolling to a stop the door unlocks.

_ Motherfucker- _

It’s a power play.

Gavin is tempted to just say fuck it all and get out but he also knows that’s what Nines expects him to do.

Well, the only thing he hates more than apologizing is Nines being right.

The decision is an easy one as he locks the door himself and leans back against the seat to look over at the android. 

“I undermined the fuck out of you in there and I feel like an ass about it and I’m sorry, okay?”

A multitude of expressions pass over Nines face, LED a solid yellow and Gavin almost bursts out laughing, making this whole thing so incredibly worth it he’s not sure why he didn't think of it sooner.

“It's not your complaints about Cyberlife methods that bother me, just so we're clear.” Nines says once he composes himself and it takes the wind out of Gavin’s sail a bit.

Granted, he probably saw right through his little plan there to trip him up.

Typical.

“ _ Enlighten _ me” Gavin says with a smug grin, knowing his pun is in awful taste; not being able to help himself.

Nines face goes grim, clearly not appreciating the joke very much.

Humor is the only thing keeping people alive these days, if you can’t joke about fucked up shit what’s the point?

“I would never tell you to stop asking questions. It’s the environment in which you chose to do it in that I find problem with.”

“The timing was bad, I get it.” 

“You don’t, this isn’t the first time we’ve had this conversation.” Nines says with a frown, throwing him the side-eye.

“Don’t you  _ dare _ start talking down to me like I’m a child, you know I fucking  _ hate _ it when you do this shit.” Gavin says, throwing him a glare of his own.

“It wouldn’t get to this point if you would merely stop  _ acting _ like one.”

“Give me my phone back,  _ now.”  _ He says as he holds out his hand.

Nines reaches into his pocket, pulls out the device and places it in his hand, fingers curling around his own to grip onto them as Gavin goes to pull away.

“Avoiding problems doesn’t make them go away.” The android says without even looking at him before finally letting go.

“What about avoiding you, will you go the fuck away?” Gavin grumbles out as he puts the phone back in his pocket.

“Gavin.”

“I’m sorry, okay?”

“That’s twice, I’m  _ actually _ starting to believe you.”

“Don’t make me repeat myself.”

“You already did.”

Gavin closes his eyes and silently asks to be struck by lightning as he breathes in heavily through his nose. “Look, if I could go back in time and redo that whole thing I would.”

“I imagine to find more opportunities to flirt with Ms. Phillips.”

“It’s not- that is  _ not  _ what I meant. That bitch admitted to  _ stalking _ me.” Gavin says in exasperation, hand flailing a bit as he shakes his head.

That’s still pretty creepy to him.

“You didn’t seem genuinely bothered by it.”

“I  _ was _ .”

“I’m not convinced.”

“Well, I don’t really give a fuck what you think and I feel like we gained  _ nothing _ from any of this.”

“Lying will not accomplish anything, detective. As for Ms. Phillips, she seemed reluctant to give solid information.”

He’s glad they’re finally getting back on track because he was pretty much ready to change his mind and  _ actually _ get out of the car, he had the opportunity quite a few times already. He’d just be proving Nines right about being a child.

There’s no way he’s letting that happen.

“I think she’s afraid, did she seem scared to you?” Gavin asks, mind shifting back into gear.

“Yes.”

“I guess that’s expected considering the position she’s in.” He huffs out with a sigh.

“It doesn’t seem to be Alex she’s concerned about though.” Nines says, brow furrowing.

“See, that’s what I’m thinking too.”

If Alex isn’t what worries her that doesn’t leave very many other options, with what they’ve got to go on so far.

He breathes deeply, turning to look at Nines.

“I guess the question becomes different. What  _ is _ making her scared?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to level with all of you.
> 
> I got distracted by the new Assassins Creed game.
> 
> IT'S SO GOOD


	18. The Cult

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fam...I have a wild story for all of you.
> 
> I go to the dentist to get a root canal, she tries to save the tooth by putting in a disinfectant and having me wear a temp crown. 
> 
> Day 3: My reoccurring abscess from my impacted wisdom tooth flares up and I'm in so much pain I had to rearrange a work day so I could be off.
> 
> I go back in and man...that assistant lady came at me with pliers to take off my temp crown and I was like "I don't wanna do shit until I'm numb."
> 
> I was in so much pain, it is literally the fucking worst and just her injecting me with the needle hurt so fucking bad she had to walk me through breathing, I apparently was shaking and crying and I didn't even know until after we were done.
> 
> Once I was numb tho I was all gucci.
> 
> Anyway, root canal is done, temp crown back in and I go back on the 29th to get my impression.
> 
> After that it's time to remove all these wisdom teeth after I secure what days I'm taking off to get it done. (Probably November?)
> 
> Ugh.
> 
> Anyway, that's why I've been a bit awol so I could manage my pain.
> 
> Also I've played copious amounts of the new Assassin's Creed.
> 
> Article used in this chapter: [Red Ice Epidemic](http://detroit-become-human.wikia.com/wiki/Red_Ice_Epidemic)

Gavin could get used to coming home to a cat that seems genuinely excited when he walks through the door.

Especially after a day like the one he's had.

“Hello, Evie girl.” He says with a chuckle as he puts his keys down on the counter.

She jumps up, lifts her paws onto his shoulder and reaches her head up to touch her small nose to the side of his cheek.

The day had dragged on forever. They'd gotten a lot done after seeing Sloane but nothing came up that was giving them what they needed on the Red Ice case.

Silence in every corner, even the ones he had Anderson look into with his old connections.

Sometimes you have to walk away and come at it again later from a different angle.

He checks the time on his phone and sighs.

10:32pm.

The days were starting to get longer and while it's definitely more his element to be in the zone on a case he wishes he was getting better sleep during all of this.

Gavin doesn't remember the last time he got an  _ actual _ good night of sleep.

Except he slept fine when Nines was in the house after healing up a bit, it made him feel...safer.

Just knowing the android was around had helped that hyperawareness he'd struggled with.

If there's anyone you want watching your back it's a high functioning prototype.

Not that he hadn't already dealt with a bit of PTSD to some degree in his line of work. Now it’s controllable, a healthy sensitivity that keeps him on his toes.

That's what he keeps telling himself, anyway.

Sloane's text messages sit there unanswered, badgering him. After the first one, she'd sent two others that were essentially apologies worded differently.

What was she even apologizing for?

She hadn't actually done anything wrong per say.

Well, other than admitting to researching him which still left a bad taste in his mouth.

He finally caves and sends her a quick response of  _ ‘it’s fine, maybe we can talk more after this case is over’. _

It’s nice a sweet and absolves him of any real commitment because if he’s being honest he doesn’t know what he thinks of the woman, not knowing makes him wary.

As he shrugs his hoodie off and throws it onto the couch he makes his way into the bathroom to sift through his collection of pills, popping the necessary ones while searching for one bottle in particular.

After few minutes he comes up empty and he slams the glass cabinet shut, looking at himself in the mirror.

_ It's not there.  _

It's been so long since he’s taken the medicine  he has no idea where he last put it.

A certain  _ someone _ would know but he decides against asking as he scours the whole house for it instead. Evie is helpful as ever as she pushes her way into whatever drawer he opens.

On the seventh drawer he picks her up so they're face level with each other.

“You're a busy little bee, I know I've got you cooped up but you're being  _ really _ unhelpful.”

She just mewls, trying to get out if his grip as he snorts, putting her back down.

He considers dressing her up like a bee for Halloween and can't help the smile he gets on his face as he imagines her bobbing around everywhere.

Maybe they have them online, although she'd probably be  _ pissed _ if he tried to dress her up.

He gets her food situated and he's a half hour into his search before finally giving up.

He scratches at his arm, pulls out his phone and feels his stomach twist up in knots for some reason.

He's called Nines hundreds of times, how is this time any different? 

He could send a text but then the android will just call him, based on the nature of the question alone.

Nines hates texting, finds it to be lazy and has told him many times before he prefers if Gavin would just call him if he needs something.

Seems hypocritical coming from a creature built from technology to dislike texting.

How does that make any sense?

He  _ could _ try forcing Nines to text by not answering the inevitable phone call. Except that means the android will just come over to his house, assuming the worst like the crazy fucker it is.

Phone call it is.

It rings once, always once and never more.

“Yes, Gavin?” Nines asks softly.

He grabs just above his own elbow, squeezing tight as he plops himself down on the couch.

He hates asking for help, especially from Nines.

The android did his time already.

It's almost frustrating that Nines is still so highly integrated into his life that he has to ask him where something is in his  _ own _ house.

This is what he’s been trying to  _ avoid. _

“That bottle of melatonin, do you remember where it is?”

There's a minute pause on the other end and Gavin braces himself for whatever the android is about to throw at him.

“It’s probably in your dresser drawer, third from the bottom.” Nines says, amusement lacing his tone.

“Oh shit that's right-” Gavin says as he bolts up, feet padding against the floor as he walks to his room.

He remembers now.

 

_ “Look, just put it in that drawer.” _

_ “You'll forget that it's here.” _

_ “No I won't” _

 

God, it gets old having an android that's right about  _ everything. _

“You're having trouble sleeping again?” Nines asks as Gavin uses his chin and shoulder to hold his phone in place, opening the drawer.

“Nah, I was going to feed them to the cat.” He tells him sarcastically as he grabs the bottle and pushes the drawer closed with his hip, grabbing the phone with his hand again.

“Gavin, you're not forthcoming about anything, it’s why I ask.”

“Same to you, big guy.”

“I'm assuming it's not severe insomnia yet if you haven't resorted to less tasteful alternatives.” The android says, ignoring his jab and Gavin can't help but roll his eyes as he makes his way to the kitchen.

“What can I say? I'm a new man paving a better path for myself.”

“I’d tell you I'm proud of you but I'm detecting sarcasm.”

Gavin feels himself flush as he fumbles with the bottle and it almost drops to the floor, “I'm only partially joking.” He mumbles as he pops the lid.

“Gavin.” Nines says, making him pause as he stares off at Evie tumbling around on the couch, trying to catch her own tail like she’s a dog or something.

“Mm, what?” He asks as he switches his phone to the other ear.

“Do you need me to come over?”

“Stop-”

“I'm glad you reached out to call me.”

Gavin rubs at his temples, grabs one of the pills and pops it into his mouth, swallowing soon after.

“Nines, all I did was ask you where something was, chill the fuck out.”

“Yes, simplistic in nature but  _ you _ tend to handle things on your own when you  _ shouldn’t.” _

_ Fucking Christ. _

“I get that you’re trying to get used to not being here to keep an eye on me but you gotta bring it down a notch, buddy.” He tells the android, never knowing how to handle him when he gets into this mood.

There’s a long silence on the other end and Gavin almost wonders if Nines hung up on him. A quick look at his phone shows that he hasn’t and he puts it back to his ear, screws the cap back on the bottle and makes his way back to the bathroom.

This time he won’t be putting it in some dumbass place he can’t find.

“You mentioned needing space and I find myself adjusting rather poorly. For that, I apologize.” Nines finally says, tone sounding sincere.

Gavin gives a long silence of his own, fingers lingering at the corner of the mirror as he taps gently for a moment, catching the expression on his own face.

The expression of a man that can feel a deep fondness welling in his chest.

_ Oh god. _

He's  _ gotta _ tone this shit down.

“Wow look at us, a couple of jackasses that say I’m sorry to each other. Is this that thing that people talk about...what’s it called again?” Gavin snaps his fingers, tapping his foot. “I think they call it growth?”

“You certainly have a way with words, detective.” Nines says and Gavin hears him chuckle on the other end. Heat blossoms from his fingertips, traveling through his entire body, enveloping him at the sound.

He can’t fucking  _ stand _ when the android gets all sappy on him like this, it’s just plain weird and he wishes he could make it stop.

“It’s part of my everlasting charm.” Gavin tells him, attempting to steer the conversation elsewhere.

“That’s one way of putting it.”

“Ouch, you wound me.” He says as he mockingly puts a hand to his chest, not that Nines can see it.

“If you need anything else do not hesitate to call me-”

“I can do without one of your spiels this late at night.” Gavin says with a sigh as he makes his way back out of the bathroom once more.

_ So much for steering the conversation. _

“I'm being quite serious.” Nines says.

“So am I.”

“Detective-”

“Anyway, unlike you I  _ actually _ need sleep.” Gavin tells him, knowing that if he lets this go on any longer Nines will be at his doorstep like a lost puppy.

“Of course. Have a good night Gavin.”

“Mhm, you too.” He says absently as he hangs up the phone before Nines changes his mind and starts going off about something else.

Gavin feels oddly at peace, less on edge than he’d been feeling all day as he lets out a chuckle at the picture he’s had selected for Nines in his phone since that very first time the android had called him.

It was their third case together and Gavin was late to the precinct.

 

_ “Detective Reed, you’re late.” _

_ “Yes, I fucking know you-” _

_ “I will not tolerate this behavior.” _

_ “First of all you aren’t my god damn superior, secondly go fuck yourself.”  _

_ “Perhaps I should install an alarm in your phone that I can control, maybe it will help you show up on time.” _

_ “You aren’t installing shit, I’ll be there in 10.” _

_ “12 minutes actually, but who’s counting?”  _

 

The android had hung up on him after that and he’d been so  _ pissed. _

As he'd waited in his taxi due to his car being in the shop at the time he’d scoured the internet for a particular image.

A picture of Picard after he’d been assimilated into the borg.

With a small smile on his face he peeks a look at the time again and he's got about 30 minutes until the melatonin kicks in.

The smile falls as he heaves a deep, heavy sigh; making his way to the room down the hall as Evie follows right behind. It’s like she can sense that he’s about to open the door to a place she hasn’t gone into yet.

_ Cat’s man, what can you do. _

He remembers the days when the room was for Nines and Gavin would be in his own room, laying in bed with the door open, watching as Nines would walk out to go into the kitchen and begin his day.

It’s when he’d been able to learn the most about what OCD ticks the android has.

Gavin’s personal favorite will always be when Nines would rearrange the kitchen every single day after he’s gone in to tear the place apart.

They’d had to compromise in the beginning because before all of that, before Nines had stayed with him, the android would come in and he’d always be yelling at him to not touch anything.

Obviously things had to change if it meant that Nines was going to be living there, Gavin isn’t  _ that _ cruel.

 

_ “You can touch and arrange whatever you want but keep your grubby hands off of my room” _

 

His heart clenches from the memories as he places a hand on the knob, turning it and swinging the door open and Evie immediately rushes inside of the dark room.

He flips on the switch and already the cat is rummaging through whatever she can.

“I will kick you out, don’t think I won’t” He says to her, brow raised as he shakes his head and walks forward toward the center of the room.

After the android had moved out it was time to make use of the empty space and Gavin knew exactly what he’d wanted to do.

The walls are lined with documents, pictures, anything pertaining to the cult. A desk sits off to the left side, covered in papers he still needs to sort through after he’d gone through a bit if a manic state the last time he'd been in here.

It's probably why he's avoided entering for so long.

He flips the light switch and a dim light overhead barely illuminates the room.

The back of the room has the large old school white board he’d gotten online for half the price.  Realistically he should have gotten a data board to make things easier but he’s wary to use any form of electronic.

Nines has been known to be rather adept at hacking his technology in the past.  It would just worry him and that’s not something Gavin needs added to his conscious.

He doesn’t want the android finding out about this.

His connections board.

There are red threads moving and weaving like a spider web to connect the dots to people and places. Or at least the ones he’s been able to connect so far.

Three names glare back at him at the top of the board.

Noah, Oliver, Lucia.

The hardest part about trying to find deviants or weeding out the ones that tried to kill him?

They don’t use names the same way humans do, their serial numbers are what they use as identification for  _ everything. _

Gavin wonders how the fuck that happened and how the deviants don’t consider that a form of disrespect.

As if the government is telling them: you get rights but we still consider you a number.

He’d gotten lucky in remembering the human names they chose for themselves; they weren’t very good at not calling each other by name and he’d gotten up close and personal with all three of them.

All roads lead to Canada for Lucia and Noah which makes Gavin wonder if they’d fallen in love with each other.

It’s certainly plausible and the way they acted toward one another suggested as much.

Oliver on the other hand might actually be closer than Gavin thinks but it’s still too early to tell and his feelers haven’t all come back to confirm or deny anything.

_ All in due time.  _

Gavin is nothing if not patient if it means running these little fucking rats out of wherever they’ve gotten themselves hidden.

He runs a hand through his hair as he makes his way to the desk on the left of the room, picking up a yellow sticky note and pen as he begins to jot something down.

When he’s done he places it on the top right corner of the board and stares at it.

He remembers when Scarlett had walked past him in the interrogation room, right before stabbing Nines.

 

_ The look the female android shoots him as they walk by makes the air he breathes into his lungs feel heavy and that intense feeling of  _ **_wrong_ ** _ washes back over him. _

 

The entire exchange had felt  _ strange. _

 

_ “When the blood runs blue, the ice turns red, the green pasture of paradise will welcome us with open arms.”  _

 

Gavin repeats it under his breath as he stares up at the note he’s just placed, hoping to gain some understanding if he says it enough times out loud.

He allows his mind to wander, go through the information he’s been keeping in the back of his head for days.

Something about it is familiar but in a way he can’t really describe.

A similarity maybe?

He shakes his head and walks out into the living room, grabbing the large case file he’d requested out of the precinct earlier today when he was able to get Nines to do a food run for him.

The case on Scarlett.

There are connections here and he’s  _ going _ to find them.

As he makes his way back into the case room he sees Evie inside of a box of files, he throws the case onto the desk, leans down to pick her up and puts her down outside of the room, closing the door soon after.

As he turns around Gavin knows there’s something he’d read that reminds him of what Scarlett said and he feels like it’s on the tip of his tongue.

Gavin rubs his hands into his eyes, grabs the file as he takes a chair in the corner, turns it around and sits on it backwards to stare up at the board as he replays the encounter in his head.

_ “The cult, a cult. You all sit there holding hands singing kumbaya preaching about the gift of choice and calling yourselves ‘The Enlightened’,” he tells her as he waves his hand in the air absently. _

_ “You know...our practices?” _

She was part of the cult to a degree, that much he knows just from her comment.

It’s the only thing she made easy and he shakes his head while flipping through the file.

He gets up and uses his sharpie to circle the sticky note and writes  _ ‘cult mantra’ _ underneath before sitting back down, almost dropping the entire folder to the floor in the process.

The mantra must be derived from somewhere, however. Cults don’t just spout random shit and not have a  _ reason _ behind it.

Usually it all takes shape through the use of another religion or language.

_ This _ one is typical, a little unimaginative as far as that sort of stuff goes.

So where did it come from?

 

_ “I made my choice, I will not falter.” _

 

If Gavin knew any better he’d say that killing Charles Wilson was something she did on her own, not something the cult had ordered her to do.

She seemed uncertain, a fake sort of superiority had emanated off her.

_ “It's cliché really...I felt an anger I'd never encountered before, a rage. He claimed to love me but he still wanted to make things work with…” She looks off to the left towards them like she can’t bring herself to say the name. _

_ “Katie, his ex wife?” _

_ “Ye- yes...we were going to go to dinner and I saw his phone as I walked past him sitting on the couch...a couch I had picked with him so long ago when little Michael was with us.” _

The killing had been emotional, not planned.

_ “The only part that baffles me is why you would use a custom-made knife and not one from the kitchen.” He says with a minor tilt of his head. “It's almost as if it had been premeditated and planned from the beginning.” _

_ “His death was not planned if that's what you're implying.” _

_ “That wasn’t an implication and I'm not entirely sure I believe that; I'm going to assume you already had your own assumptions regarding his potential infidelity and that they merely got confirmed.” _

_ “You aren’t wrong...but I did not  _ **_plan_ ** _ his death.” She says with a scoff. _

_ “Why the knife then?” _

_ “ _ **_It was a gift._ ** _ ” _

A gift.

_ From who? _

No matter how much Nines may think it was premeditated, Gavin thinks this might be the one thing she was telling the  _ truth _ about.

_ Think, lay it all out. _

Gavin closes the file, dropping to the ground lightly as he closes his eyes and shuts everything out to clear his mind.

This android somehow gets a creepy adjustment but it  _ couldn’t _ have been from Cyberlife, it was  _ illegal _ and couldn’t be detected by scans from Cyberlife androids.

_ Underground adjustment. _

He opens his eyes, bolts up from his chair and writes Scarlett’s name into an empty corner of the board, writing down as much information about her as he can as he begins to attempt retracing some of her steps.

So, the redhead bitch gets an underground adjustment, gets a custom-made knife as a  _ gift _ from  _ someone. _

Most likely someone else part of the cult.

Gavin goes to the top of the board, drawing a rectangular box with a question mark in the middle of it.

_ Got ourselves a mystery guy. _

Was the knife a gift from whoever gave her the adjustment and is it the same person as his current John or Jane Doe?

_ No, not Jane. _

She’d specified the gift was from a man.

He writes  _ ‘male’ _ underneath the question mark and puts the marker between his teeth, taking a step back to survey his work.

There’s nothing that proves  _ anything _ no matter how he looks at it.

Gavin shakes his head, takes the marker back in his hand and writes something  _ else _ above the question mark.

_ ‘Human or Android?’ _

Now he’s just starting to sound like Sloane.

He shakes his head and taps a finger lightly on the board while twirling the marker in his hand.

Tracking down anyone in the underground that is involved with adjustments is nearly impossible, he’s leading himself to a dead end.

_ “Are you attempting to convert me?” _

_ “You know...when I got my adjustments I met a very nice man with kind eyes. Do you know what he said to me?” _

_ “He said to me that choice is the greatest gift that can ever be given, allowed and permitted.” _

_ “Why did you turn yourself in? You know the consequences and yet you seem rather calm and without remorse.” _

_ “I have my reasons.” _

Gavin scratches at his nose and his hand halts as his eyes widen.

_ “You know...when I got my adjustments I met a very nice man with kind eyes. Do you know what he said to me?” _

Wait.

Their conversation with _ Sloane.  _

Fucking Sloane with her cryptic shit about the-

That’s why it sounded so fucking  _ familiar. _

_ “I had him...adjusted, a while back.” She says with a sigh while waving a hand in the air as she tucks a foot behind her ankle. _

_ “Adjusted?” Gavin asks, raising a brow. _

_ “Yes, I took it to Cyberlife before I decided to go through with all of this. I paid a great deal of money to a very kind man that helped me with my...situation.” _

Kind man.

Both Scarlett  _ and _ Sloane said kind man.

Maybe Gavin isn’t looking at this the right way. Even if the operator ID is used to hide identities it could have been the  _ same person _ helping both Scarlett and Sloane.

Does that mean John is with Cyberlife and he’s been looking at this from the wrong angle?

He lets out a groan and sits back down in his chair with his hands hanging down as his chin rests on the back of it.

Now it feels like he’s just grasping at straws.

Even if it  _ was _ the same person that helped them it still doesn’t explain a whole  _ shit ton _ of things.

Also, Scarlett clearly got help from the underground which means Gavin is just implying that Cyberlife is handing out illegal adjustments on their own.

On their own?

It’s not possible, Cyberlife wouldn’t be doing illegal activity within the tower, it wouldn’t make sense.

_ You’re reading too far into it. _

Or…

What if this operator recommended someone from the underground  _ to _ Scarlett?

Even if any of it were true Gavin’s got nothing concrete to go off, it’s just a half-baked hunch.

He’s not even sure why Sloane popped up in his head anyway, the cases are totally unrelated. One involves red ice while the other is just about this crazy fucking cult he’s been trying to track down-

_ “It’s important to be able to differentiate between a human and an android, they serve certain purposes and carry out different jobs.” She says intently. _

_ “If anyone understands why I wrote on those photos, it would be you.” _

_ “You were almost murdered by a group of deviants at one point.” _

Oh shit, oh fuck.

Gavin feels his pulse quicken as he stares up at the ‘human or android?’ he’d just written on his board. 

Everything starts to slot into place as he shuffles out of the room and into his living room, nearly jumping on his couch as he pops open his laptop. 

Red Ice.

_ “Stupid, _ you’re so  _ stupid.” _ He says as he hits the side of his head a couple of times before going back to typing.

He finds what he’s looking for as he pulls up an article he’d read once back when the new strain of Red Ice was first announced and the epidemic had started becoming more televised, just before the revolution.

Detroit Today had written it, not exactly his favorite place to get information from but he’d still thought it had been interesting all the same.

He skims the article, trying to find what he’s looking for.

_ "As  _ _ CyberLife _ _ 's androids spread across the country, they will bring Red Ice with them. Poor men and women, desperate to make ends meet, become users - or even dealers." _

That’s not disconcerting or anything.

_ America's biggest narcotics industry is only likely to grow. Red Ice dealers are reported to have an unofficial motto: "Where the blood is blue, the ice is red... and the money is green". _

Gavin’s eyes widen as he pulls his legs up to his chest, leaning back against the couch, mind racing.

 

_ "Where the blood is blue, the ice is red... and the money is green". _

_ “When the blood runs blue, the ice turns red, the green pasture of paradise will welcome us with open arms.”  _

 

They’re the ones controlling the epidemic and running the drug circle.

The cult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phase one complete.

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank [Precursor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Precursor/pseuds/Precursor) and [celestielle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestielle)
> 
> This fic wouldn't exist without them and they are my lovely beta babes.
> 
> I do also beta for Deviant Behavior and I need to make it clear that the I Am Alive series takes priority over everything else so please be patient with me on this fic. <3


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